


Finding Home - by P. Rhapsody O'Brien

by probrien



Category: Kathryn Janeway - Fandom, Star Trek: Voyager
Genre: F/F, Lesbian Sex, Lesbians in Space, No Lesbians Die, Original Character(s)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-19
Updated: 2020-07-19
Packaged: 2021-03-05 02:48:13
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 65,531
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25377169
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/probrien/pseuds/probrien
Summary: Janeway gave a disgusted grunt and headed for her quarters, a much-needed bath, and some analgesics of her own. She looked one more time at the hat, thinking it had been a while since she had seen one. She tossed it in her closet and shut the door. Eventually, she would think the whole incident was funny but it wasn’t going to happen tonight.
Relationships: Kathryn Janeway & Seven of Nine, Kathryn Janeway/Seven of Nine
Comments: 67
Kudos: 88





	1. Part 1 - Finding Home

**Author's Note:**

> First of all, I would like to give thanks to the beta readers who helped bring this vision to life. It’s been in my hopper for over 12 years, and through their encouragement, their red pens, their suggestions, their help with a word or phrase when I so desperately needed it, and helping me hash out some sticking points, I can finally lay this to rest and pull the next one out. 
> 
> Mae, the Queen of Commas, and Jen (FemslashUniverse on Ao3), the Queen of the Ebb & Flow, I couldn’t have done this without you, writing machine or not. ;0) (((((big hugs))))) You both have my eternal gratitude in addition to "my" red pen. :) Last but not least, a huge debt of gratitude to T for riding sweep. You eagle-eyed ‘ole perv. LOL Thank you, old friend. :)
> 
> The standard gobbledegook applies. I don’t own any of the characters nor am I intending to infringe on any copyrights. This was purely a labor of love.
> 
> This story contains graphic depictions of lesbian sex and graphic language. By reading this, you are confirming that you are of legal age to read such things. If none of this is legal in your state, please consider moving. 
> 
> I have taken creative liberties with some aspects of the Star Trek universe and boldly proclaim my dominion over the ‘loose science’ (coupled with a lot of research) that fell from my fingertips.
> 
> ***Don't forget to leave snacks for your favorite writers!***
> 
> Without further adieu, buckle up and grab your tissues ─ I sincerely hope you enjoy the ride. :)
> 
> ~Rhapsody  
> https://prhapsodyobrien.wixsite.com/rhapsodyshaven

_**Finding Home** _

by P. Rhapsody O'Brien

  
  


_Captain’s Log, Stardate 62128.9_

_After completing much-needed repairs after our last run-in with the J’akar, we have resumed our course for the Alpha Quadrant and have entered the Turimaria system. Seven of Nine has informed me that this area is unremarkable with the exception of dense ionization bands that appear and disappear in irregular intervals. All pertinent departments have reported they are innocuous to Voyager’s systems and crew. There are no M Class planets to survey and no wormholes on the proverbial horizon. It’s almost as bad as the Void we traversed several years ago._

_Engineering reports that the warp core is operating at 98.6 efficiency, Tactical reports that shields and weapons are at 100 percent. The Doctor hasn’t had any emergencies, communication channels are normal, and we’re on course for the Alpha Quadrant at warp 7._

_Harry Kim will be promoted to Lieutenant tonight in the mess hall; Neelix is planning a surprise party. I couldn’t think of a better way to inform him that he passed his exams and he’s been too polite (or terrified) to ask. It’ll be a nice surprise and give the crew an opportunity to relax and celebrate. After the month we just had, they deserve it._ Computer, delete all but the first sentence.

_Tom has worked his way up from Ensign. I presented him his pip this morning in my ready room. We’ll see if he can hang on to it this time._ Computer, delete last sentence.

_Naomi Wildman has been given an unofficial uniform and extra responsibilities in her role as Captain’s Assistant. When she opened the package, her eyes lit up like a warp core, especially when she saw it was almost an exact replica of my own uniform. Rather than 4 round pips, she has 4 square pips inset into a rectangle. Close enough to my own but not close enough to step over Starfleet lines._ Computer, delete the last three sentences. 

_She will now be delivering PADDS from the Junior and Senior staff that need my direct approval. I had to fight to keep back the tears of joy and pride I felt when she walked out of the ensuite with her chest puffed out, looking every bit the consummate officer I know she will grow up to be._ Computer, delete last sentence.

_Seven of Nine has requested that more power be routed to the Astrometrics lab to enhance the sensor array. I have approved her request for a period of one day._

_All in all, it is a good day to be Captain._ Computer, delete last sentence, and end Captains Log.

_Personal Log: Kathryn Janeway_

_I’m so tired. The past few days have been hectic, to say the least. I have worked this crew ‘round the clock to get our warp engines back online and now that they are, I’m ready for a break. Ha! I’m the Captain of this ship so I don’t get any of those. Sure, Chakotay would be happy to take the reins for a few days but what would that say to the crew? I have to remain their rock, their salvation, so on I’ll keep slamming down the command mask but god...I’m so tired. I’m tired of coming home to empty quarters and not having someone I can share my day with. Someone I can curl up against and read, or just_ **_be_ ** _with. I’m tired of not having someone I can talk to about things other than this goddamned ship!_ “Computer, delete last sentence.”

_I can't sleep. It's going on three weeks now and if I don't do it soon, I’m afraid the doctor's going to order me to take a hypospray and relieve me of duty. Hell, he’s already ordered me to go to the holodeck for some R &R. Sometimes, I wonder why I made him a full-fledged member of this crew. After all, he isn’t even a real person, although he (and Seven of Nine) would argue that point. Granted, he has exceeded his programming and seeks to be more than the medical hologram he was programmed to be but, when it comes right down to it, he is still just photons and force fields. _

_Speaking of Seven of Nine, she stopped by again last night. She's been doing that more and more lately. I really am going to have to have a chat with her about that. A few weeks ago, I was in the middle of...well...never mind what I was in the middle of. Suffice to say I wasn't very happy about the interruption. Back to my point, she happened to notice one of my bodice ripper books. I explained to her that it was a twentieth-century romance novel. She cocked her ocular implant like she does and demanded that I state the purpose of romance. The short version of the story is that I told her romance was a way of expressing one's feelings for someone in a way that made them feel special and loved. She said something like ‘I fail to see the significance of superfluous gestures in order to initiate copulation.’ Thankfully, I had just swallowed a sip of coffee, otherwise, she probably would have ended up wearing it. As it was, I had to keep myself from laughing. Despite all evidence to the contrary, she gets her feelings hurt quite easily in certain instances... I told her if she did some research on it, romance probably wouldn’t seem so superfluous. She seemed to accept that answer but I wouldn’t be surprised if she comes to me later with more questions. Once she gets something in that head of hers, she’ll crew the marrow out of it._

_It pisses me off to no end that the Borg stole her life, and it amazes me to see how far she's come since I severed her from the collective. She still struggles to understand some of her emotions but who doesn't? She’s made great strides in the past ten years and I’m very proud of her. The crew finally started to accept her when she and B'Elanna became friends. Although I’m happy that Seven has made a friend, I fear B'Elanna has not been the greatest influence on her. Before the attack from the J’akar, I had to reprimand them both for turning Tom Paris the most amazing shade of purple. The ‘ole Utaberry in the showerhead trick. B'Elanna quoted me a regulation concerning the education of all crewmembers under her command in all manners pertaining to the effective cohesion of team and department. Ha! She claimed it was a ‘team-building’ exercise to show Seven the importance of humor. Personally, I think Seven’s sense of humor has been developing quite nicely_ **_without_ ** _the input of B'Elanna._

_Although she has been developing more social skills, she still comes to me quite often and that pleases me. Given that she has new friends now, I wonder how long she will continue to look to me. I envy the crew their closeness. It’s something I can’t have with them because I have to maintain a professional distance. They can never know that I don’t always have the answers. That sometimes, I choose to bank starboard simply because I have to make a decision; I have no idea if it’s the right one. Sometimes the decision to fire on a ship is simply rote training, and not because I think it’s the correct course of action. Sometimes I order the ship to run at warp 9 just because I fucking feel like it. No one questions it because they trust me. No, they can never know that there are nights so lonely I wrap my arms around myself and pretend that someone else is holding me or that sometimes I cry myself to sleep at night. No, they will never know this because always, I am their Captain. I am their rock and their salvation in this goddamn place. I can’t appear to be merely human among them. I always have to keep the fucking command mask plastered on my face. If I didn’t, morale would break down, they would begin to question my orders, and Voyager would be destroyed because of it._

_No, they will never know how much I ache for human companionship; the simple interaction between two adults who care for one another. Someone I can be an equal with and not have to worry about how what I say or do could affect the ship and crew. I want to be able to be my goddamn self sometimes! Goddamn it! I want to be HOME!_

Computer, delete log entry.

  
  


Captain Kathryn Janeway of the Intrepid Class starship, _Voyager_ , put her face in her hands and cried. The calming breath she had tried to take turned into an involuntary gulp of air, which triggered a stifled sob. _Jesus H. Christ on a cracker! I can’t let myself do this!_

Knuckling the tears of frustration from her eyes, she set her jaw, and stood up from her chair. She shrugged off her uniform tunic, letting it fall to the floor, and donned a pair of paint-stained coveralls over her remaining uniform. The doctor would have fit if he checked the holodeck logs and found that she had not participated in a “relaxing” program. Even if it _was_ exactly what she needed, she would never admit it to him.

As she heard the doors to the holodeck swish shut behind her, the command mask started to fall. Here, the decisions were made for her. Master Leonardo hadn’t steered her wrong yet. He seemed to instinctively, if holograms had instincts, know what medium she needed to use to bring out what was trapped inside of her. Here, she was not the teacher but the student. Here, she could almost forget that she was solely responsible for 141 souls—almost. Here, she could be just Kathryn, if only for a short time. She could barely recognize herself, as simply a woman, when she looked in the mirror. All she saw staring back at her was the Captain. 

Leonardo da Vinci wiped his large hands on his apron and opened his arms wide for his favorite pupil. “Katerina!” he called, his voice echoing in the vast holoprogram of his workshop.

Kathryn adored that he called her by the Italian translation of her name and fell into his arms. He wrapped her in his large arms, hugging her tightly. He noticed immediately that she had lost weight.

“Katerina, you can not afford to lose weight, you are all skin and bones! Come, I will get you something to eat to fatten you up, eh?” His brown eyes twinkled merrily until he got a good look at her. He shook his head disapprovingly. “How long has it been since you have slept? I could pack all of my oils in the baggage under your eyes. After we eat, you sleep.” His tone warned that he would not take no for an answer. Regardless, Kathryn held up a hand to stave off the caretaking.

“Maestro, as much as I would love to eat and sleep, it is more important that I work.”

da Vinci harrumphed and assessed her with the knowing eyes of an artist. He noted, at once, the way her eyes were a haunting shade of gray as if her spark had gone out.e supposed it had. Her soul was drained from her. Her delicate pink lips were set in a hard line, her hands were jammed into the pockets of her coveralls and her shoulders… They carried a heavy burden and a deep pain. He shook his head slowly as if wondering how so much could rest on shoulders so slender. A fury tinged sadness overcame him as he slowly circled her like a predator, taking in every bit of her aura. He made his decision. This was no time to pussyfoot.

When he stood before her again, his eyes were cold… hard.

“Katerina, you are dead inside. Your heart beats because it is too stupida to know it has no life!” He yelled the last word, making Kathryn jump. “You have lost your way.” He shook his head at her sadly.

“Look...,” she started to say.

“Silence!” He yelled, making her jump again. “You are not to speak! Tonight, you listen. The heart, Katerina, the heart is where all life is,” he said as he pounded his hammy fist against his chest. The heart is what defines us,” he made sweeping gestures in the air, “what separates us,” he moved within inches of her face, causing her to instinctively move her head back slightly, “what moves us, and yours has become hardened.” He narrowed his eyes and penetrated her with a harsh look. You think you can not reach out but this is not the case eh? You _don’t_ reach out. You are so concerned with what others think that you have lost the ability to connect!” He brought his hand down on the workbench so hard, she felt it reverberate through her.

He shook his head at her and harrumphed, and then turned and picked up a soft cloth from a nearby workbench folding it lengthwise. “Tonight you work as you live, in darkness!” His voice bellowed loudly enough that she was tempted to cover her ears. He placed the cloth over her eyes and tied it as tightly as he could without causing discomfort and then started to lead her to a table.

“Tonight you will connect with yourself. You do not know what is in your heart anymore because you have ignored it for so long. Tonight you will sculpt the deepest desire of your heart and you will not stop until you are finished. You will know, and I will know, when that time is. You will use your other senses to help you see what you have hidden from yourself.”

Kathryn fumed but did not dare say a word. She was here to work and if that meant doing it blindfolded, so be it. She reached out and touched the table she was led to. She felt the roughness of the edge turning smooth upon the work surface. She reached to her right to find the edge of the copper pot which held the heated water she would need to soften the clay and dipped her hand in, taking note of the way the water slid between her fingers as if she were touching pure silk. The clay was cold and hard yet yielding to her touch and she began, not knowing exactly how to sculpt her deepest desire to return the crew safely to Earth. From the back of the large studio, she heard da Vinci yell, “DON’T THINK! DO!”

Fuming again, she forced down her irritation and cleared her mind while her hands slid over the clay. 

Blindfolded as she was, she didn’t see the stark flash of light that ripped through the holodeck.

She didn’t know how long she had been at it, she only knew her hands were getting waterlogged and sore. She could feel shapes emerging from the clay yet had no idea what they were. She continued on, shaping the clay, dipping her hands in the warm silken water, and shaping the clay some more. Her mind was freed from all thought. It was just her and the clay, just as it was supposed to be. She could hear her hands sliding over the mass before her and could smell the wax of the candles burning. Now and then, she could hear furious brushstrokes as the Master transferred his brilliance to oils and canvas, yet none of those things distracted her. She was so lost in what she was doing, she didn’t hear the first chirp of her combadge. At the second, she slapped her chest so hard she knew it would leave a bruise. Whoever was calling her had better have a damn good reason.

“Janeway here.” She couldn’t keep the irritation out of her voice.

“You are needed in Astrometrics immediately.” Seven said. Her cold tone jolted Janeway as she felt the hair on her neck stand up. She ripped off her blindfold and took her first look at the sculpture she had created. There were four rather oblong shapes, one taller than the other three and two in the front. The two in the back appeared to be in an intimate embrace of sorts while the other two looked up from slightly below them. They were faces to be certain but had no features as of yet. She smiled. She could only surmise, at that point, it was her mother and father, and herself and phoebe as children. The deepest desire of her heart was to be home.

“Computer, save sculpture.”

If Seven of Nine, Tertiary Adjunct of Unimatrix Zero One had been raised by humans rather than by Borg, she would have been pacing. As it was, she stood with her feet slightly apart and her hands clasped behind her back awaiting the arrival of Captain Janeway. When the doors admitted the Captain, Seven immediately ordered the door sealed with Borg encryption codes.

“What’s so important that you had to hail me at 3 o’clock in the morning?” Janeway’s eyes were more gray than blue, an indication that she was less than happy.

Seven was not intimidated in the least. “As you are aware, the long-range sensors in this lab are far more sensitive than those on the bridge. I have discovered something I felt was important enough to wake you. However, I suspect you were not sleeping.”

All irritation fell away as Seven stated the fact so clearly. “You’re right, Seven. I wasn’t sleeping,” she said, with a decidedly gentler tone. “Now, what’s this all about and why did you seal the doors?”

“The answer to your second question will be answered by the first.” Janeway remained quiet, knowing that Seven would soon make her point.

“I increased the range by 2.36 with the extra power you allotted me to try and find suitable mining locations, and found this.” Her fingers flew over her board and brought up an image. Seven ran her nimble fingers over her console, transferring the image to the fore viewscreen. Her efforts were rewarded when she saw the Captain's eyes grow wide and her color drain ever so slightly.

“Are you sure?” Janeway whispered.

Seven jutted her chin out and clasped her hands behind her back. “Although exceedingly rare, I have made… mistakes,” she said as if the word choked her, “from time to time. I have run three diagnostics on the array and have checked the data against Borg algorithms. I am sure.”

While the scientist in Janeway was thrilled, the captain in her remained coolly impassive. 

“How long before the bridge sensors pick this up?” she asked.

“14.8 days at our current speed.”

Janeway ran her fingers through her hair and began to pace as she tried to bring some semblance of order to her racing thoughts. _First things first._

“I want you to launch a class 10 probe without tipping off the bridge crew. Can you do it?”

Seven ran several calculations through her cortical node. “I can re-calibrate the probe’s shielding to match the resonance of the radiation from the surrounding space. It will not be detected.”

Janeway nodded in agreement. “Good thinking, Seven. Do it. When the readings come in, I want you to route the data to the workstation in my quarters. Until then, we'll have to keep this quiet.”

“Understood, Captain.” In other words, Seven agreed with the order she just received. 

“Good. Let's not get our hopes up quite yet.”

Seven cocked her head slightly. “My hopes are at an acceptable level.”

“Good. How are you feeling about all of this?”

Seven stood at attention again. “I am feeling what I believe B'Elanna would call a ‘mixed bag’. On one hand, I am very happy for the crew. On the other hand, I am frightened by the prospect of what may become of me.” Janeway placed her hand on the younger woman’s arm and squeezed reassuringly. “I understand why you may be apprehensive but I assure you, I won’t let anything happen to you.”

Suddenly, Seven felt small. “Do you promise?” 

“Yes, Seven, I promise.” Kathryn gave her arm another reassuring squeeze.

“If I don’t finish my time in the holodeck, the doctor’s going to have my head on a pike. Hail me as soon as the probe data comes in then meet me in my quarters.” 

Kathryn turned on her heel and stalked out of Astrometrics. She could barely feel the deck under her feet as she headed back to the holodeck. She was afraid to hope, there had been too many disappointments, yet she couldn't hold back the inkling that this time might be the one.

“Ah, Katerina! You have returned” Leonardo said with a beaming smile. He clasped his big hands on her upper arms and ushered her back to her work station. “I can see in your eyes something exciting has happened. Take that energy and finish your work.” He flung the cloth from the unfinished sculpture. “Focus, Katerina, focus.”

She started to shake her head and was quickly interrupted by a wave of Maestro da Vinci's hand. 

“Katerina,” he said, gently. “You must still your mind.” He smiled when Kathryn closed her eyes. “Yes, that's it.” His holographic voice was a whisper. He gently guided her hands to the clay, allowing her to re-acclimate to the work she had started. “Excellent, Katerina. Do not allow your mind to interfere with what your heart already knows.” He gently placed the blindfold over her eyes once again.

Kathryn used every bit of Starfleet discipline at her disposal to keep her mind stilled as her hands dipped into the warm water, clawed off another chunk of raw clay, and applied it to her sculpture. She used her thumbs to sweep the clay upward from what she could only gather, was a nose. Her fingers shaped the clay around and down. Back to the bowl, more clay, and more shaping.

She had lost track of how long she’d been at it again.

“Seven of Nine to Janeway.”

“Janeway here,” She said, pulling off the blindfold once more.

“I have the probe data,” Seven said.

Anyone who didn't know Seven very well would have missed it but Kathryn heard fear in the ex-borgs voice and a chill skittered up her back.

“Meet me in my quarters. Janeway out.”

Kathryn took a quick glance at her sculpture before quickly tossing the cover over it. There was definitely more definition. She thought she was starting to see some familiar features emerge and made a mental note to give it some thought later. “Computer, save sculpture and end program.” 

Seven was standing outside her quarters when she arrived, hands clasped behind her back in her customary manner. She dipped her head in greeting before they went inside.

Kathryn motioned Seven to the workstation, “Have a seat and tell me if there's anything to get excited about.” When Seven was seated, her fingers flew rapidly over the keypad as Kathryn went to the replicator. “Whiskey, neat.” She swirled the amber liquid in the glass. “Would you like anything? ”

“No, thank you, Captain,” Seven replied, her eyes never leaving the data stream.

Kathryn downed her drink in one gulp and placed her hand on the back of Seven's chair, leaning in so she, too, could see what was going on. 

“Captain...” her voice was so quiet, it could barely be heard.

“I see it, Seven.” Kathryn's was equally hushed. “This is amazing.”

“Did you detect any neutrino emissions? Thoron radiation? Anything out of the ordinary at all?”

“No, Captain.”

Kathryn keyed in a series of commands and the viewscreen filled with images from the Alpha Quadrant, more to the point, the Milky Way galaxy.

“Seven, is it stable?”

Seven brought up the data. “It doesn't appear to be. While the aperture in this region of space appears to be fixed, readings suggest the exit aperture fluctuates between all four quadrants. It is currently in the inner region of the Oort Cloud.” Seven's fingers keyed in a set of commands, bringing up new data. Seven pointed to a set of numbers. “These readings indicate the aperture remains fixed for approximately 28 days before fluctuating again.” Anticipating the Captain's next question, Seven keyed in a new set of data. “The rate of verteron decay indicates the exit aperture has been at this location for 8 days.”

Janeway straightened up and rubbed the bridge of her nose. “Is it...”

“Yes, Captain. It is stable enough for travel.”

“And how...”

“It would take approximately 3 days at low impulse to reach the Alpha Quadrant.” 

Not anticipating any further questions, Seven stood and clasped her hands behind her back, her version of standing at attention.

Janeway took a deep breath, trying to absorb the information. She slowly brought her eyes up to meet Seven's. “We can go home?” 

Seven swallowed. “Yes, Captain.”

“You're sure?”

“There is a 98.9 percent of success.”

Kathryn started to tremble as she felt the color drain from her face. She didn't feel her legs give out, nor did she hear the wail that filled the air.

Seven rushed forward and caught Kathryn just before she landed in a heap on the deck. She held her much like she had held Naomi Wildman when the child had been upset or frightened. She stroked Kathryn's hair and gently rocked her while Kathryn sobbed in her arms. She felt Kathryn's arms slide around her as the sobs grew louder and more violent. 

As she sought to comfort her captain, she felt a rush of gratitude for her friendship with the only child born on Voyager. If it wasn't for Naomi Wildman teaching Seven how to be more human, she wouldn't have known what to do. In turn, Seven pulled her closer and began whispering a mantra against her ear that Naomi had taught her. “It's okay. I’m here. I have you, Captain. You’re safe with me.”

The sobbing was punctuated by long, shuddering wails and tattered, stuttered breaths as Kathryn disgorged 14 years worth of isolation, loneliness, homesickness, command decisions, loss, and even the hope she was terrified to have. After some time, the weeping slowed to intermittent bursts and shaky sniffles until finally, Seven felt Kathryn's grip on her loosen. They stood there, in each other's arms, for what seemed an eternity.

Kathryn took a deep breath in through her mouth and pulled back, still keeping her arms around Seven. She looked up, expecting to see an icy expression and was pleasantly surprised to see kindness and compassion radiating from the sky blue eyes of Seven of Nine. 

Kathryn gave her a weary, one-sided smile. “I'm sorry about that, Seven,” she said, as she took a step back. “I guess that was a long time coming” She felt a slight blush creep up her neck. It wasn't like her to lose control like that in front of anyone but if it _did_ have to happen, she was grateful it happened in front of Seven.

Seven's voice was quiet, gentle. “Are you operating within acceptable parameters now, Captain?”

Kathryn turned to the coffee table, pulled a tissue from the container there, and unceremoniously blew her nose. “I'm okay now, Seven. Thanks for asking.” She tossed the spent tissue into the recycler and turned to Seven, noticing how unusually pale the young woman was. Janeway placed her hand on Seven's arm. “Are _you_ okay? How are you feeling right now?”

It took Seven several seconds for her to answer. “I am—feeling—frightened.”

Kathryn's eyes clouded over with concern. “Why?”

“Because I am Borg. I have the knowledge of every species we have ever assimilated. Weapons, propulsion, defenses, tactical data. It is all stored in my cortical node. They will,” she choked over the next words, “mutilate me in order to reverse engineer my Borg components so they can integrate Borg technology into more devastating weapons, to bolster Earth defenses...” her throat was suddenly too tight to speak and she felt a shiver run up her spine. 

Kathryn’s face paled. She never considered that possibility. “Well Seven, they can’t do that. You're a human being. Aside from that, you're a Federation citizen.” She couldn’t hide the astonishment, or the horror, in her eyes.

“You are incorrect. My parents didn't want anything to do with the Federation and utilized a little known law to revoke their citizenship. As I was a minor at the time, the same applies to me.” Seven’s eyes darkened.

Kathryn clenched her jaw. “Well, I'm not going to let that happen.

Seven saw the steely glint in Kathryn's eyes. It was the same one she got when they were facing a particularly nasty enemy.

“You will have no choice in the matter if that is what Starfleet intends to do with me.”

She felt herself blanch at the mere suggestion that Starfleet would condone such behavior. “That is not the way Starfleet operates, Seven.”

“Are we speaking of the same Starfleet that operates Section 31 yet denies all knowledge of it, Captain? You forget, the Borg were at Wolf 359. We assimilated Admirals, Captains, and Section 31 operatives. I am privy to information that you are not. That is exactly what they will do with me.”

Janeway felt her knees going weak again and held onto the back of a chair for support. 

“What are you saying Seven?” Her head was spinning.

“I am saying that for all of the ideals Starfleet poses to uphold, there is much more beneath the surface that it does not uphold. Who do you think keeps the ideals of Starfleet looking so pristine on the surface? Section 31 does all of Starfleet’s ‘dirty work’ as B’Elanna would say. They are responsible for the murder of thousands of individuals as well as—”

Kathryn held up her hand. “I can't believe it,” she whispered.

“You don’t have to believe it. The data is stored in my cortical node, I can show you.”

Kathryn shook her head slowly and stumbled into a nearby chair. “Of course, I’ve heard the rumors about Section 31 but I refused to believe them. There was never any proof to back up the claims. Seven, just you having this knowledge puts you in grave danger, let alone the fact you could download and play it. I am ordering you never to reveal knowledge of that information to anyone. Not even me; do you understand?” Janeway choked the words out.

“I understand and I will comply. I can store the information in a redundant area of my cortical node. If I ever need to access it, it will be there. However, I will have no conscious knowledge of it unless it is deemed relevant.”

“Good.” Kathryn nodded her approval. “We have two hours before our shifts start. I want you to go regenerate. I have a feeling we’re going to be very busy over the next couple of weeks.

Seven opened her mouth and was silenced by Kathryn’s upheld hand. “No arguments. At least one of us should be well-rested. I’ll see you later.”

Seven knew better than to challenge her dismissal. She left quietly but not before giving Kathryn a look that let her know she wasn’t happy about it.

Kathryn shrugged out of the coveralls she had been wearing and donned her favorite grey sweatpants. Walking to the replicator, she ordered herself a Whiskey and downed it in one gulp and then ordered another. She had one hour to think before she had to get ready for the Alpha shift. Too much had happened in one day. The emotional dressing down she got from her idol, Leonardo da Vinci, Section 31 being real, and Seven; what _was_ she going to do about Seven? 

Even if someone petitioned to make her a citizen, it could take months, even years. Tuvok could adopt her into his family but there was the question of her age, let alone the long and rigorous process she knew to exist on Vulcan for one to be welcomed into a family. Asylum would take too long as well, unless they could get in touch with a Vulcan ship before reaching Earth. That wouldn’t work either. The Federation would be aware of their hail before they even got near a Vulcan ship. There had to be another way. _Think Kathryn, think! We need to make Seven a citizen of the Federation and quickly. How can I make that happen? What are the ways that people are granted citizenship? Petition, adoption, immigration, marriage. Marriage, that’s it! She has to marry a Federation member of the crew._

Kathryn strode onto the bridge looking unusually haggard. Chakotay gave her a questioning glance as she took her seat in her command chair.

“You okay, Kathryn?”

“I’m just tired, Commander. I haven’t caught up on my sleep yet.”

He nodded his dark head and gave her the early morning report from Beta shift.

“In other words,” she said lightly, “nothing happened.”

He smiled, causing the tribal tattoo over his eye to crinkle. “Exactly.

“You have the bridge, I’ll be in my ready room.”

She caught Seven’s attention and nodded for her to follow, noting that the young woman looked more pale than usual.

“Captain, you wished to see me?”

Kathryn stood at the replicator, rubbing the bridge of her nose. “Coffee, black and strong” 

“I did. I’ve been giving this a lot of thought since you left my quarters this morning and I think I might have a solution.” She said making her way to the sofa on the upper level.

Seven cocked her eyebrow and followed.

“You have to get married. It’s the only way.”

Kathryn didn’t think it was possible for Seven to get any more pale until she actually saw it happening before her very eyes. For the first time in the ten years Seven had been on _Voyager_ , she was speechless. The Captain watched the young former Borg drone stumble to the sofa and sit down. Now she knew it was bad. Seven rarely sat unless asked to do so.

“Seven.” She placed a comforting hand on her shoulder as she sat down beside her. “I have run through every option and all of them take too much time. Marriage to a Federation citizen is the only way to ensure your safety.”

Seven turned her head and muttered, “Who? Who would have me Captain? Look at me.” She said, thrusting her mesh-covered hand in front of the smaller woman and gesturing to the implants above her eye and on her cheek. The glimmer of unshed tears stood out sharply in contrast to her vivid blue eyes.

She gently took Seven’s hand in hers. “Seven, anyone on this crew would be lucky to have you as a wife. If they can’t see how beautiful and brilliant you are, they aren’t worthy of you in the first place. Besides, this would be a marriage in name only, they would have to understand that.”

Seven leveled a cold gaze. “Ever since I saw that book in your quarters, I have been researching romance as you suggested. I have learned that you are correct; it is not irrelevant. B’Elanna says that love is the greatest gift one person can give to another and that marriage is a sacred trust, not to be entered into lightly. The Terran marriage contract is in effect until ‘death do us part’ or until a divorce is granted by a court of law. Although this would be a marriage ‘in name only’ as you have said, I would rather let them torture and dismantle me than subject myself to a lifelong bond with someone who did not care for me, someone I could not trust not to evoke marital rights, and someone I did not care for.”

Kathryn hadn’t thought of any of that; she definitely didn’t think about someone trying to call forth the archaic tradition of the marriage bed. Clearly, Seven had grown more than she had given her credit for and when she put it that way, Kathryn could hardly blame her. She placed her head in her hands and cursed the tears that threatened to spill from her eyes.

“Then, there’s nothing more we can do except hope that Section 31 never gets their hands on you.”

Seven heard something she had never heard before in the Captain’s voice. Defeat. And it made her heart ache. It wasn’t something she ever wished to hear again. 

“Perhaps I was a bit hasty in my assessment, Captain. Did you have someone in mind?”

Janeway left her head in her hands and mumbled a quick, “No.”

“Whoever it is would have to be briefed on the wormhole. That means I would be limited to Senior staff. Tom is already married to B’Elanna, Tuvok is married. Harry Kim and Chakotay seem to be the only viable solutions. If given a choice, I would choose Mr. Kim. He once flirted with me so I know he cares for me, in some regard.”

Kathryn picked her head up and looked at Seven. “You forgot someone.”

“The Doctor is not human,” she said with a haughty lift to her chin.

“He’s not, but I am.”

Seven’s left eyebrow quirked up as high as Kathryn had ever seen it. “You, Captain?”

Feeling slightly insulted, she stood up to be on a semi level basis with the six-foot-tall woman. “Yes, me. What’s so surprising about that?”

Seven blinked rapidly, trying to get her cortical node to start processing information again. “You are female. You are also the Captain of this vessel. All of your previous relationships have been with males. However, we enjoy each other's company and share many common interests. I find you aesthetically pleasing. I especially like your hands, Captain.” 

Kathryn could feel a blush creeping up her neck. “Well, thank you, Seven. I enjoy your company as well and find you... aesthetically pleasing. So, what do you say, will you marry me?”

Seven was stunned that the Captain would make such a sacrifice for her. She was agreeing to a life with her rather than finding a real spouse when they arrived on Earth. Surely she wouldn’t be lacking companionship and could very possibly fall in love. She was sacrificing her future to be with a drone. Captain Janeway had just declared that Seven of Nine was more important to her than her own life. She couldn’t say no.

“Yes, Captain.”

The Captain nodded. “Good. I’m glad that’s settled. There are things we need to talk about and I would rather be comfortable while we do it. Let’s go to my quarters and continue this discussion; we only have a couple of days to pull this off. Oh, and since we’re engaged now, call me by my name, will ya?”

Seven quirked an eyebrow. “But, we are on duty… Kathryn.” Seven expected to see a glimmer of reproach when she tested the use of the Captain’s proper name but she was met with a warm smile.

“Rank has its privileges.” She gave Seven a lopsided grin as she crossed the threshold to the bridge.

“Chakotay, log Seven and me off duty for the day. Emergencies only.”

Seven followed her to the turbo lift and didn’t miss any of the curious glances from the bridge crew before the ‘lift doors swished shut.

Once in her quarters, she excused herself and padded barefoot into the living area wearing a dark blue pair of sweatpants and a white tee shirt. She pulled an extra chair up to her workstation and motioned for Seven to sit down. She pulled up the jewelry database.

“Now, there is the matter of the rings. I’ll need to replicate an engagement ring for you and we will need to look for wedding bands. This needs to seem like it’s been in the planning stages for a long time. There are other things we need to talk about but let’s get this out of the way first.” 

Kathryn opened the first page. 

“My hands must fit in tight places at times when I work in Engineering,” Seven said, pointing to a 2 karat diamond solitaire setting. “This design is inefficient.”

Kathryn nodded. “You’re right, it’d get snagged.” Kathryn narrowed the search parameters to filter out anything with a pronged setting.

“How about something like this?” Kathryn asked, pointing to a page of plain bands.

Seven tilted her head to one side and remained silent for a moment. “They are efficient but plain. You deserve something beautiful.” Seven turned the page and smiled brightly. “Like this.”

“Wow, Seven, that’s gorgeous.” She studied the image of a platinum band with a 1 karat princess cut, channel set diamond with several half karat diamonds on either side, wrapping around approximately half of the band. The band had a V cut on each side of the center stone which gave the appearance of a bezel set. It was paired with a wedding band of channel-set, half karat princess cut diamonds that wrapped the entire band.

“Then, it is decided?” Seven asked, not bothering to hide her excitement.

Kathryn chuckled. “It is decided.” Kathryn took Seven by the hand and led her to the replicator. After sizing their fingers, she ruthlessly overrode the replicator lockout and abused her command privilege, for the first time in her life. Dropping to one knee, she held the ring with the larger stone up to Seven.

“Seven, you have been a dear friend to me and a wonderful companion in our journey through the Delta Quadrant. We have argued, discussed things quietly, been angry with each other, and have forgiven each other. Although these aren’t ideal circumstances, I can promise you that I’m not making this commitment lightly. I will honor you, cherish the friendship we have built and will do my best to be the spouse you deserve. Will you marry me?”

Seven felt warm tears form in her human eye. She had never seen the captain so vulnerable...so...human. She took her hand and gently pulled her to her feet. 

“You don’t have to beg me, Kathryn. I’ve already said yes.” The corners of her lips turned upward and her blue eyes sparkled with moisture.

Kathryn took her by the hand and slipped the ring on her left hand. It stood out in stark contrast against the black mesh. Seven took Kathryn’s ring off of the replicator pad and lowered herself to the deck.

“I have not gotten far enough in my research to know how this is properly done.” A slight blush crept up her alabaster skin. She reached for Kathryn’s left hand, taking it into her own. “I accept your proposal of marriage and say this to you. I lack sufficient data on everything a spouse should be but you are my friend, even when you must be my Captain. You are always there for me when I need to have a philosophical discussion, aside from when you are dealing with a crisis. I have often disturbed your sleep cycle, yet you have never ‘kicked me out on my ass’ as B’Elanna Torres has said she would if I ever woke her ‘in the dead of night.’”

Kathryn tossed her head back and laughed, feeling tears tickling the backs of her eyes.

Nonplussed, Seven continued. “You have always treated me as an individual, except when ordering me to do something I did not want to do. Although I do not currently understand all it means to be a good spouse to you, I will research it thoroughly and endeavor to excel in my role.”

Seven slipped the ring onto Kathryn’s slender finger, curious as to how a hand that looked so delicate could command with such power, and equally, show such tenderness, and stood, clasping her hands behind her back. She smiled when she met the beaming blue eyes of her fiance. 

Kathryn stood there, amazed at how far the young woman had come in such a short time. Feeling entirely too warm she cleared her throat and gestured toward the sofa.

“Thank you, Seven. That was a lovely proposal acceptance,” she said, as she curled herself at one end of the sofa. Seven sat at the other corner.

“Now that that’s taken care of, there are other things to discuss. In many ways, this is similar to a covert operation.” 

Seven nodded. “I understand, Kathryn.” Aside from the Section 31 data, she was familiar with roles that must be established for a covert mission. Oftentimes, operatives were given packets of information to study ranging from the false name they would go by to the persona’s favorite color. It would be vital to her, and Kathryn’s safety, to ensure the ruse looked completely genuine.

“We’ll need to convince the crew that we have been quietly dating for quite some time and have decided to make our relationship, and subsequent engagement, public, so we’ll need to get our stories straight.”

“I understand.”

“So, when did we start dating?” Kathryn had a small smile on her face. Dating Seven. She wondered when those two words started to sound so wonderful together.

Seven tilted her head and accessed her eidetic memory, trying to come up with the perfect time frame. “That would depend, Kathryn. How long have we been able to keep this a secret?”

Kathryn nodded. “Good point. Let’s say we’ve been able to keep this under wraps for a year.”

“In that case, we started dating immediately after shore leave on planet 453.3 went awry and you were injured.”

“Good one, Seven.” Kathryn suppressed a shudder. “I still have nightmares about that black goo slamming me around.”

“I am sorry you still have frightful images of that, Kathryn.”

“Thank you, Seven. As I recall, that thing broke both of my legs and the doctor ordered bed rest for several days while my muscles recovered.”

“You are correct. You refused to stay in sickbay and the only way the doctor would release you was if you had a ‘babysitter’.”

Kathryn gave her a bright smile. “I remember. He threatened to pull rank on me if I didn’t agree. I think he thought he would be the one to do it. I’ll never forget the look on his face when you offered. I thought his photons were going to explode.” Kathryn laughed.

“You were very difficult to contend with. You refused to stay in bed until I told you I would inform the doctor if you disobeyed his orders again.”

Kathryn’s eyes narrowed in mock anger. “I’m a starship Captain, I didn’t like being carried around my quarters every time I wanted to get out of bed.”

“Nonetheless, you were carried, and that is when I fell in love with you.” Seven’s expression suddenly became very shy.

If Kathryn hadn’t known it was all a ruse, she would have believed Seven just told her an amazing truth.

“Seven?” she asked quietly. “Is that when I fell in love with you, too?” Seven couldn’t look at her. She simply nodded her head.

“Okay. It’s settled then. We began dating shortly after that.” Seven still couldn’t look at her. 

“Do you need a break? We can take some time, gather our thoughtsㅡ”

“You may proceed.” Seven said, still averting her eyes.

“Okay. There are things that engaged couples do that we’ll have to get used to doing until it feels commonplace.”

That brought Seven’s head around. She stared in disbelief at the woman seated beside her. 

Kathryn put both hands up in front of her. “Woah, Seven, I’m not talking about sex. I’m talking about hand-holding and other innocuous affectionate gestures.”

Kathryn couldn’t be sure, but she thought she saw a flash of disappointment in Seven’s eyes before she activated her stoic Borg demeanor. _Curious…_

“The Borg were not affectionate. You are the only adult, aside from the doctor, who ever touches me on a regular basis. B’Elanna sometimes places her arm around me but it’s only after she’s had ‘one too many’ and can no longer walk straight.”

Kathryn resisted the urge to roll her eyes and belayed the urge to have a talk with her Chief Engineer. She couldn’t go around policing everything her crew did. If they needed to let their hair down once in a while, so be it, as long as it didn’t jeopardize the crew, Voyager or innocent civilians. Realizing how little human contact Seven had had since being on Voyager truly made her heart hurt. She never considered how incredibly lonely it must be for her. She scooted closer to the beautiful woman and placed a warm hand on her thigh. “I’m truly sorry, Seven. I never realized…”

Seven swallowed the lump that was forming in her throat. Kathryn scooted back into the corner of the sofa hiking one leg up along the back while keeping the other on the ground. “Seven, scoot over and lean your back against me.”

Seeing the look of confusion in her eyes, she patted the spot in front of her. “We’re going to have our first innocuous gesture.”

Seven did as she was asked and slowly leaned her back against the smaller woman, not allowing herself to fully relax, afraid she may hurt the smaller woman. One wouldn’t know it to look at her but she had a considerable amount of weight due to her Borg enhanced skeletal structure and implants. Kathryn wrapped her arms around her waist and rested her head on Seven’s shoulder.

“I am not sure what I am supposed to do now, Kathryn.” Seven felt Kathryn’s facial muscles contract and suspected she was smiling. She had been doing a lot of that lately. More, she realized, than she had ever before.

“You’re not supposed to _do_ anything, honey. You just relax and enjoy being held.” 

Seven swallowed. “Do you enjoy being held like this?”

“Mmmhumm, yes, I do.”

Seven sat up, turning her body toward Kathryn. “I can not picture you doing anything like this.”

A sadness darkened her eyes to gray. “That’s because you’ve always seen me as your Captain. I’m more than my rank, Seven, but the entire time we’ve been lost out here, I haven’t been able to _be_ anything _but_ the Captain.”

“And now, are you ready to be more?”

“I’m more than ready, Seven.”

Seven mimicked Kathryn’s pose and opened her arms to her as Kathryn had done only moments ago. Somehow, she knew it was exactly what was needed. She wrapped her arms around her as she snuggled against her back and embraced the strong, powerful Captain, covering her arms with her own and pulling them tightly against her midsection.

“Tell me more, Kathryn.”

“I’ve ached to be held like this,” she said quietly. “There have been so many times, especially lately, that I’ve really missed having someone to come home to.”

Seven instinctively pulled her closer. “I am here now, Kathryn. You need never be alone again.” When she heard soft sobs and felt the petite body shaking in her arms, she knew holding Kathryn was the right thing to do.

“Thank you, Seven.”

“You are welcome.”

Kathryn allowed her command mask to fall away completely as she allowed herself to be cradled in the strong arms of her Seven of Nine. She closed her eyes and let her head fall back against the waiting shoulder and snuggled it gently under Seven’s chin. Subconsciously, her hands gently caressed the arms she was so grateful to be in. She slowly became aware of the soft breasts she was so loving cradled against and felt a tingle rush through her body. She could hear the strong, steady heart beating a tattoo in her ear, lulling her to sleep… and she let it.


	2. Part 2 - Finding Home

Seven was aware of an ache between her legs as soon as Kathryn settled back against her. It was a pleasant sensation, not completely unfamiliar to her. She had felt it before on various occasions. She searched her memory and found that every single time, Kathryn had been present. Until now, it had been largely ignored but the continual pressure against that particular region made it impossible. She wondered what might happen if she raised her hips slightly. She could tell by the deep, even breathing that Kathryn had fallen asleep. Determined to be careful not to wake her, she experimented with the sensation and felt the ache become more intense. She pushed her hips forward again, being ever so careful not to disturb the woman in her arms. She felt her heart rate and breathing increase as the ache quickly began to feel more like a need. Unsure of what to do, she opted to remain still, given that if she continued, Kathryn may wake up. She knew she hadn’t been sleeping well, so she directed her nanoprobes to quench the arousal. She sighed in disappointment when her body returned to normal, hoping there would be another opportunity to explore the new sensations.

Kathryn’s back was way too warm and was she sitting up? She didn’t recall sitting in her recliner the night before. As she slowly regained consciousness, she remembered. She was being cradled by Seven. She stretched her back slightly and sat up fully, her back missing the warmth of the body behind her. She raised her arms above her head and made a long guttural noise as she stretched the rest of her muscles. She almost came out of her skin when she heard Seven tell her good morning.

“I didn’t mean to startle you, Kathryn.”

She stood up and finished stretching, a lazy smile curling her lips. “Good morning to you, too. How long have I been asleep?” She padded to the replicator. “Coffee. Black.”

“8.49 hours.”

Her eyebrows slammed into her forehead. “I haven’t slept that long in… well, I don’t remember how long.”

Seven stood up and mimicked the stretching action she had seen Kathryn do. She was surprised to hear similar vocalizations come unbidden out of her mouth. 

“Feels good, doesn’t it. Why did you let me sleep on you so long?” She asked, taking a sip of her coffee.

“Yes, and because I know you haven’t been sleeping well. It was illogical to wake you when I was perfectly content to hold you.”

She smiled. “You were? Didn’t you get uncomfortable?”

A faint blush colored her cheeks as she thought of the uncomfortable ache she had to use her nanoprobes to subdue. “Yes, and yes, but I am Borg. I adapted.”

“That’s good to know. Excuse me for a second.”

Kathryn emptied her bladder, washed her hands and brushed the fuzz off of her teeth. She checked the chronometer… 4 hours to go before Alpha shift.

Unsure what to do with herself, Seven pulled up the probe data and confirmed the readings again. Kathryn walked up behind her and placed her hands on her shoulders.

“Is this another innocuous affectionate gesture, Kathryn?”

“It is.”

“You may proceed.”

Kathryn leaned down and wrapped her arms around Seven’s chest and gave her a long hug.”

“This is acceptable. I am enjoying these affectionate gestures.”

“I’m glad. Is there anything new in the data?”

As she rested her cheek against the side of Seven’s face, Seven reached up a free hand and placed it over Kathryn’s.

“No.”

“There’s more we need to talk about before our shifts today.” She said, as she slid her hand from under Seven’s and straightened up.

Seven crossed the room and sat down on the sofa while Kathryn grabbed her coffee mug and joined her.

“We’ve covered a lot of ground in a short amount of time. Do you have anything you would like to talk about or any questions you would like to ask?” Kathyrn subconsciously fiddled with the new ring on her finger, not accustomed to it being there yet. Even when she was engaged before, she hadn’t worn a ring. This felt totally different. Perhaps it was because it wasn’t a real marriage, or perhaps it was just because Seven was so completely honest. It was impossible for the Borg to have ulterior motives or spin lies. She knew Seven would never lie to her or hurt her out of spite like a couple of other people had. When she was finished with an argument, she didn’t carry the pain around with her by a handle. She simply let it go. It was the most astounding thing Kathyrn had ever seen.

She patiently waited for a reply while Seven assumed her ‘thinking’ pose, head cocked to one side and eyes pointed to the upper left of their sockets.

“I have often seen Tom and B’Elanna holding hands in the corridors, as well as various temporary couples. I have also witnessed them with their arms around each other and kissing. Will we be required to do those things?”

Kathryn suppressed a small smile. “Holding hands and having our arms around each other in the corridors seems like it would be appropriate for us when I’m off duty, if that’s something you want to do. However, even if this was a real engagement and marriage, I wouldn’t kiss you in front of the crew. That’s a very private thing for me. It also wouldn’t be very seemly for a Captain to make out with her wife anywhere she damn well pleased, no matter how beautiful she was or how much she wanted to.” Kathryn suddenly felt a lump rise up in her throat and nervously cleared it. 

She could see that Seven was confused. “Do you remember when we talked last night about me being more than my rank?”

“Of course I do, I have an eidetic memory.” Her tone was a bit sharper than she intended it to be.

“For us to be seen kissing, anywhere on  _ Voyager _ , would be showing the crew that I am vulnerable.”   
  
“I fail to understand how kissing someone makes you vulnerable.”

Kathryn lifted her eyebrows and smiled. “That’s because you haven’t experienced it yet.”

Seven knitted her brows together. “Yet? Do you intend to kiss me?”

She rubbed the bridge of her nose, suddenly feeling way too warm. “It’s part of the wedding ceremony. A kiss to seal our vows.” She had never considered kissing Seven, but now that it was hanging in the air like a lead elephant, she let her eyes wander over the classic Scandanavian features. The round eyes, the oceanic color of her irises, down her straight nose and to those incredibly full lips. She felt a spark of desire and knew, under ordinary circumstances, Seven of Nine could be dangerous to her. Had she felt this spark of attraction when Seven was a member of her crew, it could have been torturous for her to deny it. As it was, however, it was completely appropriate for her to feel a spark of desire for her soon-to-be spouse. She swallowed her awkwardness and looked deeply into the uncertain eyes of her fiance. 

She raised herself up onto her knees and shuffled closer to Seven, who was now looking at her with a mixture of uncertainty and curiosity. “We should practice this as well, until it’s no longer awkward.” She gently reached out and cupped Seven’s cheek, not prepared for the rush of emotion the touch provoked, and drew her closer. She closed her eyes, took a calming breath, and gently pressed her lips on Seven’s mouth.

Seven had never felt anything as wonderful. She glided her hand over Kathryn’s cheek, down to her neck and around until she cupped the back of her neck, gently drawing her closer. Driven by something she didn’t understand, she opened her mouth slightly and encompassed Kathryn’s lower lip, reveling in the velvety texture. She felt Kathryn’s mouth open a little wider and was pleasantly surprised to feel her tongue softly asking for permission to enter. Seven granted it by sliding her tongue along Kathryn’s, eliciting a low moan from the ‘tough as nails’ Captain. 

Kathryn, feeling bolder, deepened the kiss and pulled Seven to her more roughly than she intended to. It had been a long time, after all. As their tongues tasted each other, her breathing started to get faster. She swirled her tongue around the younger woman’s and felt, rather than heard a groan come from deep within her. A little voice in her head told her to stop. She told it to go fuck itself. 

Seven didn’t want to stop, but with so many questions and new sensations bombarding her, she gently broke the kiss. She brought a shaky hand to her lips, wondering how utilitarian body parts could bring so much pleasure. Searching her cortical node, she began to cross-reference her reactions. Her heart rate and respiration had increased, her body tingled in some places more than others, her nipples felt tight and there was an ache between her legs. All of the signs pointed to one thing… 

Kathryn’s eyes stayed shut for a moment, the expression on her face was one of pleasure, desire, and utter disappointment that the kiss had ended so soon. Seven worked to steady her breathing as Kathryn opened her eyes, now shaded a dark blue and filled with the heat of desire.

“I think I understand now, why you would not want to reveal this part of yourself in front of the crew, nor would I ever want you to,” she said, still breathless.

“Why wouldn’t you want me to, Seven?” she asked in a husky breath, curiosity coloring her tone.

“Because I want that look to be reserved only for me,” she said quietly.

Kathryn was convinced that if it wasn’t for her rib cage holding it in place, her heart would have leapt right out of her chest. Afraid Seven may notice, she clasped her hands together and tried to still the tremble in them. She had never been so shaken by a mere kiss before. 

“I can’t say I would be happy to share the look in your eyes with the crew either.” She gently teased, making Seven blush.

“As much as I would like to continue this discussion, we both need to get ready for our shifts. I’m going to announce our engagement at this morning’s staff meeting.” The tone of command had come back into her voice. Seeing the questioning look on Seven’s face, she lifted her eyebrows in the silent question of, “what”?

“Since this is something that concerns us both, do you think I should have a say in the decision?”

Kathryn’s face hardened for a moment as she considered informing Seven that she was still the captain and could do whatever the hell she damn well wanted to.

Seven knew exactly what Kathryn was thinking as soon as she saw her eyes take on the steely glint she was so familiar with. She had seen it time and time again in some of their more heated arguments and every time Kathryn faced off against someone in battle. She had steeled herself for the battle she was sure was coming, when the moment passed and Kathryn’s eyes softened.

“Of course, you’re right. I’m afraid it’s going to take some time for me to get used to being in a relationship again. As your Captain, I can’t run command decisions up the flagpole, even if they pertain to us.”

“According to my research, marriage is supposed to be an equal partnership. Wouldn’t there be a difference between running the ship and trying to run our relationship, Kathryn? I believe I was within my authority to ask to be consulted about when to announce that we are embarking on our...covert mission.”

“Indeed, you were. I’ve never been married before but I know how to run a ship. It may take some time for me to learn how to navigate a relationship.” She gave her a lopsided grin.

“We will navigate this together and I will remind you when I require a say in decision making regarding our relationship.”

“Of that, my soon-to-be wife, I have no doubt.”

B’Elanna was the first to notice something amiss by the way the Captain and Seven kept looking at each other and smiling, almost as if they knew something she didn’t. She also noticed that neither one of them were resting their hands on top of the table the way they normally did. When Tom came into the conference room and sat beside his wife, she asked if he had noticed anything different about them. He shook his head.

Chakotay was the last to enter and took his regular seat to the left of Janeway.

“Okay people, let’s get started. Who has something new to report?”

As they were currently traversing an unremarkable area of space, no one spoke up. Janeway looked pointedly at her senior officers. “Engineering, what’s our status.?”

B’Elanna didn’t have to look at the PADD perched on the table. “Engineering is at 98.6 efficiency. The warp core is humming, the gel packs are stabilized, and all's right with the world.”

Janeway gave her a force one ‘look’. “Thank you, Lieutenant, for that rousing interpretation.” 

Each department reported the same, sans the announcement of the state of the world. She turned her attention back to Neelix.

“Since there’s nothing further, Mr. Neelix, I would like for you to plan a party of sorts.”

The colorful Talaxian sat up straight and beamed. “Of course, Captain. I’ve been just itching to do something special for the crew, what with all that trouble with the J’akarians and then the engines needing to be fixed. The crew could use something to cheer them up. What’s the occasion?”

Janeway glanced at Seven and smiled. “Seven? Will you do the honors, please?”

Seven lifted the corners of her mouth slightly and dipped her head toward the captain. “Yes, Captain,” she replied, as she brought her left hand out from under the table.

“I require you all to admire this newly acquired piece of jewelry.”

Janeway stifled the belly laugh that wanted to erupt when she saw everyone’s eyebrows slam into their hairlines and their jaws flop open. She couldn’t help but think they all looked remarkably like P’fluzian Watahfuk fish, although it was properly pronounced wah-TAH-fick, the crew called them the what-the-fuck fish because that was usually the first thing to come to mind when seeing one for the first time. She could never tell anyone, but she thought it was hilarious. Glancing over at Seven, even she looked like she was having a hard time keeping a straight face, which only made it harder to keep herself under control.

Everyone was too shocked to speak. Intellectually, they all knew what a diamond worn on that finger signified, but it didn’t make any sense. Chakotay looked at B’Elanna. B’Elanna looked at Tom. Tom looked at Harry. Harry looked at Neelix. Neelix looked at the doctor. The doctor scowled at the Captain. Tuvok quirked an eyebrow and then all looked at Janeway. 

She slowly brought her left hand from under the table, just as Seven had done, and watched to see who understood it first. She was having far too much fun and was happy Seven had suggested such a devious way to inform the senior staff. She supposed she had B’Elanna’s influence to thank for it. 

“It would seem, Captain, that congratulations are in order,” Tuvok said.

All over the room, all Janeway could hear was, “Whathuhwhatthehellwaitaminutewoahnofreakinwayyou’rekiddingsincewhen?”

She held up an elegant hand to still the chorus and looked at Seven. “You were right, I owe you twenty ration slips.” She gave Seven an exaggerated wink to show the staff she was kidding. 

“All joking aside, I’ll answer your questions. Seven and I have been dating for some time now and last night I asked her to marry me. She said yes. We want this to happen as soon as possible. How soon can you have the arrangements made, Mr. Neelix?”

He was stunned. He knew the two of them shared a bond but he never saw this one coming. “Uh…I…uh…2 weeks, Captain.”

She forced back a smile at the stunned looks on everyone’s faces. “Make it 2 days and you’re on, Mr. Neelix,” she continued before the Talixian had the chance to object. “Chakotay, as you will be acting Captain on that day, you will perform the ceremony. Seven and I will write our own vows. Tuvok,” she softened her tone, “will you stand up for me, old friend?”

The Vulcan never missed a beat. “It would be my honor, Captain.”

“Seven?” Janeway smiled full tilt at her bride to be and Seven felt her head swim for a moment.

“I choose B’Elanna to stand up for me. Do you accept, Klingon?” 

B’Elanna, for her part, was still looking like that P’fluzian Watahfuk fish the way her mouth kept opening and closing. “Uh…yeah…I guess so, Seven.” Seven knew the Engineer was in a deep state of shock because otherwise, she would have bantered back by calling her “Borg” instead of by her designation.

“Good. Now that that’s settled, you’re all dismissed. Seven, would you stay for a moment please?”

“If I may, Captain... what’s the rush?” Neelix asked.

“I do not want her to change her mind, Mr. Neelix.” Seven responded before Kathryn could. Judging by the gleam in Kathryn's eyes and the way she was biting the inside of her cheeks, she wouldn’t have put it past her to announce one of them was ‘knocked up’ simply to see if any of them would pass out.

Neelix stood up, clapped his hand together, and said, “Well, then, I have a lot to do. I better get busy.” He shook the Captain’s hand and then patted Seven on the shoulder, offering them a hearty congratulations. Once her senior staff had followed Neelix’s example, they all shuffled out of the room, still too stunned to form coherent sentences. 

Once they were alone, Janeway let loose with a peel of laughter, and even Seven joined in.

“Kathryn that was, as B’Elanna would say, ‘way too priceless’.”

That set off another round of guffaws from the usually stoic and dignified Captain. When she gained control of herself again, she wrapped her arm around Seven’s waist and replied, “Yes, it was. I thought B’Elanna was gonna pass out.”

“It’s regrettable you don’t have an eidetic memory. I think that’s a moment I will replay.”

Seven wrapped her arm around Kathryn’s shoulder, as she had seen Tom do with B’Elanna on a number of occasions, and walked out of the conference room, dropping their arms from each other as they stepped onto the bridge.

She couldn't help but follow Seven with her eyes as she got on the turbo lift and headed to Astrometrics. She nodded as she walked past Chakotay, effectively handling the bridge over to him. “I’ll be in my ready room.”  _ Waiting for the onslaught to begin.  _

The entrance chirp sounded.

“Well, that didn’t take long,” she mumbled. 

“Come.”

Chakotay took a seat before being asked, which irked Janeway from the get-go. “Commander.” She greeted coolly.

“Captain, I had no idea.” The big bear of a man rubbed the tribal tattoo over his left eye as he shifted uncomfortably in his seat.

Kathryn leveled a force 5 glare at him. “No one did, Commander. We had our reasons for keeping this quiet.”

“But Kathryn, of all the people that should have been informed… ”

She casually leaned back in her chair as she ramped the level 5 glare up to a level 8. “All of the people who should have been informed were informed. Namely, Seven and myself. You’re dismissed.” The whip of command in her voice nearly sliced the big man in two.

“Yes, Ma’am.” He rose sheepishly, understanding he had just crossed the line with his Captain.

The next to follow was Lieutenant Tuvok. “Come!” she barked when the chirp sounded. She didn’t mean for it to come out as harshly as it did.

“Captain, I wish you good fortune on your upcoming nuptials. I can only wish for you to be as successful in your marriage as I and T’Pel are.”

Kathryn smiled. “Thank you, old friend. I hope I didn’t surprise you too much.”

“You did not. I am gratified that you finally realized the futility of continuing this journey without the benefit of a spouse to support you. The only surprise is that it did not happen sooner.”

“What do you mean?” She knitted her brows in curiosity.

“I have been aware that you and Seven have developed a special bond between you. I have long suspected it had the potential to develop into a romantic relationship under certain conditions.” Seeing the question written on her face, he continued. “The conditions would be, Kathryn, if you stopped hiding behind the illogical rationale that Starfleet prohibits relationships between consenting adults. There is no such regulation. Nor does Starfleet prohibit officers of differing ranks to serve together. At best, it is merely frowned upon.” 

Her eyes narrowed. “And the other?” Not entirely sure she wanted to hear his answer, considering he had called upon their long-standing friendship when he called her by her name.

“If you let go of the illogical need to punish yourself for, as you say, stranding us in the Delta Quadrant, and allow yourself to have the happiness you deserve.”

She swallowed and let his words sink in. She cleared her throat and willed her voice not to shake. “You’re right, old friend. If I didn’t know better, I would say those insights of yours were positively human.”

He raised an eyebrow. “I realize what I said may have provoked you to examine yourself but there is no need to insult me. What will you require of me as your best man?”

Kathryn chuckled. “Just get me to the church on time, Tuvok.”

And the fun continued. Harry Kim muttered a quick congratulations. B’Elanna Torres wanted to make sure her intentions were honorable. Neelix begged for more time to arrange a proper wedding and reception. Even the Doctor made an appearance. Tom Paris resisted the urge to clap her on the shoulder and issued a beaming congratulations, along with the information that she was a  _ very _ lucky woman; she doubted very much that B’Elanna would have appreciated the way his eyebrows were waggling as he said it. By the time the stream finally came to an end, she was nearly exhausted. However, there was one more piece of business.

Computer, open a ship-wide channel. 

“Attention all hands. This is your Captain. Before the rumor mill circulates too widely, I wish to announce that Seven of Nine has agreed to be my wife. The ceremony will take place two days from now and will be open to anyone not on duty. For those of you on duty, the ceremony will be broadcast on a ship-wide channel. Thank you all in advance for your well wishes on our upcoming nuptials. Janeway out.”

“Janeway to Seven.”

“Seven here, Captain.”

“Can you meet me in my quarters after your shift please?”

“Certainly, Captain.”

“Thank you. Janeway out.”

Tal Celes’ eyes almost fell out of her head when she heard the ship-wide announcement. 

“Holy crap, Seven, you’re marrying the Captain!?”

Seven never turned her head from her board. “Yes.”

“I didn’t even know you two were dating!”

Seven’s fingers continued to fly over the panel. “I am aware that certain individuals choose to share their dating experiences with everyone on board, however, Kathryn and I respect each other’s wishes regarding privacy.” Seven supposed the Captain would forgive the use of her proper name given the circumstance. 

Not only did the Bajoran’s eyes almost fall out over the announcement, but it also looked like she was going to have apoplexy over hearing Seven call the Captain by her given name.

Celes gulped. “Of course, Seven. I never meant to pry. I’m happy for you, really. I just never thought of the Captain as a person before and to hear she’s getting married...wow!”

That declaration brought Seven to a halt and she turned around to face the small Bjoran. “I do not understand. Kathryn is clearly a person. Why should she not participate in the tradition of marriage?” She cocked her head and studied Celes intently.

The young girl suddenly wished she hadn’t said anything at all. “Well, she’s the Captain!”

“Explain.”

Celes took a deep breath and tried to make sense of her thoughts. “Well, she's bigger than life, superhuman. I guess it never occurred to me that she would have the same needs as the rest of us.”

Seven raised her eyebrow. “Captain Janeway’s stature will be in no way diminished by our marriage. As for her needs, I will satisfy as many as are humanly possible. She will still be… bigger than life and superhuman. She will still be your Captain.”

Seven watched as a blush crept up the face of the Bjoran. “Why do you find that embarrassing, Ensign?”

“OhlookatthetimeSevenIhavetoreporttoanywhereelseseeyoutomorrow.” Then, the Bjoran ran out of Astrometrics, trying desperately to shake the image out of her head of Seven satisfying the Captain’s ‘needs.’”

Seven filed that away to ask Kathryn about. 

“Torres to Seven”

“Seven here.”

“Uh, can you meet me in my office?”

“When?”

“Now!”

“On my way, Seven out.” As she made her way to Engineering, several people took the time to shake her hand or clap her on the back, a few congratulated her on ‘a nice catch.’ During her time on Voyager, she had saved the ship on more than one occasion and had saved various crew members to one degree or another. No one congratulated her for those things. Now that she was getting married, it was if the crew were seeing her with new eyes. She was no longer a mindless automaton to them; she was a person capable of love and being loved. She never really comprehended the depth of her loneliness until she started feeling the warmth from the crew. Not all crewmembers were happy, however. She heard a few bitter remarks about how she had probably assimilated the captain into compliance. She disregarded them as irrelevant and continued to enjoy the feeling of, finally, being part of the Voyager family.

B’Elanna was pawing through a stack of PADDs on her desk when Seven rounded the corner into her office. The stout engineer immediately wrapped the Borg in a bone-crushing hug and patted her on the back, hard. “Congratulations, you sneaky bitch!” She beamed.

“Thank you, petaQ,” she replied with a small smile.

“Honestly though, Borg, how in the fuckity fuck fuck did you keep this quiet? I never even suspected you were knocking boots with the Captain!”

“Surely, you are aware by now, Klingon, that I do not wear boots.”

“Kahless on a shit stick, Seven, we’ve talked about you being so literal. Loosen up, expand that cortical node,” she said as she tapped her finger on Seven’s forehead. “Knocking boots, you know...doin the nasty, lickin’ the splits,” she jokingly poked her in the side with her elbow while she emphasized the idioms with exaggerated gestures, “the ‘ole pants-off dance-off, ‘tippin the velvet―”

“You are referring to copulation.”

“Yeah!” she said, grinning and flashing her eyebrows, “I can’t believe you didn’t tell me, we’re friends, aren’t we?

“Yes, B’Elanna. We are friends, however, there are some things that people want to keep private, although, I understand you aren’t one of them.” She gave her a nudge.

The feisty Klingon looked hurt. “Pft, okay, okay. I get it. So, what do you need for me to do for you for the wedding?”

“I… don’t know.” She hadn’t researched the role of a best man or maid of honor; she never thought she would need one. She never dared to dream that anyone would ever see her for more than a ‘filthy Borg’ or ‘mindless automaton’, except Kathryn. She had always been able to see past her ugly face and scarred body.

“No problem. I guess I should throw you a bachelor party or something but it’ll have to be tonight. Are you free?”

She started to say ‘yes’ and then remembered her conversation with Kathryn earlier that morning. “I’ll check to see if Kathryn has plans for us tonight and get back to you.”

“Sounds good.” B’Elanna tossed her arm around Seven’s shoulder as she walked her toward the door of the Engineering department. “Now, let’s talk about the kiss at the end of the ceremony―”

  
  


Kathryn was never so grateful to finally be in her quarters. She kicked her boots off, changed into her favorite sweats, replicated herself a whiskey, and collapsed on the sofa.

She was a bit irritated when the chime to her door sounded.

“Come!” She barked.

Seven of Nine stepped into the room and eyed her curiously.

Kathryn let out a sigh of relief. “Oh, it’s you. I was afraid you were another one of the senior staff coming to give me a lecture on propriety or tell me how I’d better treat you right or get shoved out of an airlock,” she said dryly.

Using a phrase she had heard at various times around the ship, Seven asked, “You’ve had a rough day?” She sat down beside Kathryn and put her arm around her shoulder. “Is this the appropriate response?”

Kathryn snuggled closer, turned her body into Seven, and slid her hand around the blond’s narrow waist. “Yes, it’s appropriate. It wasn’t a horrible day as much as it was draining...and exhilarating.”

“I believe I understand. I, too, have had that experience today. Do you have any plans for us tonight?”

“I don’t think so, why do you ask?” Curiosity colored her tone.

“B’Elanna wants to throw me a bachelor party tonight.”

Kathryn leaned back with surprise written all over her face. “I guess that's what you get for picking a Klingon to stand up for you.” 

“You are teasing me. I can tell by the way your eyes sparkle.” She got a lopsided grin in response.

“Go ahead and have fun, honey. I’m exhausted and will probably turn in early. Do you need to regenerate tonight?”

“Yes, I missed my cycle last night.”

“That was my fault.”   
  
“No, Kathryn, it was my choice to hold you. Why did you ask about my regeneration cycle?”

“I wanted to know if I needed to give you the code to the door tonight or not.”

“I don't understand. Why would I need the code to the door?”

“I guess we haven’t discussed this yet. We’ll be living together once we’re married.” Kathryn said, contemplating the changes to come.

“I meant that I don’t need a code because I can override the locking mechanism.”

That made Kathryn chuckle. “I should have known. You’ve never had your own quarters and I’ve never lived with anyone before.”

Seven was equally as surprised as she was gratified. “I am the first one you are going to cohabitate with? You have been engaged twice in your life.”

A touch of sadness crept in as she thought of Justin Tighe, the first man she was engaged to, and she couldn't think of him without thinking of her father. They had both drowned during a shuttle test flight the three of them had taken. Kathryn was thrown clear of the wreckage but her father and fiance had both been trapped as the shuttle sunk beneath an iceberg. In the end, she couldn’t choose which one to save and ended up losing them both. She still had occasional nightmares about it.

“Justin and I were both young and thought we had all the time in the world. We didn’t see any reason to rush into living together, and Mark...I guess I just never got around to it with him. I had roommates at the academy but aside from that, I think I’ve always preferred having my own space.” She sighed and snuggled a little closer.

“Is this what is meant by ‘enjoy your last days of freedom while they last’?”

Kathryn sat up and looked at Seven. “I suppose it is, where did you hear that?”

“Ensign Hickman. I think that was his way of congratulating me.” oh Hickman!

“How soon do you need to meet with B’Elanna?”

“Unknown. I told her I would see if you had made plans for us before giving her my answer.”

“That was very considerate of you. You can use the commlink if you like, after all, these are essentially your quarters now too.”

“Thank you, Kathryn. This will take some getting used to.”

“For both of us,” Kathryn replied. She had no idea what sharing her quarters was going to be like but she realized a part of her was looking forward to finding out.

“Seven to B’Elanna.”

“Torres here.”

“I am free tonight.”

“Great, meet me in the mess hall in an hour. Torres out.”

“So, aside from your visit with B’Elanna, how was your shift?”

“Eventful. Tal Celes displayed behavior that I found confusing.”

“What happened, darling?”

Seven smiled at the practiced use of endearments. “She stated that she never imagined you as a person before. How could she not? Clearly you are human.”

Janeway chuckled. “It’s called the Captain Syndrome. Crew members rarely ever see their Captain as a mere person. To them, we are always the Captain. Intellectually, they know we eat and sleep just like they do. We laugh and cry, mourn, use the facilities, and so on but,” she paused, “they never really see the person behind the rank. Trust me Seven, that’s not a bad thing. If the crew saw me as a person rather than their Captain, they might start to doubt my ability to lead them or start to wonder about my command decisions. That may lead to them following only the orders they choose to follow, and the entire chain of command would break down. As a person, I am just as flawed and full of self-doubt as anyone else. As a Captain, I am superhuman or bigger than life.”

“Those are exactly the terms Celes used.”

“Of course they are. That’s what makes me a great leader, Seven. I inspire confidence, which in turn fosters trust, which in turn fosters loyalty.”

Seven’s lips curled up ever so slightly.

“I understand now, Kathryn. You inspire those same emotions in me. I am still confused as to why Ensign Celes’ face turned bright red before she ran out of Astrometrics before our shift ended.

Kathryn’s eyes got big. “I can’t begin to guess. What did you say to her exactly?”

Seven repeated that portion of the conversation, word for word.

Kathryn's head fell to her chest. “Oh, God.”

“Kathryn, why are you calling on a Diety you do not believe in?”

She shook her head. “Because Seven, she was probably trying not to picture her larger than life superhuman Captain in the throes of passion.”

“It’s natural for the crew to presume that we will engage in sexual activities, is it not?”

She continued to shake her head. “Oh, God. I need another drink.” She programmed a whiskey for herself and an apple juice for Seven. She belted the drink down in one quick gulp, handed Seven her apple juice, and replicated herself another whiskey. “Yes, it’s natural. However, I don’t know that I care for the entire crew trying to imagine us that way. Hell, I can’t even imagine it!”

Seven felt a shiver crawl up her spine. “Does that mean you have tried Kathryn?”

Kathryn suddenly looked mortified. “No, I haven’t tried! It would be completely inappropriate for me to imagine such things with a crew member.”

Seven put her head down and placed her glass on the table. “Then, you do not find me attractive?”

Scooting a bit closer on the sofa, Kathryn put her hand on top of Seven’s. “I find you very attractive, Seven. I have just never looked at you in that light before. We have been friends and that’s where I drew the line with you. It’s where I draw the line with everyone. Now that we are going to be married, I certainly won’t refuse you if that’s what you want,” she ran shaky fingers through her hair. “In our vows, we will promise to unite ourselves mind, body, soul, and spirit, and I never go back on a promise if I can help it.” Her tone was gentle and soothing. “All you would have to do is ask me.” Somewhere, in the dark recesses of her mind, she thought she might want her to.

Seven found that prospect intriguing. She had never looked at Kathryn that way either; she never knew it was permissible to think about the Captain that way. Now that they were engaged, it opened up a whole new world of possibilities. “And, if you wanted to unite in body, would  _ you _ ask me?” 

One thing that never failed to amaze Kathryn was the level of honesty Seven had. “If I felt it was something we both wanted, yes.” She picked up her glass and took a long pull from her drink.

Seven was silent for a moment. “Is kissing always a precursor to the horizontal bop?” Seven asked, matter of factly.

Shock registered on Kathryn’s face just before the belly laugh bubbled over and the whiskey sprayed out of her mouth and nose. She doubled over and grabbed her sides, trying to get herself under control. Had she not been a bit relaxed from three glasses of whiskey, she probably could have managed it. 

“My god, Seven, some of the things you say...” She squeezed her legs together as she skittered cross-legged to the ensuite.

She failed to see why it amused Kathryn so much but she enjoyed seeing her laugh; it made her heart feel warm, aside from the mist she was now covered in. She went to the replicator and ordered a towel to clean the coffee table off with and dabbed her biosuit until it was semidry.

When Kathryn came back, she was still chuckling.

“Why did you walk to the ensuite like that?”

“Because I was laughing so hard I was about to pee my pants.” She chose not to elaborate when she saw the confused look in Seven’s eyes. She settled into the corner of the sofa, curling her feet together. “Now, to answer your question. Kissing is not always a precursor to making love, but it certainly can be. Some couples purposely have... make-out sessions for no other reason than they enjoy it.” Kathryn answered the question as soon as she saw her mouth open, trying to hold back a chuckle. “A 'make-out session' is an extended time of kissing.”

“First base?” Seven asked shyly, not wanting to be incorrect in the terminology.

Kathryn dipped her head in the affirmative. “Second base, because I know you’re going to ask, is kissing and touching over clothing. It’s often referred to as petting.”

Seven was beginning to understand why people would want to touch. She had wanted to touch Kathryn when they had practiced kissing. 

“And third base?” Seven asked.

Kathryn downed the last little bit of her drink and replicated another. She settled back in next to Seven. “Third base, or heavy petting, is when people kiss and touch under the clothing.”   
  
Seven gulped in a breath of air. She thought she would very much like to touch Kathryn’s skin. “A home run is when people 'knock boots,' although I don’t believe that term is accurate.”

Kathryn just smiled. The little devil on her shoulder wanted her to tell Seven to wait and see. She glanced at her shoulder and told it to fuck off. 

“We can talk about that more some other time if you like. Isn’t it time for you to meet B’Elanna? After all, this  _ is _ our last night of freedom. 

“You are teasing me again, but yes.” Seven headed for the door.

Feeling more than a little buzzed and a bit courageous, she said, “Uh, Seven? I think you’re forgetting something.” Kathryn walked over to her and wrapped her arms around her shoulders. “It’s traditional for married couples to kiss each other goodbye. And, we do need to practice getting over the awkwardness of it all.”

And Seven did, leaving a swaying Janeway gasping for air as the doors slid shut.

Even before she arrived at the mess hall, she could hear music thumping. When the doors swished open, she could feel the breeze from the huge bass modules. Above the speakers, there was a scrolling sign that read, ‘Everybody Wants Some - VanHalen.’ She suspected Tom Paris had a hand in it somewhere. She made a note to find out what a VanHalen was just before a crowd descended on her, drinks being shoved into both of her hands. 

She recognized the faces of everyone there, one of which was Samantha Wildman, Naomi’s mother. She tossed her arm around Seven’s waist and gave it a good tug. “Drink up, Seven, for the end is almost nigh!” 

She had to shout to make herself heard over the raucous noise of the music. “Alcohol impairs my…” 

Before she could finish her sentence, an unseen hand forced the drink to her mouth and she could either swallow or allow it to be dumped on her. Since nothing in the Delta Quadrant was to be wasted, she opened her mouth wide and drank it down. Cheers erupted around her and two more were shoved in her hands. Someone, she thought it was Megan Delaney, wrapped a red feather boa around her neck and draped it around her shoulders while her twin, Jennifer, put a hat on her head and tied it snuggly under her chin. The crowd began to chant: “Drink...drink...drink...drink…” so she did. All night long.

  
  


Just as Kathryn was getting ready to settle in for the night, her door chime rang, again. “Honestly, Seven…” she broke the biosensor beam with her foot, “you don’t have to knoc―”

The last thing she saw was Tuvok on the other side of the door before she felt something go over her head and felt herself being unceremoniously heaved over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes. She struggled to be set free but he only tightened his grip on her. “Captain, the less you struggle, the easier it will be for you. You will not be harmed.”

“Goddamn it, Tuvok! Put me down, that’s an order!” she bellowed.

“I can not obey that order at this time, Captain.” He responded in a typical Vulcan fashion.

“Oh for god's sake! This is mutiny! You’ve lost your goddamned Vulcan mind if you think I’m just going to let this slide... _ crewman _ .”

If Vulcans could cringe, he would have. He began thinking of ways to make Tom Paris’s life as difficult as possible as he carried his cargo to the holodeck, after all, it  _ was _ his idea to kidnap the Captain. When proposing said plan, he stated it would either have to be Tuvok or Chakotay because those were the only two she couldn’t throw out an airlock. He strongly suspected Tom may have been incorrect about that and he highly doubted that it would do him any good to tell her he was simply carrying out the order issued to him by Chakotay. After the first two decks, she finally stopped struggling. That was a very bad sign.

Janeway could only imagine how ridiculous she looked being carried like sack through the corridors of her own ship. As the journey dragged on, she heard various crew members cheering and offering her congratulations ranging everywhere from, “Right on, Captain,” to “It’s all over now, Captain.” She thought she heard an echo of someone wishing they could be in her shoes but with the blood rushing to her head like it was, not to mention the buzz she had going, she couldn’t be sure.

She heard the swoosh of doors open, lively Irish music playing from somewhere and shortly after, she felt her feet hit solid ground. She ripped the bag off of her head and leveled a force 10 glare at her kidnapper. Tuvok merely raised an eyebrow while Tom Paris pressed a whiskey into her hand and got the hell out of the way. 

“I apologize for my behavior, Captain. As your Chief of Security, I will put myself on report and report to the brig after I have ‘gotten you to the church on time.’”

Oblivious to the volcanic glare Tuvok was being subjected to, Harry Kim started a round of ‘For She’s a Jolly Good Fellow’ and the crowd gathered ‘round her. Kathryn downed her drink and demandingly held up her glass for a refill, never taking her eyes off of the dark man in front of her. “I’ll let it slide this time,  _ old friend _ ,” she said with a dangerously quiet whip in her voice, “but if you ever pull anything like that again, I’ll strip you of your rank and have you scrubbing biowaste manifolds, with a toothbrush, all the way back to the Alpha Quadrant. Do I make myself clear, Mr. Tuvok?” she smiled a very feral smile. 

He kept his eyes focused on the wall behind her and replied, “Yes, Captain.” She downed her second drink, rather her sixth in total, and hadn’t asked for a seventh yet when Tom came and refilled her glass, eminently grateful it wasn’t he who kidnapped the captain. 

“Would you like to shoot some pool, Captain?” Tom asked. Judging by his pleadingly apologetic expression, she came to the conclusion that he planned the entire thing. She shot one more paint peeling glance at Tuvok before turning her attention to the fair-haired helmsman. “Sure, Tom,” she said with a gleam in her eyes. 

Tuvok remained where he was, still standing stiffly at attention.

Waves of laughter coursed through the holodeck program as people availed themselves of the various bar games. Harry and Crewman Henley were playing darts while others were scattered elsewhere. Seeing how relaxed her crew was, she decided it wasn’t such a bad thing to socialize with them for one night. They had precious little free time, and it was good for morale for everyone to be able to let their hair down once in a while. 

On their way to the pool table, she made it a point to thank Ensign Hickman for the sage advice he’d offered Seven earlier in the day. She watched the color drain from his face and left him to contemplate his fate as a mischievous smile graced her lips. She was starting to have fun after all. 

After she lost the first three games, Tom tested the waters for a friendly wager. While gambling was against regulations, Janeway overlooked it as long as it wasn’t damaging to the crew or her ship. It was good for morale and gave her people something to look forward to. Overlooking it was one thing, openly participating was another. As it was, she always went through Tuvok to place her wagers, trusting him to cover his tracks well enough that it could never be traced back to her. “Now, Tom,” she said straight-faced, “you know gambling is strictly prohibited on a Starfleet vessel.”

He had the good sense to look sheepish. “Yes, ma’am.” 

“However, if you win this game, I can offer you a gift. Something within my power to grant that won’t put Voyager or the crew in danger.”

His eyes lit up. “Yes, ma’am!” Feeling confident in his skills as a pool shark, he thought long and hard about what he would like. 

“How about a month off and unlimited holodeck privileges.”

Janeway pursed her lips and considered his request. “How about 3 days off and 3 extra hours any time it isn’t reserved?”

“That sounds fair enough.” He knew he shouldn't push his luck. 

“And what will you gift me if I win?” She asked, keeping her expression neutral.

Tom couldn’t help but laugh. “Captain, if you win, I’ll gift you 3 hours of my Captain Proton holodeck time and 3 of my off days.”

She pursed her lips and lowered her head before slowly raising it again. “I don’t know, Tom, the way you’ve been shooting tonight, I think you could afford to risk a little more, wouldn’t you agree?” No one seemed to notice the slight slur of her speech.

He subconsciously puffed his chest and gave her an arrogant smile. “You’ve got a point there, Captain. How about 5 hours of Proton time, 3 of my off days, and I’ll do 2 extra rotations in sickbay.”

She tapped her finger against her lips and paced the length of the pool table and back.

“How about 8 hours of your Captain Proton time, 5 of your off days, and you pass the field medic certification course?” She lifted an eyebrow and smiled.

“The field medic certification course?” His eyes got wide and his mouth got dry. “With the year it takes to prepare to pass the written exam and the clinics to pass the practical exam, it would take me at least 2 years to pass it.”

“Well,” she sighed, “if you’re afraid to lose… ”

He lifted his chin and split his face a haughty smile, “Done.”

“Very well then. I suggest we shoot for the break.”

Tom gestured toward the pool table, “Ladies first.”

Kathryn placed the cue ball on the table, slid the cue stick back and forth over her fingers a few times, and let ‘er rip. The cue ball hit the far rail and traveled back, kissing the rail in front of her.”

Tom’s eyes popped out of his head and his mouth hung open.

She didn’t bother to wipe the self-satisfied smirk off of her face. “Close your mouth before you catch some flies; you’re up.” 

His shot didn’t come close enough to the rail to win the break.

He turned to Harry and said, loud enough for Captain Janeway to hear, “I think I just got out hustled.”

Janeway lined up her shot and made a perfect break, dropping both solids and stripes in the pockets. She now had her choice of the color she would be playing. “You know what they say, Mr. Paris, if you can’t swim with the Megalodons, stay out of the ocean.”

Seeing blank looks all around the table, the Doctor piped in, “The Megalodon was the biggest shark ever to live on prehistoric Earth. It could grow up to 60 feet in length, had 276 teeth, some of which were seven inches long, and its jaw was 11 feet wide with a bite force of 30 tons. Its ‘cousin’, the Great White, only has a bite force of 2 tons. 

“Thanks for that charming natural history lesson, Dr. Encyclopedia,” Tom said with mock sarcasm. “Aren’t they all extinct now?”

Kathryn continued to run the table.

“Yes,” the Doctor answered. “It’s believed that the Megalodon went extinct due to its food supply going belly up,” he swayed his head side to side and smiled, amused by his own pun, “the Great White, however, was hunted to near extinction. So much for man being the most intelligent animal on the planet.”

Kathryn lined up her shot, called her pocket, and sunk the 8 ball. “That’s game, Mr. Paris. Thanks for the days off and the holodeck time. Get with the doctor about the FMCC.” She grinned smugly, even though she had no intention of utilizing his Captain Proton time or days off.

“Yeah, you’re welcome.” he groused semi-playfully.

“Before Tom decides to try and get even,” she said, clapping him on the back, “I’m going to call it a night. Thank you all for the lovely party.” Noticing Tuvok, still standing at attention, she smiled to herself, warmed by the ultimate gesture of respect he was showing her. He would stay there until she officially dismissed him, no matter how long it took. She lifted her head and raised her voice above the crowd, “At ease, Lieutenant Commander; you can’t get me to the church on time if you sprain something.”

She left the holodeck to a chorus of laughter along with, “Goodnight, Captain,” “Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do!” “Good luck, Captain,” “I’ll keep the getaway shuttle hovering!” 


	3. Part 3 - Finding Home

B’Elanna had to use every ounce of her Klingon strength to hold up her extremely inebriated and unreasonable Borg friend as they made their way to cargo bay 2. She tried to warn Seven that Virlaxian Sundrops packed a wallop, but by then, it was already too late. Somewhere between ‘Cunnilingo Bingo’ and ‘Pin the Clamp on the Nipple’ B’Elanna had tried to swap out the Virlaxian Sundrop with plain ‘ole Drox’tal juice but Samantha Wildman, of all people, kept feeding Seven more. “Kahless on a targ turd, Seven, you weigh three times more than I do. Seven didn’t care, she just kept on singing, ‘There once was a lady of beauty and grace, I asked her so kindly to sit on my face, she said with a grin, wiping me from her chin, I’ve had real good luck, hav’n you as a f—” 

“Seven of Nine, stop right where you are.” The voice that came from behind them was pure ice.

“Now you’ve done it. Where the fuck is a warp core breach when I need one?” B’Elanna mumbled under her breath as she helped turn Seven around.

Seven lifted her head and saw 6 very angry people standing in front of her. Perhaps a song would cheer them up. She picked up where she left off. “...uckkkkkkkkkkkk and I’d doooooooo it alllllll ooooooover agggaaaaaaaain!!!” Seven broke into a very big smile, feeling quite proud of herself. She pointed a swaying finger toward the images that were starting to swim before her eyes. “Kathryn,” she pointed her finger slightly to the left, “and another Kathryn,” she pointed her finger lower to the left, “why are there so many of you and Kahless fucking a warp core, you’re all so beeeeuuuuuttttiffffffulllllll and your kishes taste sooooooooooooooooooo gooooooood.” She tried to waggle her eyebrows and give Kathryn a lecherous look but it didn’t work so well due her to no longer being able to feel her face. It came off looking more like she was severely constipated.

Captain Janeway leveled a force 10 look at B’Elanna who, at that moment, wished she was at a nice, quiet dinner party with Species 8472. The Klingon desperately tried to stand at attention but she was buckling under the weight of too many Borg enhanced body parts. Seven tried to reach out and touch Kathryn which caused B’Elanna’s knees to give out which caused both of them to slam into the bulkhead, coming dangerously close to falling to the deck in a tangled heap. “Oh for fuck sake! Here we go again!” B’Elanna huffed. Only by the grace of her Klingon heritage was she able to summon the strength to keep them both upright.

Captain Janeway marched forward, hooked Seven’s left arm around her shoulder while B’Elanna took the other one and between them, they were able to get headed in the right direction again. Seven’s chin rested casually on her chest as her head lolled from side to side. Both women could still hear snippets of Seven’s favorite new song as they staggered down the corridor. Any crewmen they met on the way graciously flattened their backs against the bulkhead and stood at attention in a gesture of solidarity for their ‘fallen’ crewmate and in this case, also to avoid the paint peeling glare of a thoroughly pissed off captain.

B’Elanna thought they would never get to cargo bay 2. Seven stood swaying and singing, completely oblivious to warnings B’Elanna was discreetly trying to issue in regard to shutting her filthy Borg mouth. “I once knew a woman named Katie…..she tasted so good on my plate-e….I took great delight n eatin her through the niiiiiiiiiiight…” B’Elanna clamped her hand over Seven’s mouth and had the good sense not to even glance in Janeway’s direction. The Klingon realized a split-second too late that she did, indeed, need two hands to keep Seven upright. Seven’s arm, now freed, slid limply down B’Elanna back, and so did she. 

The last thing Janeway heard before Seven hit the deck was “TIMBER!!!!!!!” The Borg was passed out, cold.

  
  


“Jeeezus, Kahless, Buddha and Molaien, Seven! I can’t take you anywhere,” B’Elanna grumbled.

“Janeway to the Doctor.”

“Doctor here, Captain.”

“Medical Emergency in cargo bay 2. Janeway out.”

Her eyes held no warmth, no compassion and no mercy. She slammed her fists against her waist and advanced on B’Elanna like a lioness stalking her prey.

The Klingon pulled every ounce of height from her back as she could as she stood rooted to the deck. B’Elanna didn’t think it would be possible to be any more mortified until the captain picked up the hat that had fallen off of Seven’s head, landing near Janeway’s feet. When Janeway picked it up, B’Elanna uttered every prayer she could think of that she wouldn’t examine it too closely.

Kathryn heard the whine of the transporter, gave B’Elanna one last glare then turned her attention to the doctor, the hat dangled from her hand.

He ran his medical tricorder over Seven’s head, chest and torso.

“Report!” Janeway barked.

The tone in her voice made the hologram jump. If she hadn’t been so pissed, that would have been funny considering that holograms don’t get startled.

“She’s drunk and unconscious,” the Doctor said with a disgusted tone in his voice. Captain Janeway made a mental note to delete that particular subroutine in his holographic matrix.

“I’m aware, Doctor,” she growled. “Why didn’t her nanoprobes take care of this? Are they malfunctioning in some way?”

“No. The amount of alcohol she ingested simply overwhelmed the little buggers.” He looked sharply at B’Elanna, who shrugged with feigned innocence, and then snapped back to attention.

He loaded a hypospray with suspended nanoprobes and an analgesic and injected it into her neck. “The suspended nanoprobes activated as soon as they hit her bloodstream. The analgesic will help with the hangover. If we can get her into her alcove and start her regeneration cycle, she should be fine in a few hours, although she may wish she was dead.”

Janeway looked at B’Elanna who shook her head and held her hands up in front of her. “I can’t pick her up, Captain, I had a hell of a time holding her up when she could still walk...sort of....”

“Oh for Christ’s sake…” Kathryn rubbed the bridge of her nose. 

“Oh please, allow me.” The doctor quipped sarcastically. He altered his matrix, scooped Seven up and gently placed her in her alcove. Most of her hair had come out of its customary twist and she had a peculiar green pallor but she was still the most beautiful creature he had ever laid eyes on.

Kathryn started her regeneration cycle and turned her attention back to B’Elanna, feeling completely drained. 

Suddenly remembering she had something in her hand, she held the hat up in front of her, examining it closely. It was shaped in a perfect representation of the female genitalia, the open legs being represented as two flaps that hung down on either side of the wearer's head and had two thin straps to tie under the chin. Perched in the center were the labium majus and minus and traveling higher, was the clitoral representation. It even had shimmering, wafting, pubic hair. Her eyes opened wide, then narrowed, when she realized the pubic hair on the left side was colored blonde and hair on the right side colored red. Split, literally, directly up the middle. Kathryn let her hand drop casually to her side, hat still clutched in her fingers. 

She used every bit of command training she knew to ratchet up her force 10 glare to a force 20. When she spoke, it was almost a whisper. “You get a reprieve for tonight, _Miss_ Torres, but I’ll see you in my ready room first thing in the morning. Do I make myself clear?” 

She knew it was coming. _Kahless help me, not now. Oh, fuck me, here it comes._ How she managed to keep the vomit from spewing out of her mouth, she would never know but it burned like a G’Karian lava flow on the way back down. She hoped she kept her expression impassive and focused but she highly doubted it. “Yes, ma’am.” B’Elanna didn’t notice the small amount of vomit that had spilled onto her blouse when she opened her mouth to speak.

Janeway gave a disgusted grunt and headed for her quarters, a much needed bath, and some analgesics of her own. She looked one more time at the hat, thinking it had been a while since she had seen one. She tossed it in her closet and shut the door. Eventually, she would think the whole incident was funny but it wasn’t going to happen tonight. 

Freshly showered, dressed, yet still reeking of alcohol, B’Elanna Torres stood in front of Seven’s alcove and waited for her regeneration cycle to complete. She had no idea what to expect. With anyone else, she may have to hold their head over the porcelain goddess as they made their offerings, but this was completely new territory. She caught herself singing one of Seven’s new songs and quickly shut herself up.

“Regeneration Cycle Complete”

Seven’s eyes snapped open and she immediately ran a self diagnostic. Something was very wrong. As she took her first step on the dias, her knee buckled. She grabbed onto the railing and managed to keep herself from falling. She felt like her head was being dismantled from the inside out and her eyes refused to focus. She switched to infrared which made the pain in her head feel as if a cutting torch exploded inside of it. She swayed unsteadily and put her hands on her screaming head. It didn't help.

“Easy there, Seven.”

The voice thundered into her head, making her nerve endings feel like they were going through a Borg reclamator. 

“B’E…” Seven covered her ears with her hands to try and make the pounding stop.

“Seven,” B’Elanna whispered, “our shifts start in an hour. Come back to my quarters with me and I’ll help get you cleaned up.” She didn’t envy Seven. Not one bit. Her face, especially considering the decidedly green cast she had and it wasn’t from her alcove. She stepped up on the dias and put Seven’s arm around her shoulder. “Lean on me a little bit and take it slow,” she said, keeping her voice at a mere whisper.

“Why are you yelling at me?” Seven croaked softly.

“I’m actually whispering, Seven. You only think I’m yelling because you’re extremely sensitive to sound right now.” She eased her down the step and out the cargo bay doors. The corridor was awash with other crewmen who were walking a little slower, talking a little quieter and definitely more pale than usual. Ensign Miller, who had missed the mess hall festivities, made a point of yelling, “Hiya, Seven, hi B’Elanna!” as she passed them in the corridor, snickering goodnaturedly all the while. Seven groaned and stumbled, banging B’Elanna into the bulkhead.

“Kahless on a turd stick, here we go again.” She muttered at full volume and instantly regretted when Seven turned to say something to her and deposited a healthy portion of Virlaxian Sundrops all down the front of her. She gritted her teeth against the heave she felt trying to work its way up and nearly succeeded, until Seven yakked on her again. 

“Fuck this,” B’Elanna mumbled.

“Computer, initiate a site to site transport. Two to beam to sickbay.” She wished on Khaless’ beard she had thought to do it earlier.

  
  


When they materialized, the doctor gave them a pointed look, eyebrows raised and lips pursed. He ran a tricorder over them both and helped B’Elanna get Seven to a biobed.

“Judging by the looks of you two, is it safe to say neither one of you will be reporting to duty today?”

“Oh no no no no, the Captain expects us to report to duty and I’m in enough trouble as it is. I can’t be late or she’ll carve my bones out with a spoon. Just get Seven cleaned up and to where she can walk by herself and send her on her merry way.” She checked the chronometer. “Shit! I have to go! Take care of Seven but make damn sure she’s at that staff meeting!”

  
  


Seven never realized how loud a starship was. The hum of the warp core reverberated through her head like the sharpest whirling Borg utility tools she could imagine. Her mouth felt she would never produce saliva again and her legs struggled to bear her weight. When the doors to the conference room slid open, it pounded a spike through her cortical node. The doctor had given her something to ease the swirling sensation in her abdomen but it did nothing to ease the constant pounding in her head or the 42.8 percent reduction of strength. She wondered if the lighting was malfunctioning as well. It seemed to be 82.4 percent brighter than it was at 07:58 the previous day. Everyone was looking at her with a mixture of amusement and pity. She would ask Kathryn about that later, then she saw it. The hard, steely gaze of her Captain. She was not looking at her with amusement, nor pity. She suddenly understood what the phrase, ‘if looks could kill’ meant. She quickly looked at B’Elanna but the feisty Klingon was sitting straight up in her chair, with her hands folded in front of her, looking like the epitome of a starship officer. Her uniform was clean but she could still detect the smell of alcohol on her and something else she couldn’t identify. Seven gingerly took her seat, careful to avoid the Captain’s gaze.

Kathryn slowly took measure of all of the senior staff, one by one. Out of everyone in the room, B’Elanna and Seven were the only ones who were badly hungover. “Good morning,” she said overly loudly, “how is everyone?” She gave Chakotay a glance.

Picking up her cue, he announced, in a very loud voice, “I’m doing well, Captain. It was a lovely party last night, don’t you agree, Mr. Paris?”

“Oh, yes. A fine party, indeed.”

Seven shut her eyes and willed to be assimilated.

Kathryn saved B’Elanna and Seven for last.

“How are things in Engineering this morning, Lieutenant?”

B’Elanna was sure the Captain’s voice had ratched up considerably in volume.

She forced herself to hold the Captain’s gaze. “Engineering reports that the warp core is at 98.7 percent efficiency and all systems are operating within normal tolerance, ma’am.” 

“Very well, and Astrometrics?” She shifted her gaze to Seven.

Seven tried to sit as tall as she could. “Astrometrics reports that all systems are functioning within acceptable parameters.”

“Nothing more to report?” 

Seven lifted her slitted eyes briefly enough to recognize the hint of a sparkle behind the steely gaze but it didn’t make her feel any better. “No, Captain.”

Kathryn flung her arm in a wide gesture and snipped, “You’re all dismissed. Lieutenant?”

B’Elanna stood at attention and awaited further instructions.

“My ready room. Now.”

“Yes, ma’am.” It was crunch time.

  
  
  


Seven made her way to Astrometrics feeling like the ship was entirely too big all of sudden. She kept her head down and felt along the bulkheads until she finally set foot in her lab.

The Delany sisters were on duty and immediately went over and helped Seven to her station. “You were pretty lit last night, how ya feelin?” Jenny asked, or was it Megan? Seven couldn’t be sure at the moment.

“I am malfunctioning and _Voyager_ is malfunctioning. Run a level 4 diagnostic on the lighting system to see why the luminosity has increased.”

The Delany sisters laughed, causing Seven to, once again, cover her ears and groan.

“There’s nothing wrong with the lights, you’re just hungover. If you eat something and stay hydrated, it’ll pass.”

Seven’s face paled at the mention of food and she seemed to have a vague impression of a cake?  
  
“Doctor to Seven.”

“Seven here.”

“Please report to sickbay.”

“On my way, Seven out,” she whispered.

  
  


Seven walked slowly into sickbay, holding her head in her hands. She had finally figured out that by keeping them there and applying light pressure, made it feel marginally better. The doctor was busy treating an onslaught of patients who had been at her party the night before. Judging by the way they looked, they weren’t faring much better than she was. Samantha Wildeman glanced up from the biobed she was laying on and gave Seven a wink, and a weak smile. The doctor pressed a hypospray against her neck and Seven watched in amazement as her skin went from dull and ashen to something that resembled its normal color. The same thing was happening in every occupied biobed. Tom Paris was treating the patients who were better off than she.

“Doctor, you wanted to see me?”

“I’m a little busy at the moment, Seven, have a seat in my office. I’ll be with you in a moment.

Seven went into his office and plopped herself onto the chair. Every time she closed her eyes, the room spun. Having her feet on the floor wasn’t helping her equilibrium.

When the doctor came in, he closed the door and initiated the privacy windows. He ran his tricorder over her head, arms and torso, paying careful attention to her implants. “Mmhum, uhhuh, mmmhum… ”

“I am malfunctioning. Correct it. Now.” She was positive she was saying that in a tone that brooked no argument, however, when she heard herself, it sounded like a quiet, raspy whisper.

“You aren’t malfunctioning, Seven. You have what is called a hangover. It must have been some party,” he said with an indignant tone, “almost every one of your attendee’s have been in to see me this morning.” He turned around and picked up a hypospray. “This is a combination of suspended nanoprobes and minerals. It will stimulate the production of vasopressin so your body can start to reabsorb water again.” He put that one down and picked up another. “This is an analgesic for the pain.” It won’t cure you but it should make it tolerable enough for you to function. In light of last night’s ‘festivities,’ the Captain has asked me to help you pick out what you’re going to wear tomorrow.” He handed her a bottle of water. “Drink this.”

He spun his view around and called up the “Wedding Attire” section. “Are you going to wear a dress or perhaps a nice suit or tuxedo?

“I am not going. After last night the Captain will wish to cease our relationship. She hates me now.”

“Oh, Seven, she doesn’t hate you. She’s the one who wanted me to help you pick something lovely for your wedding. If she ‘wished to cease’ your relationship, would it make sense for her to want you to look stunning for your wedding?” He pushed the bottle back up to her lips. “Drink.”

Her thoughts were becoming clearer and she thought the Doctor made a logical statement. “I hope you are correct, Doctor.”

“Perhaps you could ask if she has a moment to talk so you two can clear the air.”

Seven left the Doctor’s office and headed for the turbolift. “Seven to Janeway.”

“Janeway here.”

“Do you have a moment to speak with me privately?”

“Meet me in my ready room. Janeway out.”

The further Seven walked, the stronger she felt. Her legs were carrying her much easier and the constant pounding had decreased to bearable levels. She stepped onto the bridge and noticed several furtive glances being cast her way. She ignored them and pushed the entrance chime.

“Come.”

Captain Janeway was standing at the replicator with her back turned, and Seven waited to be acknowledged. 

“Two waters, cold.”

She handed one to Seven and went to the upper deck and sat down, motioning for Seven to join her.

“What’s on your mind, Seven?” she asked, the command mask firmly in place.

“I am experiencing feelings of trepidation.” Her voice still wasn’t quite up to snuff.

“About?” Katherine gentled her tone with practiced ease.

“I have made you angry. I am afraid you will not want to continue our mission.”

Janeway pursed her lips as she considered how to respond. She had been more furious in the span of a few hours than she could ever remember being in her entire life. And she knew it wasn’t Seven’s fault. She had too much to drink before the kidnapping, for one thing. For another, it was downright humiliating to be carried through her own ship like that, and by Tuvok of all people. It was completely out of character for him. She did manage to wheedle the information out of Chakotay of how that whole scenario came to be in the first place. She wasn’t a bit surprised that Tom was the mastermind behind it all. When the antimatter hit the warp core, what it all boiled down to was Tuvok was following an order with strict instructions not to stray from his mission under any circumstances. She had forgiven him as soon as she had dismissed him.

On top of all of that, when she saw Seven staggering down the corridor with B’Elanna as a prop, she had seen red. B’Elanna was supposed to be looking out for her. And poor Seven. Seeing her that way just snapped something in her that she couldn’t put a finger on.

“Seven,” she reached over and took Seven’s hand, “This is going to be a much longer conversation than either of us has time for right now.” Seeing the fear in Seven’s eyes, she knew she couldn’t just leave it hanging. “I want to continue our mission, Seven.”

Seven looked at her and saw that her eyes had turned from that cold, steel, gray to the warm blue she enjoyed seeing so much. “You do?” her eyes lit up the room.

“I do. I’ll see you in my… at home after our shifts, okay?” She took a drink of water, stood up and nodded to Seven’s still full glass. “Drink that down.” 

Now that Seven was virtually an expert at chugging, it didn’t take her long to finish it. Janeway was rather impressed.

Kathryn held her hand and led her across to the doorway, expecting her to leave. Instead, Seven placed a gentle kiss on her lips. “I will see you tonight, darling,” she said gently, testing the use of an endearment for the first time.

Kathryn couldn’t help but smile.

Seven returned to the Doctor feeling much more clear than when she had left. Her strength was up to 91.3 percent, the pain in her head was tolerable, her vision had cleared, and Kathryn still wanted to preserve the covert operation. Her. She pulled up a chair in front of the Doctors desk and pulled up the ‘Wedding Attire’ directory.

“Please state th…oh, it’s you. Welcome back. I trust you’re feeling better? After all, you do have the best EMH in the Delta Quadrant.”

“You are the only EMH in the Delta Quadrant. Assist me, please. I am uncomfortable choosing what to wear.”

“Seeing how I am the best doctor in the DQ, I anticipated your discomfort and have found a solution.”

She lifted an eyebrow, not sure at all what he meant by that. He disappeared around the corner and waved in Naomi Wildman.

She ran to Seven and threw her little arms around her. “I heard you’re going to marry the Captain, can you make her let me on the bridge sometimes? I know what all the stations are. There’s Auxiliary Engineering, Operations, Tactical… ” 

“She is still the Captain, Naomi Wildman. I can not “make” her do anything when it comes to the function of this vessel.” Seeing disappointment written all over the little girl’s face, she added, “But, I may be able to put in a good word for you.”

Her little face lit up like a pulsar. “Thank you, Seven, I knew you wouldn’t let me down. Now, what do you want to wear tomorrow?” she started swiping through options in the database. “I really like this one, it would look so pretty on you.”

“Naomi Wildman, this is an exceptional garment.”

Seven dropped her garment off at B’Elanna’s before she went to the cargo bay to pick up some of her personal items. She carried everything in one small box. When she arrived at the Captain’s cabin, she tested to see if B’Elanna had entered her biosensor data into the computer to allow for immediate access. She broke the plane of the entryway and was satisfied when the doors to the Captain's quarters...her new quarters... opened. It was dark inside, which meant Kathryn wasn’t home yet. It felt strange to be there without her, empty. She didn't feel like she had just come home; she felt more like an interloper in someone’s private shrine. She thought about what Kathryn would do right now and ordered water from the replicator. The Doctor had insisted that she drink at least double the amount she usually did, if not more. She considered what else Kathryn would do. She had often seen her sitting in her recliner reading a romance novel. She wandered over to the bookcase, picked one, and began to read. 

_Love’s Thundering Heart of Eternity_

_By Rowland Richmond_

_Prologue:_

_I ask myself this question every day now. Do I love her? I can see her standing there, soaked from the rain, her eyes begging me for an answer. How can I say no? How can I say yes? So I walked away. I left her standing in the deluge that I imagined my heart to look like. Cold, scattered, destructive._

_I asked her once what she saw in the rain. She said she saw life, nurishment, warmth, redemption._

_I wrap my blanket more tightly now. I’m so cold. My hands won’t stop shaking and my teeth chatter against my will. Ha! My will._

_What good has my will ever done me? It was my will that got me into this mess in the first place. Stop desiring, stop willing._

_Do I love her? Do I even want to know? I can feel the warmth seeping out of me with every breath I take. I’m so cold. Can I imagine my life without her?_

_The rain on the tin roof sounds like the sizzle of a steak._

“Seven? Did you raid my bookshelf?” Kathryn asked jokingly, as she shrugged out of her uniform jacket and tossed it over the back of the chair. She disappeared into the bedroom and came out a few minutes later wearing a dark blue pair of sweatpants and a dark yellow T-shirt. She took a peek at the cover of the book in Seven’s hands and chuckled.

“You weren’t here when I got here...home. I did not know what to do with myself so I imagined what you would be doing.”

“I have to say, Seven, you imagined pretty accurately. That book you picked out, it’s a pretty dark read. Meaning the subject matter is depressing, violent or disturbing in some way.”

“Then, why do you read it? Do we not get enough of violence and being disturbed in the Delta Quadrant? Humanity is confusing.” She got up and put the book back where she found it. 

“Would you like something to eat?” Kathryn asked, giving her a quick squeeze on her shoulder, she was already running through the menu choices she knew she could replicate without setting _Voyager_ on fire. She settled on grilled cheese and tomato soup and ordered double. “Come and eat with me; you must be hungry.”

Seven sat down and poked at the food, enjoying the texture of it on the tips of her fingers. When her curiosity had been satisfied, she took a small bite. The texture of the toasted bread felt rough on the roof of her mouth while the cheese felt soft and velvety, like Kathryn’s lips when they kissed. She casually flicked her tongue out to capture a drip of melted cheese and drew it into her mouth. Wondering what would happen if she squeezed the sandwich together, she tried it. Cheese started to ooze out from between the bread and Seven turned it vertically and licked a long swipe, enjoying the contrast of the rough bread and the silky cheese on her tongue. She dipped the edge of the grilled triangle into her mouth and pulled it out slightly before taking her first bite.

Kathryn sat transfixed. If her eyes had been lasers, she would have burned a hole through Seven of Nine, Tertiary Adjunct of Unimatrix Zero One. She felt a familiar stirring and excused herself from the table.

Seven swirled a corner of the grilled cheese around in her soup and took another bite. So many things she thought were irrelevant started to have some meaning for her now. Taste was not irrelevant. It was fascinating. It was the melding of many in order to form the one. It was logical and precise. She resolved not to think badly of Neeliix and his leola root creations. After a long few minutes, she was starting to grow concerned that Kathryn hadn’t come back to the table yet. She hadn’t touched her dinner.

Crossing the living room, she called into the bedroom. “Kathryn, are you all right?”

“Yeah, I’m fine. I’ll be out in a minute. Go ahead and finish eating.” she sounded strained.

“I will put yours in stasis to keep it warm for you.” No one liked cold dinner, did they?

“Thanks, Seven,” she called from the ensuite.

She sat down and looked at the probe data. Everything looked the same as it did the last time so then she pulled up a garment database. Looking at clothes with Naomi had been fun. The little Ktarian was so enthusiastic and was always brutally honest; it was a trait Seven admired. She found several pairs of pants she liked and quite a few blouses, as well. Because she hardly ever used her ration slips, she had amassed a healthy amount. She was well aware she could only wear one outfit at a time as she only had one when she was first severed from the collective. It hadn’t bothered her to wear the same thing day in and day out; it was all she knew as a drone. Now, things were being modified. She felt like she was finally beginning to embrace the humanity she denied herself for so long, stuck on the treadmill of change. She started with one pair of black pants, and a red cotton, long sleeved, button down blouse, a dark gray pair of sweatpants and two T-shirts in varying shades of blue. She wasn’t sure if she was doing the right thing, even though it was of no consequence if she wasn’t. She punched in her order and went to the replicator. She held up the items, one by one, turning them over in her hands and noticing the difference in texture although it was all made out of the same material.

“Oh, those look nice, Seven. Try them on, let’s see how they fit.” Kathryn said smiling as she took her customary place on the sofa.

Seven reached behind her neck and undid the clasp, allowing her biosuit to billow into a heap at her feet.

Kathryn made a squeaking sound and slammed her eyes shut. “Seven, I meant you could change in the bedroom or the ensuite,” she said, sounding mildly tense.

Seven picked her clothes up and went to change, not understanding exactly what she did wrong to make Kathrn uncomfortable. She chose the sweatpants and light blue T-shirt, because Kathryn looked comfortable when she wore hers, and then joined Kathryn on the sofa.

“I thought you were going to show me your new clothes?” Disappointment colored her tone. She had been looking forward to some light, nonsensical time before delving into the matters at hand.

“When I undid my biosuit, you turned your head away and your body tensed. Are you afraid of me, Kathryn?”

“You do have a way of pinning me down, don’t you? I guess that’s a good thing for a crusty old captain like me.” A sad smile twitched at the corner of her lips

Seven had learned enough about Kathryn to know, in times like this, if she allowed the silence, Kathryn would fill it.

“I tensed up, Seven, because I was just really surprised that you disrobed in front of me.” The little devil on her shoulder came out to watch the fun. “People usually do that kind of thing in private.” 

“There is no such thing as privacy in the collective. Drones have no need for it.”

“Well, we mere humans do. You look lovely, by the way. It’s refreshing to see you out of that biosuit.”

Seven raised her eyebrows, “That’s not what you thought a moment ago.”

Kathryn caught the subtle gleam in her eye and tugged a smile onto her face. “I think you’ve been spending way too much time with B’Elanna. She’s a bad influence on you,” she teased. “Speaking of which, do you still have questions about last night?”

“My cortical node was malfunctioning. I only have bits and pieces of memory from last night,” she dropped her head slightly. “I remember seeing you in the corridor and you were very angry with me. This morning at the briefing, your eyes weren't sparkling like they normally do. I felt afraid that you would not want to continue our covert operation.”

“I understand that feeling, believe me. When I was the Chief Science Officer on the _Al-Batani,_ I got dressed down once or twice; it’s a very scary feeling but it serves a purpose.”

“Did you dress me down last night?”

“No. Trust me, if I ever give you a good dressing down, you’ll know it. No matter how angry I may get at you, I need for you to know that I’m taking this covert operation...our marriage... very seriously. I’m not going to let anyone hurt you and as long as there’s still breath in me, the only way I’ll ever leave you is if you want me to. I was raised with the core belief that marriage is a lifetime commitment. That’s probably the reason I never got married to begin with. I guess I always knew, deep down inside, it wasn’t right for me.”

Seven sat a little taller and held her head a little higher. “And, it is with me?”

“Well,” she sighed, “I know I care for you very deeply, and that’s as good of a place as any to start. So,” she began, suddenly feeling the need to change the subject, “aside from the unpleasant after effects, did you enjoy the party last night?” she asked, anxious to hear what all went on. Judging by the hat, it had been a doozy.

“B’Elanna said it was going to be a ‘nice, little get together’ but I think she erred in her description. There was very loud music and a lot of drinking. As I said, my cortical node malfunctioned so I don’t recall most of the events. When I arrived, I recall the Delaney sisters dressing me in a feather boa and tying something to my head which signified that I was the guest of honor,” she paused to think, “and there was singing. Ensign Wildman has a lovely voice; although, the songs were sexually graphic in nature and utilized colorful language.” she tilted her head. “From what I recall, mostly everything was sexually graphic in nature. I find that curious. Humans want their sexual interactions to be private, yet, the party seemed to revolve around it.” 

_It certainly did._ Kathryn shifted slightly, “It’s not uncommon for a bachelor or bachelorette party to have,” she paused to consider, “a ribald theme to it. While it’s true that most people want their interactions to be private, there’s an appropriate time and place for that kind of humor.”

“It was the appropriate time and place because married people copulate.” A faint blush colored her cheeks as she remembered her body’s reaction when they kissed.

Kathryn shifted again. “Yes. However, if someone strode onto the bridge one day and told a dirty joke, or made some kind or sexually explicit comment, I would have to discipline them.”

“That would be the wrong place and the wrong time,” Seven nodded. “When the Ensigns Delaney put the hat and boa on me, I felt like I was a part of the crew. I felt special and when Samantha Wildman taught everyone the songs, I felt as though we all had something in common, when in reality, I don’t share common interests with many of them.”

Kathryn reached out and held her hand. “You are special, Seven. I’m glad the crew is finally beginning to see you the way I do. You felt like you had something in common with them because, in their eyes, you _do_.”

Seven knit her brows together.

“What I mean is, because we’re getting married, they think we’ve been sleeping together for some time now.”

“I understand now. They finally see me as human.” She averted her gaze. She felt like she was just beginning to understand what it meant to be human. Her friendship with B'Elanna had been instrumental in teaching her about day to day interactions but the one who had taught her the most was sitting right beside her.

“Kathryn?”

“Hum?”

Seven cast a furtive glance at her, “I believe I still feel awkward about kissing you.” 

Kathryn sucked in a breath. “Well, we’ll have to see what we can do about that, won’t we,” she smiled and waited.

The corners of Seven’s lips curled up slightly as she moved closer to Kathryn, sliding a long arm around her waist, causing a rush of adrenaline, which caused her stomach to flutter and noted her breathing had increased by 1.6 percent. “I am experiencing anticipation,” she said as she slowly closed the gap between them. “Your eyes are sparkling and have shaded to a deep blue.” She looked at her lips and stopped, a breath away. “Your lips are slightly parted and your respiration has increased 2.4 percent.” Seven tilted her head, never losing eye contact, and slid her hand up Kathry’s back. “Your breathing has increased by another 1.3 percent.” Curiosity made her bring her other hand up to brush lightly across Kathyn’s cheek and down the side of her neck. “Your respiration has increased again, your cheeks are flushed, and I have yet to kiss you,” her voice was a husky whisper. 

Kathryn couldn’t take much more and started to lean in.

Seven shook her head, “Don’t move,” she whispered, “I want to see you.”

Kathryn took a shaky breath and swallowed, but didn’t move.

Seven licked her lips and ran her eyes down Kathryn’s face and then further down, fascinated by the way Kathyrn’s pulse throbbed just beneath her skin. She let her eyes wander lower, committing the freckle patterns on her chest to a unique location in her eidetic memory. They went lower still, to her breasts. “Your nipples are erect. Is it painful?” she uttered.

“No,” Kathryn whispered.

“Describe what it feels like, Kathryn,” she asked, her voice starting to tremble.

Kathryn took a deep, shaky breath, let her head fall back and concentrated on the sensation. “I can feel the fabric of my shirt rubbing against me every time I breathe.”

Seven slid one hand up her back and the other to the pulse point on her neck, gently caressing as she went. “What does it feel like when you feel the fabric rubbing against you?”

Kathryn was almost beside herself. “It feels like sparks of electricity,” she inhaled a shaky breath.

Seven slid her hand to her shoulder and traced her clavicle with her thumb and slowly down her arm, until she reached her hand, entwining their fingers.

“Is that the only sensation you feel?” she asked, breathlessly. 

Kathryn dug her fingers into Seven’s hand. “No.”

“Tell me,” Seven murmured as she brushed her cheek against Kathryn’s, inhaling her fragrance. She dipped her head and inhaled the length of her neck.

Kathryn whimpered. “It feels like heat and tension crawling all over my skin.” She eased her hungry hand along the sofa cushion until it came into contact with Seven’s leg and glided up to her thigh.

Seven gently removed Kathryn’s hand and placed it on top of the sofa. “I asked you not to move,” she whispered, her breath hot against her ear.

“What else do you feel right now, Kathryn? Why are you trembling? Describe it to me.”

Kathryn let out a long, deep moan. “I feel everything. I feel your hand caressing my back and your breath, hot, against my skin. I can feel my nipples straining against my T-shirt, and...”

“And what, Kathryn? I want to know everything you feel.”

“Oh god, Annika,” she moaned, “I feel like I’m on fire and you haven’t even touched me.” Seven was asking more of her than she had ever given before. She felt self-conscious and exposed yet wanted to give what had been asked of her. She could hear Seven’s breath in her ear, and heard a soft moan rumble up from the back of Seven’s throat. A devilish thought passed through her mind, and she smiled mischievously as she hissed a ragged breath in through her teeth. _Two can play this game._

“I feel like every nerve ending has come to life; it’s torturous and needy. Everywhere your hands touch me sends lightning down my spine, and it makes me throb. I’m drenched, Annika, and aching for you,” she moaned. “I’m so close; you won’t even have to touch me and I’ll come for you,”she said in a breathless whisper. “Would you like that, darling?”

She heard Seven whimper, as she lifted her head and rested their foreheads against each other.

“Tell me what you want, Annika.”

Seven choked back a sob, “I don’t know, Kathryn. I feel so many new sensations, I don’t know where to begin. I want to kiss you and taste you and I want to touch and explore you.”

Kathryn looked into her eyes and saw the heat of her frustration, the raw desire, and the confusion. She slowed her breathing and willed her body to calm down. “I understand, darling.” With a trembling hand, she cupped Seven’s cheek gently. “This is all new to you, it can be overwhelming and frightening.”

Seven placed her hand over Kathryn’s, turned her head slightly and placed a kiss on the redhead’s palm. “Why did you use my human designation?”

Kathryn took a deep breath as she tried to verbalize her thoughts. “The Borg gave you a designation, a number. To them you were nothing but an automaton, something to be used and discarded once you were of no use to them. You’re so much more than that now. You have never been more human than you are right now, ” Kathryn replied, tenderly. “If you don’t like it, I won’t call you that again.”

“They assimilated me and my parents. They placed me in a maturation chamber until I was old enough to be of use. They cut off my arm and cut the eye out of my head.” She felt angry tears well up in her human eye and stood up abruptly, curling her Borg hand into a fist. “They stripped me of my humanity and my life! I don’t know how to be human because of them. Because of them, I don’t know how to... love you…” Her head dropped to her chest.

Kathryn stood up and gathered her in her arms, holding her tightly. “I’m so sorry, Annika, so sorry for what was taken from you.”

Annika returned her hug fiercely. “Thank you, Kathryn.” After a moment, she pulled away slightly, her hands on Kathryn’s hips. “They also gave. If it hadn’t been for the Borg, I never would have met you,” she said, with a small smile.

“I can’t deny that. Do you mind if I call you by your human name?”

“I was raised as Borg; I was born human. I will never be the Annika Hansen I would have grown up to be had I not been assimilated, but perhaps I can be the Annika Hansen I choose to be. You may call me Annika Seven.”

Janeway was aghast until she saw a gleam in the eyes looking back at her. She shook her head and laughed. “Sometimes, the things you say…”

“When we are alone, and not on duty, you may call me Annika.” Her smile lit the heart of a certain starship captain.

“Thank you. It’s late and we have a big day tomorrow. How are you feeling about it all?”

“I am apprehensive but I do not have ‘cold feet’. This is a good plan, Kathryn, and I think it will work. This is a big sacrifice for you. How are you feeling?”

“Like I’ve told you, Seven, I won’t let anyone hurt you. This is a big sacrifice for you, too. After we get to Earth, you’ll have so many new opportunities. A whole new world will open up for you. You’ll meet new people, make new friends and if things were different, you could meet someone special and have the chance at a real life, a real marriage... even children.” Kathryn hadn’t thought of that before. She had been so caught up in protecting her, she hadn’t thought at all about what Seven’s life could look like if there was no Section 31 to protect her from. 

Seven lifted Kathryn’s chin with a finger and looked at her intently. “Is it not a sacrifice for me to marry you.”

Kathryn almost believed her. “You say that now, Seven, but trust me, it’s a whole big world out there with a lot of people in it who are far better suited for you than I am.”

Seeing the doubt in Kathryn’s eyes, Seven kissed her lightly. “Then, you’ll just have to trust me. Isn’t that part of what marriage is?”

The compact redhead took a deep breath and forced a smile. “Yes, that’s part of what marriage is. I have to admit, I feel rather apprehensive, as well. We’re going to have to really sell it tomorrow.”

Seven scrunched her eyebrows downward, “Sell it?”

Kathryn ran a hand through her hair. “We’re going to have to look like we’re really in love with each other, make it believable. We can’t give anyone a reason to question the legitimacy of our marriage.”

Seven didn’t think it would be too much of a stretch for her. She was already half in love with her as it was. “I believe I can manage, Kathryn. Can you?”

Kathryn looked into Seven’s azure eyes and answered softly, “Yes, I can.”

  
  
  
  


Seven sat, impatiently, while Samantha Wildman applied the finishing touches on the bride-to-be’s hairdo, bringing a squeal of delight from Naomi. “Gee, Seven, you look so pretty!”

Naomi held a mirror up, giving Seven her first look. She barely recognized herself. “Do you think Kathryn will like it?” 

Naomi nodded wildly, “Yeah, Seven, she’s gonna love it. Won’t she, Mom?”

“Yes, Seven,” Samantha said, “Captain Janeway will be beside herself. You look beautiful.” Samantha’s warm eyes smiled.

B’Elanna stood back and admired their handiwork. “Damn, Borg, I’d marry you myself if we weren’t already taken. It’s gonna be a hell of a sight when the captain sees you walking down that aisle. Wildman,” she said, glancing at Samantha, “put me down for fifty ration slips that Janeway passes out.”

Samantha laughed and entered the bet on her PADD.

  
  
  


“For fuck sake, I don’t know who the hell designs these things,” Kathryn said, as she tugged at the collar of her dress whites.

“I believe you are experiencing ‘wedding day jitters,’” Tuvok said, as he smoothed a wrinkle on her shoulder. “Tom Paris wanted me to inform you that he is ‘keeping the motor running.’”

Kathryn threw back her head and laughed. “Inform Mr. Paris that I won’t be needing it.”

~~~

Chakotay stood in his dress uniform in front of his Captain and her best man. When Seven of Nine walked down the aisle, every head turned and gasps could be heard all throughout the mess hall. She was nothing short of a Goddess as she glided down the aisle in her white wedding dress, the beads around her trim waist caught the reflection of the candles along the aisle giving her the illusion of floating. Her hair cascaded down her shoulders like a stream of golden silk. 

Kathryn Janeway felt like a deer caught in headlights. She gulped in shaky breaths of air as she stared at the ethereal beauty coming toward her. Her vision started to dim as she swayed on rubbery legs.

Seven kept her eyes focused on the bright blue eyes and radiant smile of her Captain. Seven had always appreciated Janeway in her dress whites, but today the uniform seemed brighter and more official than it ever had. She saw Kathryn’s face go pale as she swayed unsteadily on her feet. In the back of her mind, she wondered how much B’Elanna might win from the betting pool and a tiny sound bubble up from her throat. She made a note to analyze it later, even though she was almost positive it was laugh.

Tuvok nodded to Chakotay and they stepped forward, each taking a hold of an elbow to help steady their stalwart Captain. She didn’t notice they were there, she was completely 

Seven smiled wider, feeling very satisfied that her bride managed to stay on her feet. She closed the distance between them and stood transfixed, lost in the depth of Kathyn’s eyes.

B’Elanna cleared her throat to signal Seven to hand over her bouquet. When Seven didn’t respond, B’Elanna cleared it again, in an over exaggerated way, giving her a little nudge, and took the bouquet from her hands as the guests chuckled.

“ _Voyager_ family,” Chakotay began, “we are here to pay tribute and bear witness to the happiest of occasions. Our very own Captain Kathryn Elizabeth Janeway and Annika Hansen have promised their love and lives to one another. Kathryn,” he said, turning to her, “your vows please.”

Kathryn cleared a throat that was suddenly too dry. 

“Seven, when you came to us, you were frightened, angry and confused. Over the past 10 years I have watched you grow into a remarkable human being, capable of an entire palette of rich depths and subtle hues. You infuriate me at times,” she chuckled, “you inspire me, and you ignite me in a way I’ve never known. You are my source of inspiration, the compass that steers me, and the light that guides my way. With you, I strive to be a better person. When I am without you, I long to fall into the colors that are uniquely you for only with you, am I enhanced. I can’t promise that there won’t be turbulence along the way, but I _can_ promise to stand fast as we navigate through them, to be steady and true, and to be your shelter from the storm. Today, in front of the _Voyager_ family, I pledge to love you, to honor you, and cherish you for the rest of my days,” she said, tears spilling from her eyes.

Silence filled the room. Chakotay cleared his throat and turned to Seven. “Seven, your vows, please.”

Seven took a steadying breath. “Kathryn, when you severed me from the collective, I threatened to kill you.” She cocked her head to the side and paused, “there are still occasions when I consider it.” She smiled brightly, and was vaguely aware of the soft laughter emanating from the guests. “I was _one_ . I was small. The silence was deafening. Over the past 10 years, you have helped me learn what it is to be an individual. Our path has not always been without incident but it has always been true. I am _one_ but I am no longer small. Because of your unwavering confidence in me, I have found the confidence within myself to become more. I promise to always love you, even when I am angry with you. I promise I will never leave you and I will always be a safe haven when you need one. I will always do my best to be patient with you when you are being unreasonable and I will always strive to be the best partner to you that I can be. I pledge to love you, to honor you, and to cherish you for the rest of my days.”

Sniffles could be heard throughout the ship.

“Captain Kathryn Elizabeth Janeway, do you take Annika Hansen, Seven of Nine, Tertiary Adjunct of Unimatrix Zero One, to be your lawfully wedded wife? To have and to hold from this day forward, forsaking all others and uniting only with her in mind, body, soul and spirit for as long as you both shall live?”

Kathryn swallowed the lump in her throat. “I do,” and then she slipped the ring on Seven’s finger.

“Annika Hansen, Seven of Nine, Tertiary Adjunct of Unimatrix Zero One, do you take Captain Kathryn Elizabeth Janeway to be your lawfully wedded wife? To have and to hold from this day forward, forsaking all others and uniting only with her in mind, body, soul and spirit for as long as you both shall live?”

Seven cocked her head and said, “Yes.” She was surprised to hear the catch in her voice. Her eyes glistened, as she slid the ring on Kathryn’s finger.

“By the authority vested in me by the United Federation of Planets, and as acting  
Captain of the Starship _Voyager_ , I now pronounce you legally married. You may seal your vows with a kiss.”

Kathryn slid her shaking hands over Seven’s shoulders and felt like she was drowning in the depth of the eyes looking back at her. She tilted her head back and brushed her lips over Seven’s. 

When Seven dipped her backwards, she instinctively tightened her hold and gasped as Seven’s lips met hers with a searing intensity. Seven's tongue reached out and gently licked Kathryn’s lower lip until Kathryn opened her mouth, inviting Seven to enter. 

She complied and their tongues danced in celebration. 

Just when Kathryn thought she might faint from the sheer pleasure of it, Seven stood her back up and beamed proudly. 

Kathryn stood there swaying and felt Seven’s arms tighten around her until she found her legs again. She was convinced that B’Elanna Torres was to blame for the dramatic flair. She made a mental note to thank her, later.

Chakotay had to shout over the roaring crowd and catcalls. “Ladies and Gentlemen, I give you Kathryn and Seven Janeway!”


	4. Part 4 - Finding Home

Soft Jazz music played and the holodeck was alight with candles when the newly married couple entered and waited in the doorway for the procession to begin. Janeway had a sneaking suspicion that all 141 crewmembers had managed to sneak through and offer well wishes and congratulations. When the procession finally ended, they were free to take their seats at the head table. 

Neelix had outdone himself with the feast. There was not one leola root dish to be seen along the long buffet table at the side of the room. When the captain granted him nearly unlimited replicator privileges, she had said to him, “After all, this is only going to happen once in my lifetime so make it good!” He got to work right away and it showed. Since the largest contingent of the crew was from Earth, he replicated only the finest of dishes, while making certain every other race was represented in the finest of fashions. Everything was laid out with grace and elegance, and he had truly outdone himself with the cake; it was nothing short of magnificent. 

When someone began tapping their glass with an eating utensil and the rest of the guests chimed in, Seven looked at Kathryn with a look of confusion on her face. 

Kathryn casually leaned over, slid her hand around the back of the young woman’s neck and pulled her in for a searing kiss. When it ended, Seven looked at Kathryn and smiled as the crowd roared in approval.

“When they do that Seven, it's tradition for the newlyweds to kiss.” Seeing Seven’s flash of confusion, she leaned over and whispered in her ear, “This is one of the occasions where kissing your spouse is acceptable in front of the crew. This is our day, Seven, we’re expected to be happy and affectionate.”

Seven nodded her understanding, grabbed her glass and fork, stood up and pounded the hell out of it, as the crowd broke into fits of laughter. Kathryn laughed, rolled her eyes, and kissed her thoroughly.

After everyone had eaten and the toasts were made, Chakotay announced the first dance of the evening. Seven’s face went white as she looked at Kathryn. Her last experience with dancing had resulted in her date having to report to sickbay. Kathryn stood and held out her hand to the frightened young woman, and smiled reassuringly. Seven took it and allowed herself to be led to the dance floor. 

When the music started, Kathryn wrapped her arms around Seven’s shoulders and pulled her close. She whispered in her ear, “Don’t worry, Annika, I’ve got you.” Seven wrapped her arms around Kathryn’s waist and relaxed into her. As they merged their bodies together in time with the music, everything else fell away, until it was only them. Alone. Lost in each other's eyes, and in the exquisite feeling of each other. Seven felt her heart catch in her throat as she lowered her head and captured Kathryn’s lips with a tenderness that both surprised and thrilled her. Kathryn wound her fingers through Seven’s hair and pulled her closer as her mouth became more demanding. The sound of whoops and whistles and catcalls brought them back to reality. 

The good Captain side stepped out of Seven’s arms, grinned proudly, and then took a sweeping bow. As for Seven of Nine, she pulled the Captain to her roughly, dipped her nearly to the floor, and kissed her thoroughly. The room interrupted in laughter and applause. Kathryn led her off of the dance floor looking very much like the cat who just ate the canary. The holographic band took their cue and started playing something everyone could dance to. 

Kathryn and Seven were kept quite busy as one crewman or another asked for a dance, leaving the slow numbers to the happy couple. The party was still going strong when they made their escape among the catcalls and cheers of the party goers.

Thanks to the generosity of her crew, Kathyrn and Seven didn’t have to go far to begin their life together. The crew had pooled their resources and gifted them with five full days of holodeck time on Tylos 3. When they stepped through the doors, Kathryn marveled at the re-creation. From the detail on the huge 4 poster bed to the eerie luminescent double moons. They even had a private balcony with a hot tub. A large basket of fruit awaited them, along with a chilled bottle of Gadrian Champagne. There were two small wrapped gifts sitting on the bed, as well as matching hers and hers robes. Near the entrance of the ensuite, was a small piece of luggage which, she presumed, had been delivered sometime after the ceremony.

She made a note to give special thanks to those who had given up their holodeck time to make it possible for them to have a lovely honeymoon. It was an exquisite gift.

Kathryn pulled off her dress tunic and hung it in the closet. The timeline on the wormhole had been hanging behind her eyes; she wanted to get it resolved so she could relax and enjoy her time off. “Before we settle in for the night, let’s get some business out of the way. How long before the bridge detects the wormhole? ”

“Approximately eight days,” Seven replied, as she shifted subconsciously to an attention posture. “However, the Astrometrics scanners will be able to detect it in approximately four.”

Kathryn nodded, “Then, we have that long to enjoy this. Did you delete all of the information from the initial scans? And what about the probe data?”

“Yes, on both counts. It is as if it never existed.” Seeing the pinched expression on Kathryn’s face, Seven stated, “You dislike tampering with the original data.” 

“Yes, but it can’t be helped. As long as we got married before the detection of the wormhole, they won’t have any reason to question it.”

Seven nodded, “You are correct. In addition, I believe we were very convincing tonight. Everyone on _Voyager_ believes we are in love.” Seven gave her a smug smile.

“I do believe you’re right. Now that that little bit of business is out of the way, I can relax and enjoy spending time with you without it nagging at me.” Kathryn sat down in the overstuffed chair and pulled her boots and socks off, wiggling her toes in the air. “I can’t remember the last time I danced so much.” She crossed her leg over her knee and massaged her foot, feeling the stress fall away and the fatigue set in.

Seven pulled the bottle of champagne out of the ice bucket, filled a glass and handed it to her wife.

Kathryn’s eyes sparkled as she took a small drink. “It’s been quite a day,” she said as she switched feet to give the other some much-needed relief. “I don’t know about you, but I’m ready to get out of this uniform and into something comfortable.” She put the suitcase on the rack and pulled out a pair of sweatpants and a loose shirt. 

“Kathryn, I would like to change as well and I need your help.” 

Seven looked even more ravishing than she did when she walked down the aisle. She had been a vision of perfection then, but now, her hair was a bit tousled from all of the dancing and her cheeks had a healthy pink glow. Kathryn felt a tingle at the prospect of undressing her wife for the first time and took another sip of champagne. 

“There’s some stuff in that bag there, if you want to pick out something to change into.” 

Seven picked her clothing out and laid it on the bed, keeping her back to Kathryn.

“It’s inefficient to wear a garment one can’t remove by themself.” Seven remarked.

“Oh, it’s not so inefficient, if you think about it,” Kathryn said, stepping up to Seven. She slid one finger over the buttons, starting at the small of her back until she reached a button just between her shoulder blades, popping the pearl button loose from its eye. And, then the next one, letting her finger move slowly over Seven’s skin. “Only ten more to go,” she purred. 

Seven closed her eyes and concentrated on the feel of Kathryn’s fingers caressing her skin, as she moved from button to button.

“Last one, Annika.”

Seven’s respiration had increased 1.3 percent. Kathryn slowly ran her hands up Seven’s back, and slid the gown off of her shoulders. She leaned up and whispered in her ear, “Do you still think it’s inefficient?”

Seven’s pulse jumped. “No.” Seven was sorely disappointed when Kathryn excused herself and went into the ensuite.

Kathryn stood taking deep breaths. If she allowed things to progress, what’s the worst that could happen? Seven said that she would have to trust her. Kathryn trusted Justin and he ended up dead. She trusted Mark and he married someone else. But… she was only engaged to them. She looked at the rings on her left hand, her wedding rings. She smiled when she remembered how Seven had gotten down on one knee before she slipped the engagement ring on her finger, and now, there was a wedding band to complement it. She moved her hand this way and that, marveling at how the diamonds inset into the band, sparkled under the lights. She was married. The fact that it was a marriage in name only, was lost on her for a moment. They had taken vows to have and to hold, forsaking all others. In the ten years she had known Seven, she had always been brutally honest. Seven had asked for her trust, and she was going to give it. She had faced some of the most terrifying enemies in the Delta Quadrant yet, she realized, there was still one more, latently prowling, just behind her eyes. She took a deep breath, closed her eyes, straightened her spine, and then glowered at her fear. The beast knew her well and wasn’t going to go without a fight. She narrowed her eyes, curling a corner of her upper lip into a snarl, daring it to do its best. It stood fast for a moment more, then skulked away quickly...defeated. She knew it would be back, but for now, she would take the victory. 

Seven stood on the balcony, looking up at the twin moons. The actual Tylos 3, like most other planets with dual satellites, had been devastated when their orbit decayed, causing them to collide in a massive explosion. The heavy particles left behind eventually formed an accretion disk around the planet. The entire process took billions of years from the time the planet had formed to the time of its demise. It was now a volcanic mass, stripped of its atmosphere, stripped of its oceans, and void of all life. All that remained of the once lauded and storied culture lay trapped in a data crystal. She heard Kathryn coming and turned her head to look at her. Something was different. She tilted her head and studied the woman. It was in her eyes, and in the way she carried herself. She had reached a decision about something.

“This planet was beautiful once,” Kathryn said, quietly. “It’s a shame about the moons colliding.” She looked up at the holographic representation and sighed. “The legend goes that the smaller moon, Ath’na and the larger one, Ie’ogra, were once one planetary body. When this system was forming, the gravity of a very large planet pulled it in and they collided, splitting into two. The largest body became Tylos 3 and the other two, trapped in its gravity, became Ath’na and Ie’orga. Because they didn’t want to be apart from one another, their own gravity drew them back together. After the explosion, what was left of them became the rings around the planet, a symbol of their unwavering commitment to each other.” 

“That legend is inaccurate. Planetary bodies are not sentient. What is left of the moons is now orbiting what is left of Tylos 3. The orbit of the planet shifted when the moons exploded and will eventually end up being flung into space, or pulled into the red dwarf it orbits,” Seven’s eyes wandered to Kathryn’s.

“It's inaccurate from a scientific point of view, but it’s a legend about romance,” Kathryn said with a small smile.

“I fail to see what gravity, collisions, and explosions have to do with romance. Ath’na and Ie’ogra were destroyed. The planet they orbited was destroyed. Are you saying that romance is a destructive force?” Seven pulled her eyebrows up.

Kathryn curled the corners of her lips up. “Not exactly. Would you like some champagne?” She fully expected to get the standard response about alcohol impairing her cortical function and was pleasantly surprised when she said yes. She padded into the suite, filled their glasses and returned to the patio, casually handing one to Seven.

“It’s been a big day. We’re married, Annika.” The corners of her eyes crinkled. 

“That was the purpose, was it not, Kathryn?” She quirked her eyebrow before taking a drink.

“It was.” Kathryn looked down at her toes. “I guess it’s started to dawn on me what it all might mean.”

“What might it mean, Kathryn?” Annika stepped closer to her.

Kathryn held up her hand, showing Seven her ring finger, “That these rings are the symbol of our commitment to one another. It means no matter how deeply ingrained some of my irrational fears are, I owe it to you, and to myself, to move beyond those things. I owe it to myself, and to you, to see what could develop between us… ” she suddenly found something on the ground worthy of her attention, “if this...could be a true marriage rather than the operation it started out to be…”

Seven paused to consider, and then ran her index finger over Kathryn’s cheek. She thought she was beginning to understand. “Gravity drew us together.” Seven stepped closer.

Kathryn looked at her wife and nodded, because the lump in her throat wouldn’t allow her to speak. 

“In my research of marriage, I came across a study in regard to an old Earth tradition, that many alien societies practice as well, called an arranged marriage. It’s when two people, many times strangers, are chosen for one another by their parents or tribal elders. Those marriages endure because marriage isn’t necessarily about love, it’s about choosing to honor the commitment to one another, even when one may not particularly want to. The study asserted that open communication is a key factor, especially when one is afraid. 93.7 percent of those couples ‘grew’ to love each other.” She stepped closer and wrapped her arms around Kathryn’s waist. “Do you believe we could grow to love one another...to ‘fall in love’?’”

Kathryn cupped Seven’s face as her eyes lit up. “I wasn’t sure until a little bit ago, until I realized what our rings really mean. Yes, Annika, I believe we could grow to love one another one day, but even if we don’t, I’ll do my best to communicate with you, even when I am feeling vulnerable, and I’ll honor our commitment for as long as you’ll have me.”

Seven’s lips curved up slightly. “Even though I still feel awkward about kissing you?”

Kathryn narrowed her eyes playfully and waggled her eyebrows. “You know what they say, darling, practice makes perfect.” 

Seven leaned her head down, opened her mouth slightly and gently, slowly enveloped Kathryn’s bottom lip. Her tongue flicked softly as Kathryn’s mouth responded. She swirled her tongue gently around Kathryn’s and nibbled on her delicate lip, sucking it into her mouth before sliding her tongue into Kathryn's mouth again. She slid her hands to the small of Kathryn’s back and down over the curves of her backside. She squeezed the firm muscles, making Kathryn moan into her mouth. Curious to see if she could make Kathryn moan again, she repeated the action, and got the same result. She loved making the strong, steady Captain moan. Wondering what else might make Kathryn educe that glorious sound, she slid her hands up the sides of her hips, to the sides of her waist, brushing her hands against the sides of Kathryn’s breasts. Another moan.

Kathryn entwined her fingers in Seven’s hair and roughly pulled her closer, eliciting a deep groan from somewhere inside of the one the crew called the ‘Ice Queen’. Kathryn let go of Seven’s hair, grabbed her by her hips, and pulled. She tore her mouth from Seven's and snaked her tongue along the perfection that was her neck, eliciting another moan from her beautiful wife. She fluttered her tongue lower on Seven’s neck, leaving a trail of lingering heat in her wake, and bit down gently on her shoulder. Her hungry hands slipped their way along her sides, down her hips and around to the round globes that fit so perfectly in her hands. She tugged Seven closer to her and moaned when she heard Seven gasp.

"Kathryn..." she panted. "My legs are ceasing to function..." 

Kathryn pushed her gently into their suite, and sat her on the edge of the bed. She straddled her, settling on her lap to continue her assault on Seven's neck. Seven's breath was coming faster. Kathryn slid her tongue up her neck and captured her earlobe in her teeth, giving it a gentle nip before kissing her mouth again. Kathryn's hips began to rock back and forth; Seven's rose to meet her.

"My god, Annika..." She whispered in her ear. Seven moaned and thrust her hips harder into Kathryn. 

Kathryn's hips rocked faster. "Tell me what you want, Annika... oh god...." She ground down harder. 

Seven answered her by grabbing a handful of her hair and pulling her mouth away from her neck. She wrapped her arms around Kathryn, scooted them backwards and laid back on the bed, pulling Kathryn on top of her. She pulled Kathryn's neck to her mouth and began to lick her with a frenzied passion. Once her neck was nice and slick, Seven grazed her with her teeth sucking as she went.

"Oh god, Annika, I’m on fire." Every nerve ending begged for Seven's touch. Getting to her knees, she pushed Seven's legs apart and straddled a powerful thigh. As soon as she felt the contact, a groan escaped her. She pushed her hips hard into Seven and felt Seven rise to meet her. She could feel the juncture between Seven's legs and gave a sensuous thrust against Seven's center.

Seven gasped and let out a low moan as she felt Kathryn against her. She pushed her hips up, wanting more, but Kathryn backed away. Kathryn thrust against her again... and backed away. Each time Kathryn thrust, Seven felt a white hot need begging for attention. Seven grabbed Kathryn's buttocks and pulled her into her, hoping to ease the ache between her legs. 

Kathryn captured Seven's mouth in a searing kiss while their hips continued to undulate against each other. She pulled away and looked deeply into Seven eyes. She saw a deep need, and most of all, trust.

She slowed her movement and gazed into Seven's eyes. Every slow thrust made Seven gasp but she never took her eyes off of Kathryn's.

Kathryn slowly thrust into her again and Seven's mouth fell open as she groaned. She could see the hunger in Seven's eyes; it set her soul on fire. She continued to grind her leg against Seven as she leaned to one side to free up her hand. She pushed her torso up and slid her hand along Seven's shoulder, down to her chest, and then between her breasts. Seven nodded but wasn't sure why. Kathryn slowly moved her hand over Seven's breast and felt Seven's nipple straining against her T-shirt. She flicked it gently and saw Seven's eyes go wide as her breath caught. Kathryn bent down and kissed her so gently it was like a whisper. "Seven, we can stop if you want to. We don't have to do this, if you’re not ready."

Seven shook her head. "I want... I trust you, Kathryn."

Kathryn rolled onto her side and pressed her lips against Seven’s, hard, slipping her tongue inside, savoring the taste of her mouth. She teased the tongue that slid against hers, sliding it out of Seven’t mouth until Seven whimpered in protest, and slid it back in, making the younger woman moan. Kathryn slowly rolled onto her back to allow her wife free access.

“What do you want to do, Annika?” she asked between ragged breaths.

Seven looked at her with eyes, burning with desire, “I want to touch you.”

“Then touch me,” she breathed.

Seven reached her hand up and placed it on Kathryn’s chest, “Your heart is pounding,” she whispered as she slid her hand slowly over Kathryn’s breast until it filled her hand. “You feel so good, Kathryn.” She gave it a gentle squeeze and watched as Kathryn gasped, her eyes riveted on Seven’s. She felt Kathryn’s hard nipple pressing into the palm of her hand and flicked her finger over it, feeling a shiver run down her spine when Kathryn whimpered and arched her back, silently begging for more. Kathryn sucked in a sharp breath when she saw a predatory smile crawl across Seven’s face. Frustrated that there was something in her way, she flicked her wrist and engaged her cutting tool, quickly slicing Kathryn’s shirt open from the neck down. Kathryn’s eyes opened wide as she whimpered. Seven drank in the beauty of Kathryn’s breasts, and marveled at how hard her nipples were. She flicked one with her finger while her mouth captured the other and felt a sharp need land between her legs when Kathryn cried out. 

“Oh god, Annika, I can’t take much more,” she whispered, “all you’ll have to do is touch me once and I’ll be done for.”

Seven inhaled and could smell the scent of her arousal, her need, and followed where the scent led her. Kathryn pushed her pants down and spread her legs wide, guiding Seven’s head lower. Quickly assessing the logistics, Seven got up, grabbed Kathryn by her thighs, slid her to the edge of the bed and then knelt on the floor in front of her, jerking her sweatpants off in one swift motion. Kathryn’s pink flesh was engorged and glistening, and it held Seven captive. She quickly ran a finger along the slick folds and up to the engorged bundle of flesh that pulsated from her touch. Kathryn’s hips raised up frantically, as she cried out, “Oh god…yes…put your mouth on me, Annika...please… ” Seven was more than happy to comply. She ran her tongue from the bottom to the top and sucked Kathryn into her mouth. Kathryn was moaning louder and faster as her hips thrust hard against Seven’s mouth. Kathryn’s entire body went tense as one long moan turned into her name, “Annika!”

Seven continued to lick her gently until her body went limp and then she scooped her up in her arms to kiss her tenderly.

Kathryn wrapped her arms around Seven, buried her face against her neck, and wept. “Kathryn, did I hurt you? Why are you crying?”

“Oh, Annika, I’m crying because that was the most beautiful experience of my life.” Kathryn lifted her head and looked at her beautiful spouse. Seven was positively glowing, and still hungry. Kathryn kissed her tenderly, savoring the taste of herself on Seven’s mouth. “Darling,” she purred, “you can put me down now.”

Seven climbed onto the bed, still cradling Kathryn in her arms, and then laid her down gently, gazing into the fiery blue pools looking back at her.

Kathryn got up on her knees and lifted Seven’s shirt over her head, and then slid her pants down. She gave her a feral grin and kissed her deeply, hungrily, moaning intermittently. She pushed Seven onto her back and tossed her pants on the floor. Noticing the packages that had, somehow, managed to stay on the bed, she tossed those, too. She locked her eyes on her prize, and slowly climbed up the length of her body, settling her thigh against Seven’s wet center and sensuously thrust against her, causing a groan to erupt from the blonde. She bent her head down and sucked a nipple into her mouth, gently nibbling, and sucking while Seven rocked her hips against her thigh. “Oh Kathryn…” 

She bit down, just shy of causing pain and Seven cried out and rocked her hips harder and faster. “Raise your leg for me, Annika, I want to come with you,” she groaned, before sucking her nipple into her mouth again, alternating between flicks, nibbles, and an occasional bite. Seven brought her leg up and groaned when she felt Kathryn’s wetness sliding against her. Kathryn was moving in time with Seven, harder and faster.

Seven felt a delicious heat suffuse her body and her vagina felt like nothing she had ever experienced before; the tingling kept getting more and more intense. She couldn’t stop moaning. She opened her eyes to the rapturous expression on Kathryn’s face, her heavily lidded eyes, burning with an intensity Seven had never seen before. When the explosion happened, it was a white-hot, sizzling fury.

  
  


Kathryn was panting with need as she kept pace, never breaking eye contact. “Oh god... oh god, yes…” Kathryn collapsed onto Seven and kissed her with a groaning intensity, then she studied her. Her beautiful mouth was slightly open as she pulled in shaky breaths and her eyes were shining with the moisture of unshed tears. 

“Kathryn, I understand now… about the moons exploding.”

Kathryn kissed her tenderly, “I know you do, darling.”

  
  
  
  


The morning found them tangled in each other. Janeway woke first and looked at the sleeping form lying half on her. The sweet innocence of it made her heart leap in her chest. She had just spent the first night of her married life making the most passionate and intense love she had ever experienced. 

  
  
  


Her bladder was painfully full but she didn’t want to move quite yet. Instead, she studied Seven openly, just has she had so many times when Seven was regenerating. Her eyes raked over the alabaster skin that was so smooth and soft, then up to the eyelashes which were unbelievably long. They were such a light blonde color that the length was indistinguishable without close inspection. She looked at her nose, straight and feminine, and then her shoulders, one of which bore an implant from her days with the Borg Collective. Kathryn reached out and caressed it gently, finding it warm and supple. It was then that Seven’s eyes fluttered open and alarm registered in her eyes.

“What is it, honey? What’s wrong?” Kathryn was contemplating contacting the EMH when Seven finally answered.

“I don’t feel right. When I regenerate, I awake feeling clear-headed and energized. My head does not feel clear, nor do I feel energized.”

Kathryn chuckled. “That’s normal, Seven. Sometimes, it takes a while to wake up after sleeping. Very few people spring out of bed the way you spring out of your alcove.”

She instinctively rubbed the sleep out of her eyes. “I don’t think I like sleeping, Kathryn.”

Kathryn hugged her close. “I love sleeping, it’s the waking up part I detest.” She said with a grin.

“Yes, you may be correct that it is the waking I do not like.”

  
  


Kathryn untangled herself and took care of her morning needs. Seven cocked her head as she heard the stream hit the toilet bowl and then heard a distinct noise coming from the same direction. 

When she asked Kathryn about it, her face took on a slight pink hue. “It’s called gas, Seven.”

“Ah, yes. The body produces gasses as it digests the nutrients from the food consumed. It is expelled from the rectum. I had no idea it made noise.”

“Well, get used to it, Seven. More often than not, it produces an odor, too.” Kathryn blushed even more. “Phoebe and I used to be merciless with each other, especially when we had to bunk together.” She couldn’t help but laugh at the memories that bubbled to the surface. 

“It’s a normal biological function. I, too, would do it if my abdominal implant did not take care of those particular bodily functions for me.”

“Well, it’s not something a Captain can do in public so keep it to yourself will you?”

“B’Elanna will be disappointed, but yes, I will keep all of your secrets to myself.”

Kathryn was about to launch into a spectacular speech about certain proprieties when she noticed the sparkle in Seven’s eyes. “Did you just crack a joke?”

Seven smiled. “I believe I did.”

Kathryn happened to notice the two wrapped packages she had flung off of the bed the night before and had to smile at why they ended up on the floor. When she first severed Seven from the collective, she never dreamed she would end up looking at her the way she was now. Seven was still tangled up in the sheets, with her hair mussed in the most delightful way, and her full lips looked even fuller. She cocked her lips into a grin, feeling more than a little proud of herself. She picked them up, placed them in front of Seven, and then climbed in beside her.

Seven was warmed by the prospect that someone had gotten them another gift. “Can we open them, Kathryn?” she looked at her wife with childlike excitement. Kathryn nodded, taking great pleasure in seeing her wife looking so happy.

Seven picked the first one up and looked it over thoroughly. “Who’s it from? There’s no card.” She examined the package from every angle and there was no indication, whatsoever.

“That’s curious; go ahead and open them. Maybe that’ll give us an idea,” she said, with a smile.

Seven tore open the paper and opened the box. After further examination, handed it to Kathryn. “I believe this is for you.”

“Thank you, darling.” Kathryn’s eyes grew wide and she paled slightly when she saw the pair of bikini underwear which said, in big bold letters, “100% Organic.”

Seven opened the next package and furrowed her brows. “I understand these are undergarments, however, I don’t know what this means,” she said, handing it to Kathryn, who felt every drop of blood in her body rush to her face. “Uhhh, ‘all you can eat’ is when you can go back to the buffet anytime you like and get more,” she answered, thinking she may have to reconsider her decision not to bust B’Elanna Torres down to crewman over her actions on the night of their respective bachelor parties.

“Our wedding reception, that was an all you can eat buffet, was it not?” Seven asked, her head tilted to one side. Kathryn, knowing her face was still beet red, simply nodded her head and began to realize exactly how much trouble she was going to be in as she watched the comprehension slowly creep across Seven’s face. The younger woman’s mouth curled up into a predatory grin as she advanced upon Kathryn. “Are you hungry now, Wife?”

The look of raw desire in Seven’s eyes caused all of the blood in her head to rush to other places. Kathryn got a wicked gleam in her eyes and responded, “I could eat. Would you like me to order room service?” 

“That depends, Kathryn,” she said, prowling closer, “are you on the menu?”

Kathryn let out a low, husky groan just before Seven pounced. There was nothing gentle in the way their mouths met. It was a raw, visceral need. Kathryn ran her fingertips along the sides of Seven's head and gathered the blonde hair in her fists, pulling her closer. Their tongues were tangling and their moans were intermingled, driving the need even deeper.

Seven wrapped her arms around Kathryn’s waist and quickly rolled Kathryn on top of her, keeping the smaller woman’s torso upright. She shoved her thigh between Kathryn’s legs and untied the belt of the robe Kathryn had on and quickly divested her of it. Her hands went immediately to Kathryn’s breasts, whose nipples were hard enough to slice through duranium. Seven pulled Kathryn’s shoulders low enough to take a nipple into her mouth, circling it with her tongue before nibbling on it. Kathryn was watching her through lidded eyes, as Seven gorged herself on the tender flesh.

Kathryn kept herself propped up on her hands while she pulled one breast out of Seven’s mouth, in order to replace the other, all the while, gyrating her hips slowly against her new lover. Everything in her wanted to let go and just allow herself to be swept away in the moment. At that very moment, Seven opened her eyes and looked at her, shattering all self-control. She whimpered and moaned, as she allowed herself the freedom to be with Seven the way she felt it, and started thrusting with wild abandon. 

“Annika…” she grunted, “I need to touch you…” Seven rolled Kathryn off of her and onto her side, capturing her mouth in a bruising kiss. 

Kathryn trailed her hand along Seven’s side, noting the feel of the abdominal bands, which wrapped around the former Borg’s torso, and then over her hip to the juncture between her legs. Seven bent her knee toward the ceiling in order to grant Kathryn access. As Kathryn slid her finger along the swollen flesh, she buried her head against Seven’s neck and choked back an unbidden sob. 

  
  


“My god...you’re so wet…” she murmured when she found her voice again.

Seven sucked in a breath and whispered in response, “All for you, Kathryn...only for you…” then she reached her hand down to touch Kathryn in the same way she was being touched. She let go of a long moan when she felt the copious moisture, making Kathryn slick and hot. She mimicked what Kathryn was doing to her body, and it didn’t take the older woman long to figure it out. She deliberately slowed her pace; Seven matched it. She gently squeezed Seven’s engorged knot of flesh; Seven squeezed Kathryn’s in response. Kathryn slowly and carefully entered her and Seven’s hips went wild. Seven, in turn, entered Kathryn and got much the same response. Kathryn buried her tongue in Seven’s mouth, grunting with every thrust and Seven was happy to respond. Kathryn tore her mouth away and buried it in Seven’s neck, licking and sucking the younger woman into a frenzy.

“Kathryn,” she panted, “I…”

Kathryn knew. She slipped another finger inside her, never missing a beat. Seven did the same. “Oh god....Annika….more… ” she pleaded. Seven sent a command to her Borg enhanced hand and her fingers transformed into a modified versa-tool, a little longer than her fingers and twice as thick with a rounded tip. 

“Oh god, Annika...is that your Borg enhancement?” 

“Yes,” Seven whispered.

She groaned. Kathryn felt Seven filling her and a lightning hot shudder shook her from the bottom of her feet to the top of her head. Seven switched her pacing to give Kathryn’s body time to adjust, making long, languorous strokes.

Kathryn tossed her head back and growled. 

The husky sound urged Seven into a faster pace, and she started to flick her thumb against Kathryn’s clitoris, driving Kathryn’s hips into a frenzy. “Oh Jesus, Annika....” Kathryn moaned between thrusts, “I want to come for you...darling...make me come all over you…”

Seven issued a primal, guttural sound and thrust harder, faster until Kathryn was grunting her need in Seven’s ear, while staying in time as she thrust into Seven. Kathryn felt the delicious heat building as her body rode higher on the crest. Seven was moaning louder as her own climax was drawing near.

“Chakotay to Janeway”

“Goddamnit! FUCK FUCK FUCK!” Captain Janeway slowed, but never stilled her fingers in Seven, which only added to Seven’s state of arousal. Kathryn gave her a quick look and Seven tried to force herself to be quiet. When Kathryn fluttered her thumb over her engorged clitoris, she couldn’t help it when a quiet groan escaped. Feeling particularly naughty, Seven made her enhancement pulse several times.

“Janeway here!” She was too far gone to pretend not to be pissed as hell by the intrusion.

“I apologize for the intrusion, Captain, but Astrometric sensors have just picked up something I think you’re gonna wanna take a look at,” 

“Chakotay,” her tone was clipped and dangerous, “is my ship being fired upon?” She fought to suppress a moan.

“No, ma’am.”

“Is my ship being pulled into a black hole or otherwise in mortal danger?” She asked, with barely concealed rage.

“No, ma’am.”

“Then, I suggest you save your interruptions,” she said, lowering her vocal register even more, “for when it IS!” 

Kathryn gave Seven a feral smile, a low growl, and then started thrusting inside of her, passionately, picking up the pace where she had left off. Seven picked up the que from her wife and responded in kind, giving her long, hard, fast strokes. “Oh god, Annika...yes…oh god...” she said, in between moans. “Kathryn… harder… faster… ” Seven whimpered. 

  
  


The disembodied voice of Tuvok said, “Computer, close com-link.” Neither of them heard it. 

  
  


Kathryn held on to Seven, pulling her close as her orgasm crashed over her, leaving her whimpering and shaking. Seven shut her eyes tightly, and her body went rigid as wave after wave of sensation washed over her. “Kathryn!” she cried out, and then collapsed in a heap. 

Kathryn curled up in Seven’s arms, waiting for her breathing to regulate, still shuddering from the aftershocks of her orgasm. Seven was still moaning and shuddering, and Kathyn pulled her closer. “Darling, in spite of that little bit of coitus interruptus, that was amazing.”

“Will it always be this wonderful, Kathryn?” Seven asked, in between moans and shudders.

“No, darling, it will get better. The more we get to know each other’s bodies, likes and dislikes, the better it will get. It’s like that old adage, “practice makes perfect.”

She saw Seven’s eyes go wide with amazement and laughed. She started to untangle herself despite the protests of her wife. 

“Come on. We’d better get down there; looks like they found the wormhole early.”

The couple stepped into the shower, setting it for the sonic setting. Kathryn gritted her teeth and tolerated the abhorrent sound of it. After some initial confusion, Seven stepped into her new panties, slipped a pair of black pants over them, and put on an indigo blouse.

Kathryn shrugged into a cream-colored blouse and gray pants, took Seven by the hand, and headed for Astrometrics. Once in the turbolift, Seven plastered herself against Kathryn, nibbling and flicking her tongue inside of her mouth. She grabbed Kathryn by the behind, pulling her roughly against her mound, gyrating against her in a very un-Borg like fashion. Just before the ‘lift door opened, the ladies stepped away from each other, still reeling.

The doors to Astrometrics were sealed with high-level Federation codes. Janeway overrode the code and the doors slid open to reveal Harry Kim, Chakotay, B’Elanna Torres, and Tuvok. They whipped their heads around to see who had just entered. Harry Kim took one look at the couple and blushed a deep crimson, returning to his scans immediately. He resisted the urge to gouge his eyeballs out, but only because he needed them to do his job. He, instead, started a mantra in his head. _I didn’t see anything. I didn’t hear anything. They were never here._

Tuvok raised an eyebrow but was otherwise nonplussed. Chakotay had the good grace to look ashamed of himself, and B’Elanna was grinning from ear to ear. She couldn’t keep the knowing look of amusement out of her eyes, but still stinging from the dressing down, she managed to keep her mouth shut, albeit, with much difficulty. 

Both of the women looked flushed and disheveled, but more so, Janeway. Her normally tidy hairdo looked very much like it had just had fingers running through it and her shirt was slightly untucked on one side, not to mention one of her buttons was missing. Seven, now in her typical Borg stance, stood beside her wife with random tendrils of hair bouncing down from her normally pristine hairstyle. A healthy, pink glow suffused her normally pale skin and, as B’Elanna studied further, she saw a large hickey on the pristine skin, just below her earlobe, toward the back of her neck. She couldn’t keep a half snort from erupting from her. 

“Report.” Janeway snapped, the whip of command crackling in her voice.

Chakotay, feeling her eyes burning into him, asked Harry to pull up the sensor data.

“B’Elanna thought this might be a good time to go ahead and boost the department's power allotment again to scan for dilithium. When Harry ran the scans, he found this.” Chakotay said, trying to hide the slight quiver in his voice. 

The viewscreen came to life with an image of a faint, swirling mass, off their port bow.

Janeway leveled a gaze at him. “And?” she said, waiting for further information.

Chakotay, still feeling a bit raw from the com-link intrusion, said, “I thought you would want to be informed. It could be a wormhole, Captain.”

Janeway put her hands on her hips and started circling him. “And, it could be a coffee nebula. Has anyone launched a probe?” She asked, in an acidic tone, never stopping the walk around of Chakotay. 

“I’m configuring a probe now, Captain.” Harry chimed in, still keeping his eyes on his board. 

“Well, it looks like you have things well in hand here, _Mister_ Chakotay,” Janeway said, missing the obvious pun, “hardly worth disturbing a woman on her honeymoon without further data, wouldn’t you agree, _Commander_ Tuvok?”

“Indeed, Captain.”

She stopped in front of Chakotay and leveled a force eight glare straight into his eyes and spoke in a dangerous tone, “The next time you see fit to disturb me, you had better consider the purpose of a honeymoon and make goddamned sure it’s worth it. Do I make myself perfectly clear?”

With a faint blush rising to his face, the big man snapped his spine to attention and answered in a croak, “Yes, ma’am.”

“When you have something definitive to report, you know where I’ll be.” Janeway turned on her heel and walked out, with Seven in tow.

B’Elanna couldn’t hold it in any longer and let a Klingon howl of laughter rip through the thick air.

Chakotay looked pointedly between B’Elanna and Harry. “Not one word of this, any of it, leaves this room and that’s an order.”

When they arrived back at their suite, Kathryn shrugged out of her clothes, leaving a trail behind her. “I hate that sonic setting, it makes my teeth vibrate. I’m going to have a real shower. After that, maybe we can order something to eat,” she called over her shoulder, on the way to the ensuite, ''I'm famished.”

Seven stood there feeling rather dumbfounded. Kathryn had just taken off all of her clothes as casually as one might take off a piece of outerwear. She was on her way to ask why that was when her Borg enhanced hearing happened to pick up very out of tune vocalization being sung very quietly, _“She sent a command to her borg enhanced hand --- and filled me right up to the brim --- she made love so sweet --- that she put me in heat ---I could do it all night --- holy christ, what a sight! --- darlin’ fuck me so hard I can’t see!_

_Ohhhh there once was a Cap’n named Katie, knew --- a Borg who looked like Aphrodite --- she married the girl and she gave her a twirl --- now she can’t get enough of her pastry._

_Oh oh Seven, my dove --- were you sent from above --- you have beautiful eyes and_

_creamy white thighs --- and you make me feel --- oh so beautiful --- I’d marry you again any day---”_

Seven stopped dead in her tracks. That cadence was familiar. Was there something about a lady of beauty? A woman named Katie? Such good luck? Try as she might, she couldn’t get the fragments of memory to collate. That’s when she realized what Kathryn was singing about, oh so quietly. If it hadn’t been for her Borg enhanced hearing, she wouldn’t have heard it at all. She tilted her head and ran an internal diagnostic; she was sure her heart skipped a few beats but she was functioning within normal parameters. Perhaps she needed to go see the doctor after their honeymoon. She would talk to Kathryn about it. Unsure of what to do next, she searched her cortical node for North American poetry, noting pentameter, themes and rhyming schemes. She smiled softly as she removed her clothes and laid them neatly over the back of the chair.

Kathryn was still singing quietly to herself, her hair lathered up with shampoo, and so her eyes were shut. Seven stepped into the shower and slid her hands up Kathryn’s stomach to cup her firm breasts.

Kathryn jumped and made a very undignified squeaking sound. Turning around quickly, she said, “Jesus H. Christ, Seven, you scared the hell out of me!” Seeing a flash of hurt shade her eyes, she chuckled softly and pulled her in for a hug. 

“I apologize, Kathryn, I didn’t mean to scare you,” a touch of hurt colored her voice.

“I know you didn’t, honey.” She felt a warm glow wrapping itself around her when she looked into the cerulean eyes of her wife. “Did you need something?” She asked, still smiling.

“Yes,” she said with a smirk. “You realize I have Borg enhanced hearing, correct?”

Not exactly sure where it was going, Kathyrn cautiously said, “Uh huh?” while leaving unspoken questions hanging in the air.

“And,” Seven began, “I didn’t mean to be intrusive on your shower time.”

Still confused, Kathryn lifted her brows in the way that one does when waiting for more information.

“I heard you singing.”

Kathryn’s head dropped to her chest, shaking it back and forth slowly, and then her shoulders started to shake. “I’m sorry you had to be subjected to that, Seven,” she said raising her head. Her eyes were sparkling and little guffaws were bubbling to the surface. “It’s a game Phoebe and I used to play. We try to outdo one another be it by foul language or just sheer nastiness. It’s also a very popular game at the academy. I do it when I’m happy because it reminds me of home, but, honestly...I have a terrible singing voice…” She started cracking up, “and the vocabulary of a drunk sailor on shore leave. ”

Seven beamed at her, feeling incredibly special that Kathryn was allowing her to see the parts of her that she would never show anyone else, parts that had to stay buried for the good of her ship. She had no peers to relax or ‘cut loose’ with and now, they were equals.

Suddenly, Seven’s abdomen contracted and a loud noise came unbidden, out of her mouth. Then, it happened again. Kathryn looked at her with a wide smile and said, “Seven. You’re laughing!”

Seven’s eyes widened at the surprise of it, making Kathryn laugh even harder. She grabbed her stomach and doubled over, not being able to stop herself. Seven relaxed and let herself join in.

Between guffaws, Seven thought she could make out something like, ‘the secret life of Kathryn Janewaaaayyyyyyyyyyyy. Who would ever guess I’m a foul mouthed, hard drinkin, pervy ‘ole broad!”

Still chuckling, Seven retorted, “I have already surmised the ‘hard drinkin’ part. I am learning about the ‘pervy’ part and a ‘foul mouth’ is of no consequence to me. You are not old...or ‘broad.’”

This made Kathryn laugh even harder. “Oh, Seven, you are such a joy.” She looked up at her and wanted to drown in her eyes, and would have until she remembered that Seven was in the middle of explaining something when she had busted a gut. “Now that I can speak again, you were saying there was a reason for you coming in here, not that you need one…”

Seven smiled brightly and began, “There once was a woman named Seven --- who thought Kathryn resided in heaven --- She kissed her one time --- found it was so sublime --- And she likes the way --- her hair’s in disarray --- when her moaning drives Seven to heaven.”

Kathryn laughed, “That’s not bad for a first attempt, darling. I have a feeling you’ll give Phoebe a run for her money when we get home. Care to wash my back?” She grinned wickedly.

  
  


~~~

  
  


After they had some much needed food, they went for a long walk along the purple sand beaches. Kathryn held Seven’s hand as she talked more about her childhood in Indiana. “You’d like Mom, she’s a mathematician. Although, she gave it all up when she married daddy. She didn’t have to; she chose to because she wanted, more than anything, to be a mother and raise her kids in a traditional settlement. Hell, they don’t even have transporters there. You and Mom would have a lot to talk about with mathematical theories. Once you two got going, I would probably never see you again,” she said with a grin.

“I highly doubt that Kathryn. There isn’t much that would keep me from you.”

Kathryn swung their arms back and forth in an exaggerated arc, staring down at the sand while they walked. “I’m happy to hear you say that, Annika. I don’t think that there’s a lot that would keep me from you, either,” she said, as she swung their arms up and twirled herself under Seven’s arm, coming to rest against her. “Would you like to dangle your toes in the ocean for a bit?”

Seven’s lips curved up. “When you smile at me like that, there’s nothing I would refuse you.”

“Likewise, Seven. Your smile leaves me breathless.”

They kicked off their shoes and Seven stood, ankle deep, in the ocean, feeling her heart smile as she watched Kathryn laugh and play tag with the surf, as it came in and receded over the deep, purple sand. Seve had once been affected by a Borg vinculum, causing the personalities of those she had assimilated to rise, unbidden, to the surface. The doctor explained it was similar to having multiple personalities. Had she not known better, she would have thought the same thing had affected Kathryn. The woman, who was playing so freely, was not the same Kathryn who could reduce a person to a shivering mass of goo with nothing but a look. This Kathryn was carefree, open, expressive, and even more breathtaking. She felt a warmth wrap around her like a blanket and wondered if she was feeling love. She set her cortical node to search poetry of Earth to review at a later time. Right now, she was enjoying watching Kathryn ‘play.’

Kathryn trotted up to her and pointed to something in the distance. “I think there’s a riding stable up there, if you wanted to go for a horseback ride.” When she saw Seven’s eyes widen, she smiled and waited for the questions to come, feeling almost giddy as she studied the expressions crossing her beautiful wife’s face. _She’s accessing her cortical node now. Pulling up files pertaining to horses. Oh, wondering the purpose is and here it comes._

“What is the purpose of riding on the back of an animal?”

_Do I know my Borg or what?_ Her laughing eyes sparkled as she responded, “Because it’s fun and exhilarating, but if you’re nervous, darling, we _could_ ride double.”

Seven was beginning to recognize that look. Kathryn wanted to be close to her. “I am willing to try, Kathryn. If you want to ride double, I will accommodate you.”

The horses on Tylos 3 were quite a bit larger than those on Earth, and had some very interesting color variations, but were horses nonetheless. They had chosen a large blue one whose white mane and tail had thick strands of purple interwoven. Because Seven was the taller of the two, she got to ride in the back with Kathryn nestled against her front. A small smile graced her lips as the big horse started carrying them down the wooded trail. She was enjoying the feel of Kathryn in her arms, as well as the gentle motion of the horse as it clip clopped along. She had her arms loosely wrapped around Kathryn’s waist and Kathryn had reached a hand back, resting it casually on Seven’s knee, her arm resting possessively on top of Seven’s. She let her head fall back against Seven’s shoulder and nuzzled under Seven’s chin. Seven instinctively pulled her tighter as the smaller woman relaxed against her. Seven’s hand made lazy circles on Kathryn’s abdomen, slowly moving higher until it came to rest on Kathryn’s breast. Kathryn relaxed into the casual caress and 

nuzzled her head further under Seven’s chin. Kathryn’s contented sigh mingled with the clip clopping of the horse's hooves. Seven was finally beginning to see the appeal of being planetside. 

After Kathryn had introduced her to the da Vinci program, she had begun to see color in an entirely different way and could see the different hues in things she would have disregarded as irrelevant in the past. As she was musing over shades and hues, an unfamiliar sound emanated from her wife. She noted that her respiration had decreased and her breaths were deep and even. She had fallen asleep. Although she had no practical experience of it, she believed Kathryn was snoring. 

She used the rest of their allotted time on the horse to access and analyse the Earth poets she had called up earlier in the day. After she had researched and cross referenced, she could only conclude that she ‘had it bad.’” 

She was surprised to see the loading/unloading platform coming up. They had scheduled a two hour ride. According to her internal chronometer, they had indeed been gone two hours. She wondered if this was what humans referred to as ‘time flying.’” The holographic wrangler took the reins and guided the big horse to the platform, which was unnecessary because the horse was programmed to stop there. Aesthetics for the tourists. She was still convinced that some aesthetics were still irrelevant. Kathryn started to stir as soon as the horse stopped. She put her arms above her head and made her stretching noise as her sleepy eyes tried to focus.

“Mmm...I guess I fell asleep, huh?” She said, turning to offer Seven an apologetic smile.

“Yes. I didn’t have the heart to wake you.”

“Thank you, darling. Did you, at least, have a pleasant ride?” 

“I utilized my time in an efficient manner,” she said with a small smile.

The holographic wrangler motioned for Seven to dismount and then for Kathryn. 

Seven swung her leg over the horse’s rump and felt an odd pain in her legs and backside. Judging by how Kathryn faltered upon stepping onto the platform, she was feeling the same pain. As they started their walk back to their suite, Seven couldn’t help but notice that they were both looking rather bowlegged and sore.

“I think tonight would be perfect for a nice long soak in the hot tub.”

“Tuvok to Janeway.”

Kathryn groaned.

“Janeway here.”

“We have received the probe data.”

“Understood. Janeway out.”

“Well, darling, it looks like it’s showtime.”

“Indeed. I believe I am feeling disappointed that our time here has to come to an end.”

Kathryn wrapped her arms around Seven and exhaled a deep sigh, “I am too, darling. It’s been so nice having you all to myself for a couple of days. I have to admit, there’s a tiny part of me that isn’t quite ready to be the Captain quite yet.”

“I understand. You have had to be the Captain for fourteen long years. I enjoy seeing this side of you and I find there is more than a tiny part of me that isn’t ready to give this up.”

Kathryn nodded, and then took Seven’s hand as they headed for Astrometrics.


	5. Part 5 - Finding Home

Harry Kim had the sensor data pulled up on his console and was busy running his analysis when the couple walked in. He still didn’t want to look either of them in the eye, so he continued working.

B’Elanna Torres was at the Engineering station doing the complex calculations required for the possible energy requirements they would need if the wormhole turned out to be stable enough to traverse, and, if it led back to the alpha quadrant. She wanted to have some idea in order to form a plan on the off chance it wasn’t yet, another disappointment. Tuvok was pursuing tactical data and Chakotay was hovering, respectively over each of them. 

“Report,” she barked.

“It’s a wormhole, Captain. Harry’s going over the data now.” Chakotay stated. He was still looking rather sheepish and Janeway had to suppress a grin.

She nodded at Seven who went to her station, looking less bowlegged and sore due to her nanoprobes. Kathryn, however, was still having some difficulty. Seven allowed a slight smile before logging into her board. 

  
  


“Ensign Kim, I believe I may be able to assist you.” Seven stood beside him tapping the console in rapid sequences. “This algorithm should provide us the answers we need.”

“Thanks, Seven,” he mumbled, never taking his eyes off his console. Seven thought it was rather odd that he didn’t make eye contact and seemed skittery in her presence. It was a feeling she was quite used to, albeit not from Mr. Kim. He had been one of the first ones to try and befriend her. He had even tried to flirt with her at one time. She was relieved he didn’t take her up on her offer when she told him if he wanted to copulate, he should take off his clothes. Thinking back on that incident now, she could see the humor in it.

Janeway made her way to Harry’s console just as he looked up from his board. He couldn’t help but notice that she was walking rather stiffly and appeared to be slightly bow legged. Judging by what they all heard when Chakoty opened the com-link, he wasn’t surprised. He didn’t want to be able to picture Seven in the throes of passion. Well, he did, but he usually pictured himself in the scene and the Captain, well, she was the Captain. To think of her being capable of making Seven make those noises, he just didn’t want to know and now he couldn’t un-know it, and he couldn't un-hear it. She walked up beside him and put a hand on his shoulder, “How’s it going, Harry?”

He stiffened a bit at the touch and tried to keep his voice professional. “The data should be ready in a few moments, Captain. Preliminary scans show stability but we don’t know where it leads.” 

“Seven, help Harry,” she said.

Seven couldn’t help but notice how sore her wife still was from their ride and was feeling guilty now for not waking Kathryn. Perhaps if she had, they could have cut the ride short and then her wife might not be so uncomfortable. Seven keyed in the requisite data and waited for it to compile. Thinking the lull in activity could be a good opportunity for some ‘bridge banter,’ she looked over at Janeway and said, “In retrospect, perhaps we should have gotten a smaller one.” she said, referring to the size of the horse they had been on. “I don’t enjoy seeing you in such discomfort.”

Harry’s eyes grew to the size of saucers and his face drained of all color. He kept his eyes on his console and started his mantra.  _ I didn’t hear anything, I didn’t see anything…  _

“Well, it’s been years since I’ve done that, Seven, and never on one that size.” 

_ I didn’t hear anything, I didn’t see anything. _

“I’m just not used to it. I guess two hours  _ was _ a bit much.” 

_ I didn’t hear anything! I didn’t see anything! _

“Next time maybe we’ll just do it for an hour. It was pretty though wasn’t it?”

_ I didn’t hear anything!! I didn’t see anything!!  _ He began to sway unsteadily.

“It was aesthetically pleasing,” she said, as she entered more data. “Now that I’ve done it once, perhaps next time we could each have our own, rather than riding double.”

Harry’s vision narrowed to black, just before he hit the deck.

Janeway whirled around and looked down at the young Ensign. “Janeway to the Doctor, medical emergency in Astrometrics.”

“On my way. Doctor out.”

B’Elanna saw the commotion and went over to see if she could help, but, if the truth be known, it was mostly to gawk. Harry had been acting weird ever since the com-link incident. She knew Harry had a huge crush on the Borg… hell, everyone knew... so she guessed hearing her moaning like a banshee couldn’t have been easy for him.

“What happened, Captain?” B’Elanna asked.

“I’m not sure, he… just… hit the deck. Seven, check the data and see if they’re any clues there.”   
  
“Yes, Captain.”

“The data is still compiling, Captain,” she said, shaking her head.

The Doctor arrived in a timely manner and ran his scans. “He appears to have fainted, Captain. All of his vitals are normal and there’s no sign of injury or trauma, no illness. Just a run of the mill fainting case. He took a thin tube out of the medical kit he carried with him, snapped it, and then waved it under Harry’s nose. Harry’s eyes fluttered open, although he was still deathly pale.

“Mr. Kim, can you tell me what happened?” The doctor asked.

Apparently he couldn’t. His mouth kept moving but nothing was coming out. He was wide eyed but didn’t look like he could see anything. 

The Doctor waved his hand in front of his face and got nothing.

“Captain, did you see what happened?”

“No,” she said, turning to the Doctor. “Seven and I were talking about horseback riding and down he went.” 

Harry blushed a deep crimson, upon hearing the Captain, and mumbled to himself, “Horseback riding?”

“Captain, preliminary information has been compiled.” Seven stated.

“Report, Seven.”

Seven’s fingers flew rapidly over the keypad as the viewscreen filled with images showing a densely packed cloud composed of an infinite number of icy bodies. Her fingers tapped another command and brought up a different image.

There was a collective sucking of breath in the Astrometrics lab. Harry, who had managed to get onto his feet, grabbed onto the corner of his console to keep himself from passing out again.

“Kahless on a fucking targ turd, Seven,” B’Elanna said breathlessly, completely forgetting there was anyone else in the room,“is that the Oort Cloud?” she asked, as she began to sway slightly.

Given the weight of the new information, Janeway decided to let B'Elanna’s utterance slide. If there was ever a time to invoke that particular image, it was now. 

Seven looked up from her console and offered her a subtle smile. “Yes, B’Elanna Torres, it is, indeed, the Oort Cloud,” she said as her eyes swept the faces of those present. 

Tuvok studied the viewscreen with an upraised eyebrow and Seven detected a significant increase in his vital signs, the human equivalent of ‘jumping for joy.’” Harry, she noted, was still noticeably pale from his previous loss of consciousness, and was now holding onto his console for support, the white of his knuckles standing out in stark contrast to the black material it was constructed from. Chakotay was also noticeably pale. Then, she looked at Kathryn. 

Her eyes were shining a brilliant blue as if it were the first time she was seeing the data. Due to the way she had originally responded when first learning the information, she was pleased that Kathyn had had some time to prepare herself. 

“Janeway to Paris.”

“Paris here, Captain.”

“You’re needed in Astrometrics.”

“On my way, Captain, Paris out.”

Even though Kathryn had already seen the data, she was no less amazed by it, and had to swallow back the lump threatening to form in her throat. She quietly asked, “Do you detect any neutrino emissions? Thoron radiation? Anything out of the ordinary?”

“No, Captain.”

“Is it stable?”

Seven brought up the familiar data. “No. While the aperture in this region of space appears to be fixed, at the moment, readings suggest the exit aperture fluctuates between all four quadrants. It is currently in the outer region of the Oort Cloud.” Seven's fingers keyed in a set of commands, sending the data to the large viewscreen.

Seven stepped up to the screen and pointed to a set of numbers. “These readings indicate the aperture remains fixed for approximately 28 days before its next fluctuation.” 

“And how long has it been at that location?” Janeway asked.

Seven keyed in a new set of data. “The rate of verteron decay indicates the exit aperture has been at this location for 14 days. It will remain open for another 14.”

Kathryn walked up and stood beside her. “Is it stable enough for travel?”

“Yes, Captain,” 

“And how long would it take for us to go through it?”

“It would take approximately 3 days at low impulse to reach the Alpha Quadrant.” 

The computer chirped and then announced, “Tom Paris Requesting Entrance.”

“Computer, allow entry.” 

Tom walked in and immediately looked at the image on the screen. “Cool looking ice cloud. Is that what’s up ahead?” he asked, nodding greetings to everyone in the room. “These things make the badlands look like a walk in the park,” he said walking up to the viewscreen, “and it’s not only because they’re packed so close together,” he said pointing to the densely packed bodies, “these things are constantly shifting, causing gravimetric sheers and eddies in the surrounding space, not to mention how sharp they can be.” He shook his head as he continued to study the screen. “I knew some people, all excellent pilots, who formed a secret top gun club once,” he paused, screwing his lips together and tapping his forefinger on them, then looked at Janeway, shrugging, “nah, I can’t remember the name of it. Anyway, they wanted to see who could make it through the Oort Cloud back home. They gave it up after the first three of them ended up as space dust. There’s just no safe way to navigate one of those things at sublight.” He turned his attention back to the viewscreen to study it in more detail. “Matter of fact, if I didn’t know better, I would think this  _ was _ the Oort Cloud.”

Seven recognized, very well, the grin that worked its way slowly across Janeway's lips, and the sparkle in her eyes. She was going to tease him.

Janeway lifted her eyebrows up and asked the blond pilot, “So, let's say there was something, I don’t know, a geodesic fold for instance, inside one of those, or perhaps a wormhole. Would it be possible to enter and exit from it?”

Tom knit his brows together, having no clue where the line of questioning was leading, but proceeded to answer it anyway. “Well, I mean, a geodesic fold would be impossible because one, it takes two red giants to produce one and two, the geodesic radiation liquifies organic matter. I mean, a ship would survive the trip, but I wouldn’t want the job of cleaning it up afterward,” he made a mock expression of disgust, then continued, “and a wormhole,” he shook his head, “there’d be no way to enter it. Ya can’t navigate an ice cloud at sublight and ya can’t enter a wormhole at warp.” He shrugged subconsciously.

“The ultimate catch-22,” Janeway interjected.

“Now exiting,” he continued, “could be another story, but it would take an exemplary pilot to pull it off.” He turned from the Captain and studied the viewscreen again. “Let’s say the exit was here,” he pointed to a more sparsely packed spot on the viewscreen, “you’d have to go to warp at the  _ exact _ moment, and I mean exact moment, you exited. If you were off by even a millionth of a second, you’d be sliced all to hell in a matter of minutes, maybe even seconds.” He turned back to Janeway expectantly.

Janeway placed her hands on her hips, lowered her head, and began to pace a short path between Tom and Seven. She nodded her head every so often as she carefully considered the information she had just been given.  _ Well fuck me. I’m damned if I do and damned if I don’t. I don’t know why in the fuck the end of the damn thing has to be in the Oort Cloud anyway. Fuck! Fuck! Fuck! So, we can risk going through the fuckin thing, and IF we make it, risk getting torn to shreds by fucking ice cubes! Ha!  _

When she gave an amused snort, B’Elanna looked at Seven, who merely lifted her ocular implant, indicating that she had no idea what was so funny.

_ Well, it’s either that or be stuck in this god forsaken hell hole. God only knows when an opportunity like this may come along again. The goddamned Species 8472, the fuckin Hirogen and every other goddamned species I’ve ever had to defend this ship against. They can all kiss my lily white ass. Jesus H. mother fuckin Christ, what a choice. Stay here for another god only knows how long or face getting everyone killed trying to get home. I know what I’d do if it was only me but it’s not. This is what I signed up for the minute I switched to the command track at the academy and fuck me runnin’...this one’s a doozey.  _

She stopped in front of Tom and looked at him. “So, what you’re saying is that it’s not impossible.”

“Well no, not  _ impossible _ , just not very likely to succeed. Captain?” He was hoping she would give some explanation for all of this, but she looked at Seven instead.

“Seven, give me an accurate margin of error,” Kathryn said, hoping Tom was exaggerating.

Seven assumed her thinking pose. “Mr. Paris is correct. There is a .011 percent margin of error.” 

“What’s this all about, Captain?” Tom asked, curiosity and frustration apparent on his face.

Janeway nodded at Seven, sending her back to her board, trusting that she would be able to discern where the next question was headed. 

“Tom, what’s the singular defining feature within the Oort Cloud?”

She smiled inwardly when she heard Seven’s fingers tapping on the board.

Now he was really confused. It had been several years since he had last studied the Cloud at the academy. “Well, it’s been a while, but I think it’s the big chunk they call Satan’s Gateway.”

“Seven?” Her fingers flew over the board until she found what she was looking for, then sent the data to the viewscreen.

“Turn around, Tom. Tell me what you see.” Janeway’s voice was gentle.

He took in the shape of the space ice, the sheer size of it, and his eyes were drawn to the gaping chasm in the center, looking like it went on forever. “It’s an image of Satan's Gateway.”

“Seven, reduce magnification.”

Tom watched as the image reduced in size, looking exactly as it had when he first stepped into Astrometrics.

He looked at Janeway and saw the glimmer of unshed tears shining in her eyes. “Captain?” He was afraid to even hope.

Stepping up to him, Janeway reached out and squeezed his forearm. “Are you an exemplary pilot, Mister Paris? Because, according to you, we’re gonna need one. That  _ is _ the Oort Cloud.”

He felt a wave of dizziness hit him and he started stumbling sideways. He probably would have hit the deck if the Doctor hadn’t stepped up to steady him. “Easy there, Mister Paris. I certainly hope you can fly better than you can walk.” The doctor quipped.

Harry, B’Elanna, Chakotay, Janeway, Seven and even Tuvok, gathered around Tom and waited for him to catch his breath.    
  
“We’re going home?” he asked the Captain.

She nodded her head and said, “Yes, we’re going home.

“You're sure?”

“There is a 98.9 percent chance of success if you can get us through, Lieutenant Paris.” Seven answered from behind him.

“We’ve been here before, people. Let's keep our wits about us and for the time being, this stays in this room. No exceptions and that’s an order.” She put her hand on Seven’s back, mainly because she needed some comfort but also to get her attention. “I want you to run an analysis and give me a timeline.”   
  
Seven went to her console and brought up the data, giving Janeway a nod when it was completed. 

“How long’s it going to take us to get there?”

“At our current speed it will take twelve days. If we travel at maximum warp, it will take nine.”

“Tom,” she said, “Do it.”

“Yes, ma’am.” His face split into a wide grin as he headed for the door. 

“And Mister Paris,” she paused until he looked back at her, “wipe that grin off of your face.” She said, smiling.

“Harry?” 

He looked up at the Captain, for the first time since the com-link and horseback riding incident, still running the mantra through his head. 

When she had his attention, she said, “I want you working with Seven on this. We need to know if there are going to be any surprises and what possible issues we may encounter. We need to be prepared for anything and everything we can possibly think of.”

“B’Elanna, get down to engineering and start going through the engines with a fine tooth comb. The last thing we’ll need is to lose power halfway through the wormhole. There's no telling what might happen if that thing closes with us still in it.

Doctor, I want you to get sickbay setup for mass casualty protocol and get crewman Scholtus to help you; she’s got some medical training. Tell her I’ll be running mass casualty drills or something.

“Tuvok, you just keep doing what you do.”

“That’s it people, let’s get at it.”

  
  
  
  


It had been two days since she had seen her wife for any length of time. They had been working ‘round the clock, and even at that, she wasn’t sure if she would have everything ready by the time they reached the wormhole. She had fourteen years of logs to compile into a brief for the Starfleet brass along with personnel reports, trade agreements, applications for admission into the Federation and more she didn’t want to think about. It all made her head hurt. 

She got herself a whiskey and settled in on the sofa. Closing her eyes, she held the glass up to her forehead, hoping it would ease the ache. Soon after, she heard the door swish open and couldn’t help but smile at the tall drink of Borg that walked in. Ever since their honeymoon, Seven had been wearing what she called ‘civilian attire,’ and Kathryn couldn’t say she objected. She didn’t really care for the crew ogling her wife. It was decided she could wear black pants and either a gold blouse or jacket, because Astrometrics technically fell under the purview of engineering, or blue denoting the science department. Kathryn was very happy she had chosen blue. She liked the way it brought out her eyes, though Seven really wanted to wear red because that was her favorite color. She stated her case, argued the finer points, but in the end, lost.

She strode across the room and kissed Kathryn hello, and then went to change into her new favorite outfit; a pair of boxer shorts and a T-shirt. “Have you eaten yet, Kathryn?”

If she hadn’t been so tired, she would have given Seven a lascivious look but as it was, she just answered, “no,” and put the glass back up to her forehead. 

Concerned, Seven confirmed that her vital signs were normal. She sat down and pulled Kathryn’s feet into her lap and started to massage her feet. “Would you like me to get you an analgesic for the headache?”

“If it doesn’t go away in a little while, I’ll take something for it. That feels wonderful.” She leaned back and closed her eyes, concentrating on the strong hands gently squeezing and kneading her foot.

Seven knew by the sound of her breathing that Kathryn had fallen asleep. She considered finding a more comfortable position and trying to sleep but in the end, she carefully stood, scooped Kathryn up in her arms, carried her to the bed and laid her down. She placed her clothing in the recycler and crawled in beside her wife. Kathryn had rolled onto her side and Seven snuggled up behind her, wrapped her arm around her and closed her eyes.

  
  
  
  


Kathryn rolled over and opened her eyes. Her internal clock told her she had two hours before the start of Alpha shift. Seven was sleeping peacefully beside her, sprawled on her back, arms and legs akimbo. Kathryn pulled the covers down, agog at the site before her, as she lightly dragged the back of her hand over Seven’s stomach, fascinated that her abdominal bands were both incredibly strong, yet flexible enough to allow for movement. She smiled broadly when she remembered Seven saying it would be inefficient if drones couldn’t breathe when she had asked her about them on their honeymoon. Her eyes wandered down to the sparse thatch of hair and the juncture of her legs and her hand followed. Her fingers traced little patterns over the coarse strands and then wandered to a breast. She idly played with Seven’s nipple, noting in passing how it hardened under her touch. She looked at her sleeping wife and nuzzled her head in the crook of Seven’s neck, feeling a tear slide over the bridge of her nose.When coming up with a background story for their covert operation, Seven wasn’t too far off when she stated that was when they ‘fell in love.’ Even then, Kathryn had felt her heart stir. Seven hadn’t let her get away with anything, even when she had snapped at her. Looking back on it now, she recalled that she  _ had _ wanted to ask her out on a date but the demands of the Captain had overridden the desires of the woman. That spark of attraction, the desire to know the heart of Seven, even to hold her hand, all got buried underneath the needs of her ship. But now, she was freed from the constricting mask of command and free to find the balance between Kathryn and Captain. She felt the chains on her heart shatter as feelings of joy, tenderness and love poured out of her. She bent her head, taking Seven’s nipple gently in her mouth and let her tongue play lightly over it while her other hand gently squeezed Seven’s other breast. 

She could feel Seven’s breathing starting to increase and started licking a little harder as her fingers started a slow dance over her other nipple. Seven arched her back into the touches as she was stirred so sweetly from her sleep, and gently ran her fingers through Kathryn’s hair. Kathryn looked up at her with tears streaming down her face and kissed her so gently, it was almost a whisper, trying desperately to convey her feelings into something tangible. Seven breathed in the kiss, as if it were the only thing giving her life, as she slid her hands from Kathryn’s hair to the sides of her face, touching her so tenderly that it made Kathryn gasp. Kathryn traced Seven’s lips with her tongue, memorizing the taste and texture, and Seven opened her mouth slightly, allowing Kathryn free reign. She gently cupped Seven’s cheek, as she traced her bottom lip with her thumb while her tongue traced the cupid’s bow shape of her upper lip. Seven moaned quietly, thoroughly enjoying the tenderness. Kathryn slipped the tip of her thumb into Seven’s mouth and Seven traced it gently with her tongue. “Annika…” she whispered against her lips, “I want to pour myself all over you…” Her tongue was still a whisper on Seven’s lips.

Seven moaned quietly and tried to process this new side of Kathryn. She was so open, so tender. Her heart caught in her throat when she realized what Kathryn was saying to her, and she opened her eyes and collided with the most beautiful eyes she had ever seen, shining from the tears which flowed freely. “Annika… I…”

The rest of the words were cut off by a passionate, yet gentle kiss. “Tell me, Kathryn,” Seven said quietly.

“I am hopelessly…” She kissed her tenderly, “madly….” she kissed her again, “passionately…” she kissed her deeply, “and completely in love with you,” she kissed her with every ounce of the emotion she was feeling and then looked at her wife. She wasn’t prepared for the look in Seven’s eyes, it simply took her breath away. 

“Kathryn,” Seven whispered, “I’ve cross referenced how I feel when I’m with you and have come to the conclusion that I’ve got it bad for you.”

The next hour was filled with whispered endearments, tender touches, and gentle embraces filled with all of the love and tenderness they could express. 

  
  
  


Her senior staff was abuzz when she and Seven walked in and took their respective places at the conference table. The wormhole could be seen off of the port bow and the entire ship was vibrating with excitement. “All right, people, let’s settle down.” Captain Janeway said through a smile.

“Harry, report.”

Harry, although still bothered by looking at the Captain, had finally managed to rise above his discomfort and look her in the eyes. “The wormhole is stable, Captain, but the Cloud is causing heavy interference with the communication systems. Until we get to the other side, I’m afraid we’ll have no contact with Starfleet. I’ve tried every trick in the book, Captain.”

“Understood, Mr. Kim. Seven, see if you can offer some assistance. I would strongly prefer to be able to tell the ‘fleet we’re coming.”

“B’Elanna?”

“Warp engines are purring like a kitten, Captain. We’ve been through every plasma relay, every gel pack, conduit, you name it. Taking the replicators offline will boost the impulse engines by 15% and will be powered down at your command.”

Janeway nodded, “Very good.”

“Tuvok?” 

“All systems are functioning within normal parameters, Captain.”

“Doctor, are we prepared for a mass casualty scenario?”

“Of course, let’s hope we don’t need it.”

“Amen to that, Doctor. Seven?”

“I have plotted the most efficient course through the wormhole. It will add a minimal amount of time, but will lessen the risk to Voyager and her crew. I have gone over the data with Mr. Paris and have sent it to his console.”

“Chakotay? Any last minute reports I need to be aware of?”

“No, ma’am, all departments have submitted their briefs, and the logs have all been updated to reflect our current crew complement.”

“And the matter I spoke to you about this morning has been taken care of?”   
  
Chakotay showed off his dimples, “I took care of that right after we spoke.”

Janeway’s lips lifted into a conspiratorial smile and then she turned to Tom. “And you, Mr. Paris, are you ready for this?”

He nodded his head slowly, “Yes, Captain. The course is laid in. Seven and I have determined when I need to jump ‘er to warp. With a little luck, we’ll get across the Cloud in one piece.”   
  
“I’m counting on it, Tom. I have every confidence you’ll get us through this. Are there any questions?” Janeway made a trip around the table with her eyes and dismissed the lot of them.

Stepping onto the bridge, she had one more piece of business to attend to. “Ensign Kim.” 

The ensign immediately snapped to attention upon hearing the sharp whip of command in her voice.

“Did you forget something this morning, Ensign?”

Harry hesitated briefly and then answered, “No, Ma’am.”

“Then, why aren’t you in uniform, Mr. Kim?”

A flash of confusion crossed his face. “This Ensign is currently garbed in the proper uniform befitting his rank, Ma’am.”

Janeway fished into her pocket, pulled out a pip and then placed it on his collar. “Now you are wearing the proper uniform,” she said with a grin, “Congratulations, Lieutenant. Your new rank was entered into the system this morning.”

Harry straightened up even more when the Captain put on his new pip and the bridge erupted in applause and congratulations as Janeway took her seat.

“Janeway to Torres.”

“Torres here.”

“Take the replicators offline.”

“Replicators offline, Captain.”

“Janeway out.” She was very grateful her wife had stocked away a few thermoses of her favorite brew.

“Take us in, Tom. Nice and easy.”

“Shields to maximum,” Janeway stated calmly, as they traversed their way through the wormhole. It was a bumpy ride and was going to get worse before it got better. Harry and Tuvok both had death grips on the padding surrounding their boards. Janeway still wondered why on earth some stations required their officers to stand. It was ridiculous, she was barely hanging on as it was and she was sitting down.

It was going to be a very long three days. Janeway set up a six hour on, six hour off, duty rotation for those who could leave their stations. However, the bridge crew was determined to see it through to the end. It turned out that Seven wasn’t the only one who thought to squirrel away the finest organic suspension ever devised.

By the third day, everyone was feeling the strain. Tempers were short, orders were barked more harshly than necessary, and responses were clipped. Janeway knew they would get a second wind as soon as they cleared the wormhole...if they survived.

“B’Elanna, can we get any more power for the inertial dampeners?” She yelled.

“Sorry Captain, I’m giving everything I’ve got to the shields!” she shouted back over the strain of the impulse engines.

“Tom, time to exit aperture?” 

A conduit exploded above Janeway, littering her with debris.

“13 minutes, 20 seconds.”

“Shields down to 45 percent.” Tuvok yelled above the noise of Voyagers straining impulse engines and various explosions.

“B’Elanna, I need more power to the shields! Shut down life support if you have to!”

“Yes, Captain!”

They would have at least an hour of breathable air if nothing else caught on fire.

“Shields are up to 53 percent!”

“10 minutes 16 seconds”

“Minor hull breach on deck 7, erecting level 10 force field.

“Captain, the impulse engines are overloading!”

“Keep her operational Lieutenant.”

“7 minutes 42 seconds.”

“Captain, I can’t keep her aligned!”

“Seven, get down there and help B’Elanna keep that manifold contained!” It took everything she had to follow this order, but after sharing a knowing look with her wife, Seven gave her a quick nod of acknowledgement, and headed for the turbolift.

“Shields down to 29 percent.”

“Tom! Get us the HELL OUT OF HERE!

He knew the risks...push the impulse engines to maximum, or keep it steady and the entire ship breaks apart. He silently apologized to his wife as he pushed the controls to maximum. 

“Report!”

“Time to aperture, 30 seconds.”   
  
“Get ready to punch it, Tom.”

“10 seconds!” He keyed in a course correction and got ready to take them to warp.

“9, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1!”

_ Voyager _ shuddered as her impulse drive disengaged in order to power up the warp engines. Everyone on the bridge was white knuckled, as Voyager jumped to warp, and smoothed out.

“Report, Tom.”

“We’re currently on the other side of the Oort Cloud, Captain. We made it!”

The bridge was deathly silent. “All stop.”

“All stop, aye.”

The disembodied voice of B'Elanna came through the Captain’s com-link. “Captain, the EPS manifold is about to blow!” 

The explosion rocked the ship to her port side where she remained listed until Tom brought the auxiliary thrusters online and righted her.

“Janeway to Torres.”

Nothing.

“Janeway to Seven.”

Nothing.

“Janeway to Engineering!”

A small crackle came over her combadge. “..rr.. ..r. C..t.i.”

“Harry, clean it up!”

“Respond!”

“Tor.es h.re C.pt..n”

“Tuvok, get repair crews down there.”

Janeway was as white as a sheet as she paced what was left of her bridge.  _ Seven! Jesus H. Christ! Answer me! _ “Janeway to Seven, respond!”

Nothing.

“Someone tell me what’s going on on my ship!”

“My board is dead, Captain.” Kim responded.

“Then, get your ass down to engineering and help!”

Tuvok was already on his way with the security team and Tom was trying to keep the ship from listing again.

“….n to C..pt..n .a…ay”

“Seven?”

“C……c..i.n.s .r. n.. …cti..al”

“Say again Seven!”

Nothing.

  
  


“Federation Starship  _ Voyager _ , this is the  _ USS Enterprise _ . Do you require assistance?”

“Yes. Our inner ship communications are down and we’ve had an EPS manifold blow.”

“Understood. Picard out.”

Repair teams materialized on the bridge and began to repair the comm systems while another team materialized near main engineering and began to clean away the debris from the explosion.

They were noticeably upset to see what appeared to be a mostly Borg female carrying away large parts of the engineering section single handedly. That alone was an amazing feat, but the fact that she was doing it with a ten inch piece of metal sticking out of her lower shoulder was even more so. She looked wild eyed as she chucked hunks of metal here and there in her attempt to open up a hole big enough for rescue teams to get through to the wounded in Engineering.

Commander Riker ordered the woman to sickbay citing he and his crew would get to the wounded. 

She gave him an icy glare and stated coldly, “I will not comply,” before clearing away more debris. 

When Picard materialized on the bridge, Janeway didn’t know whether to kiss him or punch him. Instead she leveled him with a force 7 glare and snipped, “Permission to come aboard granted...Captain.” She would take him to task later for his breach of protocol.

He ignored the jibe. “Engineering team, report.”

“We have a hell of a mess down here Captain, we’re trying to open up a hole to get to main engineering now.”

“Ensign Peel, how is that board coming?” Picard asked.

“Not well, Captain. Every circuit is blown. She’ll need a full refit before she’ll be operational again.”

“Make it so.”

“Yes, sir.”

“Belay that order, Ensign. My crew will repair the board.”

The ensign looked to Captain Picard for verification and got only a very angry glare from Janeway. “Do you have a hearing problem, Ensign?”   
  
“Yes, sir, I mean, no, sir!”

“Tom, report.”

“Impulse thrusters are holding, Captain. I’m keeping her steady for the repair and rescue crews.” She heard the break in his voice and knew exactly what he was going through.

“Crusher to Picard.”

“Go ahead, Doctor.”

“The EMH and I are treating the wounded now; so far there have been no casualties.”

“Thank you, Doctor. Picard out.”

“Captain, if you would loan me the use of your crew and communications array, I think I can take it from here.”

Picard saw the steely look of determination in her eyes and nodded. “I’ll make it so. O’Brien, beam me back.”

Captain Janeway was again in sole command of her ship. 

“Doctor, report!” She was startled when the voice of Beverly Crusher came over the comm link.

“The wounded…”

“Dr. Crusher, on this vessel, I take my reports from  _ my _ Doctor. Understood?” Janeway’s voice left to room for argument.

“Yes, sir.”

She could almost hear the EMH puffing up as he answered the hail over Crusher's combadge.

“We are treating minor injuries, broken bones and plasma burns. Nothing life threatening so far. One former Borg drone has had a 10 inch piece of metal removed from her shoulder and is on her way to the bridge as we speak.”

“Thank you Doctor. Janeway out.”

Several seconds later, Seven walked out of the turbo lift, wanting to take Janeway in her arms and never let go. She stopped short when she saw the look on Kathryn’s face. “Rescue crews from the Enterprise have gotten through, Captain. It looked much worse than it was. All members of the engineering team are functional.”

Janeway swore she heard a muffled sob of relief from the helm as she closed her eyes for a moment and silently sent up a prayer to whatever Gods or Goddesses there were.

“Thank you, Seven. I need your expertise getting our communications back online. Captain Picard has graciously loaned me the use of his array for the time being but I want to get ours up as soon as possible.”

“Yes, Captain.”

She shouldered the  _ Enterprise _ Ensign out of the way and directly accessed the comm system through the main relay on the wall panel. She used her optical enhancement to locate good circuits and in moments had communications restored.

“Try now, Captain.”

“Captain to the Doctor, report.”

“The engineering teams are coming in now.”

“Janeway out.”

“Thank you, Seven.”

Kathryn ordered the Enterprise crews back to their own ship and her crews worked around the clock to complete the repairs. 

“Janeway to Picard.”

“Picard here.”

“I don’t suppose you have a spare EPS manifold lying around do you, Jean Luc?” Kathryn’s tone was as sweet as honey.

She heard Jean Luc chuckle. “We just happen to have one for a wayward Captain and her crew.”

Between Seven and Harry, the communications board was refitted in record time and all systems, while still looking the worse for wear, were up and running.

“Harry, open a ship wide channel.”

“Ship wide open, Captain.”

She took a deep breath. “It has been my pleasure to serve with each and every one of you. A Captain couldn’t ask for a finer crew and I want you all to know that I would serve with any of you again in a heartbeat.  _ Voyager _ has been a family for fourteen long years and we’re finally home. Thank you all.”

Harry left the channel open one second longer than normal so the Captain could hear the cheers of her crew.

  
  


She hadn’t slept in 3 days and now they were finally back in the Alpha Quadrant, home. She turned over the con to the Commander and headed to her quarters taking Seven of Nine with her. Once they were securely inside, Kathryn fell against her wife and cried. Seven scooped her up in her arms and carried her to the bed, gently laying her down and crawling in beside her, pulling her close. 

Seven murmured softly, “You are not alone anymore, Kathryn. I am here.”

Kathryn wrapped herself tighter around her wife and cried herself to sleep.

  
  
  


She woke up with a pounding headache and was almost mortified to see that she had slept on top of Seven all night. Seven just smiled at her, and Kathryn felt her heart melt a little more.

“Good morning. I’m sorry I slept on you all night. You should have moved me.”

“It’s all right. I did not want to wake you. You needed your sleep; it’s been an unpleasant few days.

Kathryn extricated herself from Seven and sat up, pinching the bridge of her nose as the pounding in her head increased. “Seven, call the Doctor. I have a pounding headache.”

Seven was surprised that Kathryn actually wanted to see the doctor. Normally, she would have gritted her teeth and gone on. When the doctor materialized Seven called him to their bedroom. He was about to say something smart assed, and then saw Janeway lying on the bed, in obvious pain. None of the scans detected a cause for it.

“Your vitals are strong, Captain. You’ve been under an incredible amount of strain these past few days; it’s probably just caught up to you.” He pressed a hypospray against her neck and she instantly felt relief. 

  
“Thanks, Doctor. You may want to consider picking a name soon; we’ll be home tomorrow.”

He looked at her sardonically and quipped that he would take it under advisement.

Once she had taken a hot shower, Kathryn felt human again. Seven had a light breakfast prepared for her and then took her turn in the shower.

“I need to call my mother. She’ll be waiting. We’re still a day away from Earth, but she’ll be beside herself.”

“Kathryn, why are you procrastinating?”

“I don’t exactly know how to tell her that we’re married.”

Seven felt a jolt of fear go through her. “Is it because I’m Borg?”

Kathryn heard the quaver in her voice and closed the gap between them. “No, darling. It’s because I’ve never even dated a woman before. This might come as a little bit of a shock to her.”

“Your mother loves you. If she doesn’t object to me being Borg, I doubt she will object to me being female.” Kathryn kissed the lanky blonde and felt the stirrings of arousal the longer she stayed in her strong arms. 

Freeing herself, she sat down at the comm station and within a few seconds, was looking at her mother. “Hi, Mom.” Kathryn held back a sob. Only through years of rigorous training and discipline was she able to slam her command mask back into place. 

“Kathryn,” her mother whispered, small sobs wracking her shoulders, “I heard about your return and have been up all night waiting for you to call,” Gretchen Janeway said, wiping the tears from her eyes and beaming at her eldest daughter. Kathryn noticed the new worry lines around her eyes and her hair was more silver than red but she was still as stunning as always.

“Yes, we had a few problems coming through the wormhole but we are all here safe and sound now.”

Gretchen Janeway pressed her hand up to the view screen and Kathryn did the same. “Mom, I have some great news for you.” Kathryn's face lit up with a smile.

“Aside from the fact that you’re home?”

Kathryn looked at Seven, silently motioning her to come over. Seven rested her hand possessively on Kathryn's shoulder as bent over her shoulder until she was visible on the video screen.

“Mom, I would like you to meet Seven of Nine, my wife.”

It was a good thing Gretchen was sitting down. Her mouth fell open and her eyes got as big as saucers. She did a fine impression of a P’fluzian Watahfuk, opening and closing her mouth as if she was gasping for breath. Then, it happened. Gretchen clasped her hands together as a grin split her face wide open. Her eyes sparkled like the Pacific at midnight, just like Kathryn’s did when she was at her happiest.

“Kathryn, I never thought I'd see the day! Congratulations to you and Seven of Nine,” she said, making eye contact with Seven, “Welcome to the family! I look forward to hearing all about this when you get home. You  _ are _ coming to Indiana, aren’t you?” 

Kathryn looked at Seven, silently asking if it was okay. Seven nodded. 

“Of course we are, Mom. I can hardly wait to see you.”

“Me too, dear. Now go play with your starship while I get things ready here. Janeway out.”


	6. Part 6 - Finding Home

“Chakotay to Captain.”

“Janeway here.”

“We’re being hailed. You may want to come up here.”

“On my way, Janeway out.”

She and Seven strode onto the bridge, and faced the viewscreen. 

“On screen.”

The face of Admiral Alynna Nechayev filled the screen and she didn’t look very happy. “Captain Janeway, welcome home.”

The Captain stretched her spine up and squared her shoulders. “Thank you, sir.”

“I understand you have a Borg on your vessel.” Nechayev’s eyes were cold.

“Former Borg, sir. Seven of Nine, my wife.” She injected as much of a warning into her voice as she dared to.

Admiral Nechayev’s eyes went wide for a split second and resumed their steely gaze. “I look forward to reading your brief. Your orders are to report directly to Earth, where you will surrender your command and stand down _Voyager_. I’ve transmitted the coordinates to you.”

“Understood, sir.”

“Nechayev out.”

Once the view screen went black, Janeway relaxed her posture. She nodded at the relief helmsman,” Enter the coordinates, Ensign Reynolds. You have the bridge, Commander.”

She retired to her ready room and pulled up her orders feeling quite surprised they were scheduled to land at Starfleet headquarters rather than docking at McKinley station, as was normal protocol. She knew Admiral Alynna Nechayev lost her husband at Wolf 359 and was not too happy about her bringing a Borg home with her. She must have been absolutely livid to hear it was Janeway’s spouse.

Janeway shifted through paperwork until she could barely see straight but all ships logs were ready to be handed over. All briefs were filed with Starfleet. Glancing out her ready room viewport, an alarming number of Starfleet vessels had joined them in an impromptu procession. Those in the lead position had formed a tight inverted “V” at the bow of her little ship as the cadre formed into an honor guard.

“Chakotay to Captain.”

“We’re receiving another hail.”

“On my way.”

She was already tired of the attention. She shuddered to think what it was going to be like when they reached Earth.

“Onscreen, Lieutenant Kim.”

She snapped to attention and put her command mask firmly in place when she saw Admiral Paris.

He wasn’t nearly as composed. “Kathryn, welcome home.”

“Thank you, Admiral. It’s good to see some familiar faces, sir.”

“I’ll bet it is. How’s my boy?” He asked, cutting right to the chase.

Kathryn allowed a small smile. “He’s doing very well, Admiral. After three days at the helm, he’s getting some much deserved rack time. If it wasn’t for his exemplary piloting skills, _Voyager_ wouldn’t have made it.”

Tears of pride shone in his eyes. “You’ve gotten your orders?”

“Yes, sir,” she said, trying not to choke on the words.

“Tell Tom I’ll be looking forward to seeing him after the Change of Command.”

“Yes, sir.”

“Paris out.”

“Chakotay, send this memo to all hands, priority one,” she said, handing him a PADD.

“I’ll be in my ready room, poking forks into my eyes,” she said dryly.

Chakotay laughed, knowing how much she hated paperwork. “Better you than me, Captain.” 

She tossed a mock force ten glare over her shoulder and then disappeared into her ready room. She checked and re-checked to confirm she hadn’t missed anything. Starfleet procedures and protocol had been drilled into her head all of her life. She picked up a few of her more personal items, wrapped them, and put them in a container. Starfleet would box up the rest and have it delivered to her. She took one last look out of the viewport, not surprised to see more ships had joined in to escort her brave ship and her crew home.

Seven was, surprisingly, lounging on the sofa when she arrived home. There were two empty containers along with one that was already sealed. She shrugged out of her uniform jacket and kissed her wife. “What’s in the container?”

“I have collected various items over the years that I want to keep.” 

Kathryn nodded, too tired to inquire further at the moment.

“You look tired. Have you eaten anything today?” Seven asked, as she went to the replicator. Before Kathryn had even answered, Seven had a grilled cheese and tomato soup ready for her. “Sit and eat.”

Kathryn raised an eyebrow at her. “That sounded a lot like an order, Seven.”

“Wife outranks Captain. Now eat.”

Kathryn rolled her eyes playfully and did as she was told. She was going to have to get used to taking orders again. She had felt her ass twitch when Nechayev had given her orders but that’s how it was going to be now. No more autonomy.

“Something is bothering you; I can tell by the look on your face. Tell me,” she said quietly.

“This all just feels so surreal. I haven’t been subjected to taking orders for fourteen years and, although it’s ingrained in me, it really chapped my ass today when Nechayev ordered me to stand down _Voyager_ and surrender my command upon arrival to Earth.”

Seven’s face went a bit pale. “They are making you give up _Voyager_?”

Kathryn would have laughed at the dumbfounded expression if it had been anyone else on board. “I don’t suppose you’ve had an occasion to research the military Change of Command protocol. Yes, I will surrender my command, stand down the ship, and submit myself to the powers that be for them to do with me what they will. I am going to have a lot to answer for once they drill down into the actual log files. I bent the Prime Directive on a number of occasions and I probably even broke it once or twice, and I married a Borg. Nechayev wasn’t too happy with me about that. Her husband was killed at Wolf 359.”

Seven’s expression grew very dark. “I was at Wolf 359.” She felt a tear form in her eye. 

Kathryn took her hand, “Seven?”

“I had no practical understanding of this before, but now that I am married, I can understand what it must be like to lose a spouse. I am very sorry for her loss. I couldn’t imagine losing you, Kathryn, and since it was the Borg that killed him, I would be a painful reminder to her of all she lost. If he was assimilated, he is very likely on a cube right now,” she said, raising her eyes to Kathryn. “If you were to be killed by some enemy, I would kill them all.” Seven’s eyes became cold. 

Kathryn shivered at the expression in Seven’s eyes, so far removed from the ones she had grown so fond of. “That’s an understandable reaction, Seven. However, there are always going to be innocents among those who wage war. What of those who never held a phaser?”

“They would be spared.”

“How would you determine who was who? My point, Seven, is that people have to look beyond their knee-jerk reactions if they are going to end the cycle of hatred and violence. What we want to do and what we can act on are completely different things. My knee-jerk reaction was to fly through the viewscreen and throttle Nechayev for the way she was openly glaring at you.”

“Aside from the obvious, why didn’t you?”

Kathryn smiled, of course her Borg would point out that it was impossible to fly through a viewscreen. “One, because there are laws against that sort of thing. Two, because she’s my superior officer and Starfleet frowns on that sort of thing. Three, because my feelings were born from my protectiveness of you,” she kissed her fingers. “And four, because it's against everything I stand for, morally and ethically. Everyone is entitled to their own thoughts and feelings. I can’t go around decking everyone who does something I don’t like or agree with. You’re proposing genocide because of suffering a very deep loss. Does that sound like an equitable solution?”

Seven looked down. “No. I believe I understand. Thoughts are only that until they are put into action.”

“Exactly, love.” Kathryn leaned over and kissed her. “Now, what’s for dessert?” She waggled her eyebrows and grinned. 

  
  


~~~

  
  


“Harry, put it up on screen,” Janeway said quietly as she gripped the arms of her command chair.

The viewscreen came to life and there she was, Earth. Suspended against the inky blackness of the space surrounding her. The big blue marble. There was a collective gasp before the bridge erupted into a cacophony of cheers. Janeway stood and held up her hand. “There’ll be time for this later, people. We still have a job to do. “Harry, keep the viewscreen open. Tom, what’s our ETA?

“Estimated Time of Arrival is fifteen minutes, Captain.”

Janeway wanted to jump up and down a squeal for joy, but to look at her, one would never know it. “Very well, Lieutenant, steady on.”

“Captain, we're being hailed priority one, it’s the _Enterprise_.”

“I’ll take it in my ready room, Lieutenant Kim.”

Janeway punched in the command and Jean Luc shimmered onto her little viewscreen.

“Jean Luc,” she dipped her head in greeting. “By the way, the next time you board my ship without asking for my permission, we’re going to have to have a little chat.” She narrowed her eyes at her peer.

He smiled and nodded knowingly; he wouldn’t have liked it either and wouldn't have respected a Captain who didn’t take him to task for his breach of protocol. “Understood, Captain,” he responded. He knew she wouldn’t expect an apology, and he smiled warmly when he saw her eyes soften from his acknowledgment. “Now, I wonder if you wouldn’t mind shuttering your screen and ordering an all stop for a moment.”

“And, why would I do that, Jean Luc?” She said, with a curious expression.

“As you know, you’ve picked up quite a few escorts along the way…”

“Yes, I believe there’s a betting pool along those lines,” she said smiling.

Jean Luc grinned. “How much are you in for?” he asked with a chuckle.

“Four hundred credits,” she laughed, “and you?”

“I’m down for eight hundred.” They shared a conspiratorial look, and then Jean Luc said, “So, about this all stop, Kathryn, would you be willing to indulge this old Captain, even if he _did_ break protocol?”

She narrowed her eyes at him curiously, having no idea what he was up to. “I’ll indulge you, Picard, but it’s gonna cost you.”

He raised his eyebrows, already suspecting the price, given Janeway’s reputation. “Oh?”

“Twenty cases of your finest vintage, delivered to my mother’s farm.”

“Twenty!” He laughed in surprise.

“This all stop is keeping me from home, Jean Luc,” she said, as she nonchalantly wiped an invisible speck of dust off of her desk, “you should be grateful I’m not asking for fifty,” she said, flashing him with her most disarming smile.

He was well aware of how negotiating tactics worked as he, himself, was quite skilled at it. 

Narrowing his eyes shrewdly, he countered, “Ten.”

Janeway lifted her eyebrows and tapped her forefinger against her lips, simply to draw the moment out, “Eighteen.”

“Done,” he said with a smile still plastered on his face, “but I would have given you the twenty.”

“I would have taken fifteen,” she grinned, “you’ll have your all stop momentarily, Jean Luc. Janeway out.”

She strode from her ready room and took her place in her command chair. “Harry, shutter the viewscreen. Mister Paris, all stop.”

“Viewscreen shuttered,” Harry confirmed.

Tom hesitated briefly before complying. “All stop, Captain.”

She didn’t explain the order simply because she didn’t have to. After twenty minutes of waiting, she had had about enough of it.

“Incoming hail, Captain, it’s the _Enterprise_.”

“Onscreen,” she said, as she stood up to greet Picard.

The images of Jean Luc Picard, William T. Riker, Deanna Troi, Lieutenant Worf, Doctor Crusher and Mister Data filled the screen. Each and every one of them were snapped so tightly to attention Janeway thought they might break. 

“The Captain of the USS _Enterprise_ thanks Captain Kathryn Janeway for her kind indulgence in this matter. If Captain Kathryn Janeway would be so kind as to turn her forward viewscreen on, this Captain would be honored and humbled.” When Picard finished speaking, he snapped himself a bit tighter, something Janway hadn't thought possible.

Moved by the use of formal military syntax, in addition to the postures of respect, Janeway felt the hot sting of tears as a nice sized lump rose up in her throat. 

She took a deep breath, slammed down the command mask, and answered, “This Captain thanks the Captain of the USS _Enterprise_ , and her crew.” She flicked a finger at Harry who brought the forward viewscreen off of standby.

When the image shimmered into view, Captain Kathryn Janeway, teetered unsteadily on her feet before falling backwards into her command chair. 

  
  


Stretched out before them, with Earth hanging there as a backdrop, were hundreds of ships hanging there in space. Each one had taken up opposite positions along _Voyagers_ port and starboard, their bows pointed upward, forming the Starfleet version of the Arch of Swords. In the history of Starfleet, it had only been done once; when Captain James Tiberius Kirk brought the USS _Enterprise_ NCC-1701 home from its five year mission.

Everyone on the bridge stood straight and tall, tears flowing freely down their faces. Even Seven of Nine recognized the significance of the moment and moved to stand beside her wife’s seat. When Janeway could trust herself to speak, she said, “Tom, take us through,” choking slightly on the last words.

“Yes Ma’am,” he choked in reply and moved _Voyager_ onward. It took nearly thirty minutes at minimum impulse. As they were nearing the end, the final two ships, the _Enterprise_ and the USS _Nautilus_ slowly closed the exit gap and dipped their bows downward. 

“Full stop, Tom.”

“Aye, Captain, full stop.”

“Captain…”

“I know Lieutenant, on screen.”

One side of the viewscreen contained an image of Picard and crew and the other side was filled with Captain Kiyoko Sulu and her bridge crew. All of them snapped to attention.

Janeway shakely got to her feet, waving off the subtle hand that had reached out to help her stay steady. Seven understood. 

“The Captain of the USS _Nautilus_ thanks Captain Kathryn Janeway for her kind indulgence in this matter. The Captain and crew bid you welcome home.” 

“The Captain of the USS _Enterprise_ thanks Captain Kathryn Janeway for her kind indulgence in this matter. The Captain and crew bid you welcome home.” 

Captain Janeway dipped her head in acknowledgement because she knew better than to try and speak. After the communication was cut and the viewscreen pointed, again, at Earth, Kathryn allowed Seven to help her into her seat. She didn’t dare look at her wife or she wouldn’t have been able to keep herself together, command mask or no.

The _Enterprise_ and _Nautilus_ both gracefully resumed their places in line, their bows still pointed downward, signaling the closure of the Arch.

“Harry…” she croaked, “play that back on all internal monitors.” She heard the tweeps of his console as he obeyed the order. She understood perfectly why he couldn’t verbally acknowledge it but now wasn’t the time to let people slide. “Lieutenant?”

“Playback has commenced, Captain.” Harry’s voice broke up but he made it through.

“We’re approaching Earth’s exosphere, Captain.”

She thought he sounded like a kid in a candy store. “Take us down, Tom.”

“Harry, viewscreen off.” 

“Everyone, prepare for a bumpy ride.”

“Entering exosphere now.” Tom reported. 

The inertial dampers kept the ship feeling steady as they approached the next level of the Earth’s atmosphere.

“Entering thermosphere,” Tom reported, “and in 4, 3, 2, 1, we’re through.”

“Viewscreen, Harry.”

The blue sky that greeted them was a sight for sore eyes. “Take us home, and Tom?”

“Yes, Captain.”

Janeway knew they would be in San Francisco in a matter of minutes. “Have you ever assessed the maneuverability of an Intrepid Class starship in atmosphere before?”

He turned around in his seat with a big grin on his face. “I can’t say I have, ma’am.”

“Well, there’s a first time for everything Mister Paris, I would like your _official assessment_ before we stand down _Voyager_.”

“Yes, ma’am!”

“And, Tom?” She said grinning wildly.

“Captain?”

“Make it good.” She winked and then gazed at her wife momentarily before turning back to the viewscreen.

“Yes, ma’am! Approaching San Francisco now, Captain. Hang on to your hats!” He said as he brought _Voyager_ down to a safe hard deck and then pushed her into a vertical barrel climb. From the ground, the bright California sun glimmered off of her Delta battered skin. He brought her from vertical, and then pointed her nose down into a spinning power dive, heading straight for the Golden Gate Bridge. He pulled her up before her wash would shake the bridge apart, and then proceeded to pace her through some horizontal barrel rolls and back into a vertical climb. At the apex, he shocked her into a few end-over-end maneuvers before plunging her back down into a spinning power dive. He brought her to a hover over the bridge and put her through a series of end over end barrel roll maneuvers before setting her down gently onto the landing pad. Her struts groaned in protest as she settled onto terra firma.

Tom was breathless and grinning.

“So, how’d she handle?” Janeway asked, grinning just as wide as he was.

“She’s a bit sluggish in the AOT maneuver, ma’am, but otherwise, smooth as butter.”

“I don’t recall the Ass Over Teakettle maneuver being part of a standard atmospheric handling assessment,” she said, her eyes sparkling, “Consider your oral report submitted. Chakotay, enter it in the ship's log.”

Judging by the green tinge to Chakotay’s skin, he was probably never so grateful for inertial dampers. He entered the report with shaky fingers.

“Harry, open a shipwide.”  
  
“Channel open, Captain.”

“Voyager crew, you have your orders. I know you’re all as anxious as I am to see your friends and family again. Bear with us a little while longer.Janeway out.”

“Janeway to Lieutenant Torres”

“Torres here, Captain.”

“Power down engines.”

“Yes, ma’am, powering down.”

The lights dimmed briefly as the battery backup came online.

They knew it wasn’t over yet but Janeway swore she felt the ship shudder and shake from all of the celebration going on. The bridge, as it was, remained silent. Each officer stood straight backed, heads held high, awaiting their final order.

“Prepare to disembark, dismissed.”

It took nearly two hours for each of the crewmen to walk down the gangplank and disembark. Captain Janeway greeted each of them by name, shaking their hands as they passed her by. Once off the ship, crew had been ordered to form a line, four rows deep, off of the port stern. The senior bridge staff having been the last to go, formed a separate line at the bottom of the gangplank followed by Seven. 

The Captain took a deep breath and closed her eyes. _Voyager_ had been her home for the past fourteen years, longer than she had ever lived in any singular structure. She had gotten married, fallen in love, and found her _life_ on this ship. Moreso, she had found herself. Once she walked down that gangplank, she would surrender her command, and lose her crew, who had become her family. She would lose her home. She steeled herself against the tide of emotion that was sure to come by slamming her command mask down with the singular purpose of getting her through the next few hours. She straightened her spine and started the long walk down the gangplank, stopping in front of Admiral Nechayv, and snapping to attention. 

“Captain Kathryn Elizabeth Janeway, you are hereby ordered to surrender your command of USS _Voyager_ Registry NCC-74656, and stand her down,” Nechayv stated crisply.

“Captain Kathryn Elizabeth Janeway does hereby surrender command of USS _Voyager_ Registry NCC-74656 and stand her down, sir,” she stepped forward and formally presented the Admiral with the PADD containing her command codes, and then stepped crisply back.

“Captain Kathryn Elizabeth Janeway, you are now relieved of command of USS _Voyager_ Registry NCC-74656. Starfleet thanks you and your fine crew for your years of exemplary service. You and your brave crew may now stand down.”

She raised her hand in a crisp salute. She had no idea how she kept her voice so steady, as she barked out the most devastating words of her life. “I stand relieved, sir.”

“You are dismissed.” Nechayv barked.

The crowd was deafening as they cheered and shouted. The thin blue line of soldiers who had previously held the crowd at bay, stepped aside and released the throng. Only family members and Starfleet brass had been allowed on the inner circle of the presidio grounds, but throngs of other onlookers had gathered to get whatever glimpse they could of the lost starship come home.

Janeway couldn’t move. Her eyes darted from scene to scene yet nothing registered in her. She knew the families of the crew were hugging them, picking them up and twirling them around, and nothing. She looked into the concerned eyes of her wife and still nothing. Naomi Widman ran up to her and threw her arms around her legs, sobbing, asking if she would still be her Captain’s Assistant. She patted her on the head and said something to her that made the little girl smile, but she had no idea what it was. She turned her eyes back to the crowd. There, she could see them weaving and bobbing their way through. Her mother and sister hurried their pace until it turned into a run. She felt them crash against her and wrap her in frenzied arms. Hers hung limply at her sides. She could hear her mother saying words against the side of her head. Some of them, ‘so happy you’re home’ and ‘don’t ever scare me like this again’ made their way through the fog in her brain, but most did not. She could hear Phoebe saying, “it’s about time…” but the rest was lost on her.

Seven watched the scene unfold, unsure of what to do. Kathryn’s face was pale, her eyes unseeing as they darted this way and that. Even now, wrapped up by Gretchen and Phoebe, she just stood there. Arms stiffly at her sides. She saw the two women finally release their hold on her and take a half step back. Confusion and shock turned to concern as they took in the sight of Janeway. Phoebe reached her hand out and snapped her finger in Kathryn’s ear. When she got no response, she waved her hand in front of Kathryn’s face yelling, “Earth to Kathryn...Earth to Kathryn…”

Gretchen and Phoebe looked at each other and then turned to Seven. She wasn’t sure what to do. She opened her mouth to speak, but nothing came out. Phoebe stepped up to her and said, “It’s really nice to meet you, but we have to get her the hell out of here.”

“I concur,” she said, as she scooped Kathryn up in her arms. “Direct me to your shuttle.” Phoebe led the way, shouting above the din of the crowd for people to, “make way.” The crowd parted for them as the cacophony of laughter and celebration fell to hushed murmurs. The _Voyager_ crew among them, snapped to attention and gave crip salutes as their Captain was carried from the presidio grounds. 

With Kathryn still in her arms, Seven boarded the shuttle and took her seat. She felt the shuttle lift off and looked at her wife once again. “Kathryn, can you hear me?”

Kathryn was vaguely aware of a voice, it sounded like Seven. _Why can’t I move!?_ She tried to move her head, her eyes...anything...her body remained steadfast in its refusal.

“Jesus H. Christ on a cracker, Seven! What the hell happened to you guys out there?” Phoebe said, as she leaned over the body of her sister.

Seven looked up at her, noting in passing that she had the same eyes as Kathryn, “We...encountered many difficulties during our time in the Delta Quadrant. However, I have never seen Kathryn like this. It is frightening me.”

Gretchen took Kathryn’s hand and smoothed it lovingly. “Kathryn, you’re home now. You’re safe. We’re on our way to the house. I’ve got a roast in the crock-pot and I’ve made you your favorite brownies,” she said, as if the mere mention of comfort food would bring her around. 

No response.

Unsure of what else to do, Seven bent her head down next to Kathryn’s ear and began cooing the phrases of comfort Naomi Wildman had taught her. She wasn’t sure if she could even hear her, but it was helping to abate some of the terror Seven was feeling at seeing her wife in that state.

When the shuttle landed, they transferred to a smaller taxi-craft for the final leg of the journey to the Janeway farm. Being a traditionalist settlement, there were restrictions on the size of the shuttles that could enter. The small craft had room for four passengers, the pilot and a very small cargo area in the aft. The pilot had insisted that each person have their own seat but after seeing the look in Seven’s eyes, he threw up his hands muttering something about not being responsible if anyone got hurt.

To try and break the tension in the back, the taxi driver said over his shoulder, “Hey, isn’t that someone from _Voyager_ ?” He glanced behind him and was met with three sets of very angry eyes. _I’ll just keep my damn mouth shut,_ he thought.

Seven continued to coo softly in her wife’s ear, vaguely aware of the conversation happening around her.

“I’ve never seen her this way, Phoebe, not even after your dad and Justin died. It has to be the shock of being home after so long. Yes...that has to be it,” Gretchen said, trying to still her rising panic.

Phoebe shook her head slowly. “She was in pretty bad shape then, but this...I don’t even know what this is. Maybe we should call a doctor?” She turned to Seven to ask what she thought. Seeing her huddled over Kathryn, whispering in her ear as she was, she didn’t figure the woman was any more capable of answering that Kathryn was.

“She just needs time to adjust, Phoebe. This has got to be a terrible shock for her. I remember when Edward had to surrender his commands; he dragged it around with him for days, sometimes. She’s been on _Voyager_ longer than she’s ever lived anywhere. No, no, let's just give her some time. If she doesn’t snap out of it, then we'll call a doctor.”

Phoebe looked at her sister again and then nodded. “Okay, Mom, but seriously, if she doesn't snap out of this today, I’m calling someone regardless of what you think.”

“We’re here,” Gretchen said, never one to state the obvious, she just wanted to say something.

Seven unfolded herself and the precious woman she carried, and started for the house. Phoebe held her hand up, forestalling any further progress. Seven noted the wicked gleam in her eye and would have smiled about it if circumstances were different. It was the same look Kathryn got sometimes. “Stay right there; I know exactly what’ll snap her out of this.”

Seven watched her disappear into the house and looked at Gretchen, who was sobbing softly as she looked at her daughter. Seven felt a lump forming in her throat as she felt the pain and helplessness radiating off of the matriarch of the Janeway clan. She understood what people had meant now by having a ‘sympathy cry.’’’ 

The women looked up when they heard the screen door slam and saw Phoebe carrying a five gallon bucket. Gretchen started to shake her head, “no”, and stepped back several feet. The younger Janeway swung the bucket back and then forward, letting the contents fly. Nearly five gallons of icy water splashed over Kathryn in a deluge, causing her to jump and sputter in Seven’s arms. Kathryn struggled to be let down and glared at her sister. “Goddamn it, Phoebe! What in the hell did you do that for!”

Phoebe stood there with a stupid grin on her face and said, “Yep, it works every time! Welcome back to the land of the living, you insufferable twat!” That earned her a stern look from their mother, but she couldn’t help but smile as well, considering it had worked.

“What the hell are you…” Kathryn looked around her and saw, for the first time, where she was, and who she was surrounded by. She felt the blood draining from her face and didn’t even realize she was falling until she felt the strong arms of her wife holding her up. 

“Mama?” 

Gretchen nodded and pulled her into a fierce hug. When she felt the comforting arms of her mother surrounding her, she broke. Loud wracking sobs split the air, intermingled with the sound of wailing. Seven saw the two women slowly sinking to the ground and made the calculation of their rate of fall and risk of injury. When she saw there was no risk to either woman, she allowed it to happen. Phoebe wrapped her arms around Seven’s waist and bawled. Not used to being touched in that manner by anyone but Kathryn, she was taken aback for a moment. She quickly recovered and put her arm around her sister in law's shoulder, tugging her close.

Kathryn and Gretchen continued to huddle and rock each other on the ground as Kathryn’s loud, fierce wails and deep, shuddering sobs thundered through the air. Kathryn reached her arm up into the air. Phoebe ran over quickly and added herself to the pile. Kathryn wrapped her arm around her little sister while the sobbing and wailing intensified. Kathryn raised her arm up again, asking for Seven. She complied.

After what seemed like forever, Kathryn was finally spent, and now that she could feel her body again, she realized her knees hurt from being on the ground for well over an hour. She released her grip on the women and clutched her head with her hands, as it pounded relentlessly. Something was wrong. “Seven, call the doctor. I have a splitting headache.”

Seven touched her hand to the communicator that she, and all of the crew, were issued when they disembarked from _Voyager_ , “Seven to the Doctor.”

“Doctor here. Good to hear from you, Seven.”

“You are needed on the Janeway farm immediately.”

“Well, I can be there in about an hour. Is it an emergency?” The doctor asked. 

Seven looked at Kathryn. She had shifted her position slightly, knees and elbows on the ground with her head clutched in her hands, groaning. 

“Yes. Seven out.”

Seven helped Kathryn to her feet, asking silently if she could make it into the house. Kathryn gave her a look that said she wasn’t sure but wanted to try. Her clothes were still slightly damp from the soaking she had received over an hour ago so Phoebe ran ahead to get her something dry to put on. 

Gretchen on one side of her, and Seven on the other, she managed to get to the sofa. Gretchen went into the kitchen and came back with a glass of water and two round white capsules Seven could’t immediately identify. “Here, Kathryn. Take this.”

“Jesus, mom, I’m not two!”

“You may not be two anymore Kathryn Elizabeth Janeway, but I’m still your mother. Take the goddamn aspirin, and be quiet about it.” 

Kathryn sat up and did what she was told just as Phoebe came bouncing down the stairs. She was about to thrust the clothes at Kathryn but thought better of it, seeing how much pain her big sister was in. She handed the clothing to Gretchen. “We need to get you into something dry, dear. Let’s get those pants off of you.”

Kathryn allowed her mother to help her get her pants off, not remembering she was wearing her 100% organic underwear from her honeymoon. Gretchen shot Seven an amused, knowing look and then slid the sweatpants onto her daughter. She unfurled the bundled up T-shirt and shot Phoebe a mock scowl, before slipping it over Kathryn’s head. Looking back up at Phoebe, she muttered, “Honestly, she just got home,” in a stern, yet playful tone.

Phoebe disappeared and came back with a cold cloth for Seven to put on Katryn’s forehead as she laid on the sofa, groaning intermittently.

Gretchen covered her with a light blanket and then sat down in the chair opposite of the sofa. Seven knelt on the floor beside Kathryn, holding her hand.

“So,” Gretchen said, looking at Seven, “this isn’t the ideal way for us to meet, but welcome to the family.”

Seven looked over at her and offered a small smile. “Thank you, Mrs. Janeway.”

“Oh no, now, we’ll have none of that. You’ll call me Gretchen or Mom,” she said with her eyes twinkling.

“You could call her Ma,” Phoebe interjected, “but she’d whip you with her eyeballs and let you starve to death.”

“Jesus H. Christ, Phoebe, behave yourself,” Gretchen said, whipping her with her eyeballs.

“See?” Phoebe chuckled. “That’s ‘the look.’ Seriously, are you hungry? It’s been a fuck all of a day for you two.”

Gretchen put her face in her hands and shook her head. Seven heard her mutter under her breath, “Jesus H. Christ on a cracker. The mouth on those girls… just like their father.” Gretchen would never admit it, but she knew she had almost as much to do with it as Edward had. 

Seven had to smile; Kathryn did, indeed, have quite a ‘mouth on her,’ especially during some of their more passionate encounters. One had started out with gentle touches and lingering kisses that had turned into an inferno of need. Kathryn had moaned to her, “...fuck me, Annika...fuck me hard…” and she had complied. They had an informative discussion afterward about how provocative that type of ‘dirty talk’ could be when used sparingly and at the right moments. They’d had several of those ‘right moments’ before arriving on Earth.

“Thank you, Phoebe. It has been a ‘fuck all’ of a day and I am feeling slightly hungry. However, I’ll wait until Kathryn is feeling better.”

“Oh, holy hell,” Gretchen whipped Phoebe with her eyes, “you’re already a bad influence on her and she’s only been here for an hour.”

Phoebe gave her best shrug of innocence and went into the kitchen. “And keep your filthy mitts off of the brownies!” Gretchen yelled after her. She heard Phoebe groan. She came back a minute later and handed Seven two bottles of water.

“I wasn’t even gonna get a brownie,” she mumbled, as she pouted.

“You are incorrect in your assessment...Mom,” Seven said, trying out the name, “Phoebe is not a bad influence on me. I _am_ married to Kathryn, after all. Our Engineer, B’Elanna Torres, also has a ‘filthy mouth’ and has taught me a number of colorful vulgarities.”

Phoebe went wide eyed then grabbed her sides, laughing hysterically. “Well, fuck me on a fence post, Seven, you’re gonna fit right in!”

Gretchen chuckled and shook her head. “You girls and your filthy mouths…” Gretchen couldn’t help but let the chuckle turn to a quiet laugh as she was reminded of better days when her husband was still with them.

Seven felt a warmth suffuse her as she realized that she, too, was included when Gretchen said, ‘you girls.”’ She belonged.

They heard a knock on the door and Phoebe sprang up to answer it. There stood a bald man in a ’fleet uniform, carrying a med kit. “You must be the doctor; come on in.”

She led him to the living room where Kathryn was lying on the sofa with a cold cloth on her head.

He glanced at the other women present and then turned to his patient. “Tell me what happened, Seven.”

“After the ceremony, she just stared. She couldn’t move or walk. When we arrived here at 14:41, Phoebe Janeway threw a bucket of ice water on her, after which she and...Mom...sank to the ground and....”

“I’m aging, Seven,” he said dryly.

“She has a fuck all of a migraine,” Phoebe interjected.

“Ah, thank you.” 

“I’ve given her two aspirin, if that makes any difference,” Gretchen piped in.

“Hardly,” the doctor said sardonically, as he ran the tricorder over her head and chest.

“Her dopamine levels are slightly increased, which is a normal response to pain. Her vital signs are also slightly elevated. Otherwise, she’s the picture of health. I’m not surprised she has a migraine. She’s been working herself to the bone for fourteen years and today, well, lets just say it couldn’t have been easy on her.” With a hiss of the hypospray the medicine entered her bloodstream. He took her readings again and nodded his balding head. “Her vitals and dopamine levels are returning to normal.”

Kathryn opened her eyes, thankful that the pounding had abated somewhat. “Thank you, doctor.” It took her a moment to realize she wasn’t in sickbay. She held her hand out, and felt the warmth of Seven’s hand gently gripping it. Still holding Seven’s hand, she slowly sat up and tried to acclimate to her surroundings. Nothing had changed since the last time she had been there, with the exception of the sofa. Rather than the hard cushions and loud floral pattern, she sat on something soft, cushy and deep purple? “When the hell did you get this, Mom?”

Gretchen rolled her eyes and looked pointedly at Phoebe. 

“Ya, well, I may have had too much to drink one night and may or may not have spewed a psychedelic rainbow all over the old one,” she said with a shrug, “Mom said that she was never sitting on that ‘goddamned thing’ again, so I bought her a new one.”

Gretchen chimed in, “It was free so I didn’t complain about the color.”

“Much…” Phoebe added.

Kathryn looked at one, and then the other, and broke out in a laugh. “I gotta tell ya Mom, it’s not the first time that ugly thing got puked on.”

Gretchen rolled her eyes again and muttered, “Jesus H. Christ. You girls are the reason we could never have nice things in this house.” Amusement lit up her eyes, and it made Seven feel warm. Gretchen looked back and forth between Kathryn and Seven and said, “You two will find out when you have a brood of your own.”

Kathryn and Seven looked at each other for a moment and smiled. They weren’t ready to share the information quite yet, but a plan was already in the works for that very thing. The doctor cleared his throat to remind everyone he was still in the room, feeling quite left out.

“Doctor… what? I am aware that you are a hologram but even a hologram has to have a proper name, don’t you?” Gretchen said.

The Doctor looked at Kathryn, “Oh yes, I meant to tell you after the ceremony, but couldn’t find you. Starfleet had to enter a name for me into the registry.” Feeling like joining in with the family, he rolled his eyes.

Kathryn raised her eyebrows, “Did they now?”

“Yes, they chose Joseph Adams.” His eyebrows pointed downward. Janeway almost laughed at his attempt at a pout. Instead, she pressed her lips together and nodded. “So, Joe it is then. It’s a hell of a lot better than Shmullus.”

Joe looked at her with a harsh glare, “There were reasons for that.”

“I am aware, Joe. Congratulations on finally having a name. Would you like to stay for dinner?” She asked, knowing full well he couldn’t eat, but thinking he might need some company.

“Holograms don’t eat, as you know, but I would be happy to be in the company of such a lovely group of ladies. He pointed at Janeway’s shirt with his eyes, “Who would have guessed?” he said with his usual acerbic wit.

Kathryn looked down at her chest and printed in bold letters, the T-shirt said, “I suck at apologies so go unfuck yourself or whatever.”

Kathryn’s eyes narrowed. “Oh, Jesus, Mary and Joseph. Phoebe!”

Phoebe giggled and took off up the stairs at a run, with Kathryn close behind.

“Another patient, healed by my skilled hands.” Joe said, smiling as he wobbled his head from side to side.

Gretchen shook her head and smiled as she got up and went to the kitchen. “Those girls are going to be a minute. Seven, come help your Mom set the table.” Seven and Joe followed Gretchen and Seven could hear two sets of feet stomping and peels of muted laughter coming from upstairs. She decided right then that it was good to be ‘home.’

  
  


Kathryn unpacked her duffel bag, hanging up clothes and putting them away in a childhood dresser that suddenly seemed too small. Her sides still ached from being tickled mercilessly by Phoebe, and her cheeks hurt from smiling so much. Dinner was spent with Joe regaling Gretchen and Phoebe with tales from _Voyager._ He was especially proud to announce that he was the first sentient hologram in the history of the Federation, although he wasn’t very happy with the name they registered for him. Seven handed the few items of clothing she had to Kathryn, who added them to their respective places beside her own.

Kathryn slid out of her clothes and crawled under the covers of her childhood bed, lifting the covers for Seven. She stayed propped up on her side until Seven settled in, lying on her back. She wrapped her arm around Seven’s abdomen and laid her head on her shoulder. “You and Pheebs were right. It really has been a fuck all of a day, but it’s so good to finally be home.” 

Seven pulled her a little closer. “When do you need to report back to Starfleet?”

“They’re giving us a month long furlough before the inquiries start. I don’t even want to think about it; they’re probably gonna knock me back to Ensign.”

Seven felt her tense up as she spoke. “You don’t have to think about it, Kathryn. Allow yourself some time to enjoy being with your family again.”  
  
“I swear, Phoebe will be the death of me yet,” she chuckled.

“If she hasn’t killed you by now, Kathryn, it seems unlikely that she will at any future date.”

Kathryn could hear the smile as Seven bent her head down and kissed her softly, a wonderful jolt of electricity surging between them. Seven rolled onto her side and ventured further into the kiss as her hand wandered up and down Kathryn’s side, coming to rest on her naked hip. Kathryn deepened the kiss, scraping her nails lightly across Seven’s back on her way up to grab a handful of her hair, pulling her mouth closer. Seven moaned into the kiss as she explored her lover’s mouth with her tongue. Kathryn arched her back, pressing their breasts closer together as a sound of pleasure rose up from somewhere deep within her, and was captured by Seven’s mouth, making Seven moan even louder. Seven slowly pulled back and looked at her wife. Moonbeams from the open window danced in Kathryn’s eyes making Seven’s heart catch in her throat. She traced her lips with her fingertip and whispered, “Beauty is not irrelevant,” she kissed her softly, “and you are so beautiful it makes my heart ache.”

  
  
  


Kathryn whimpered into Seven’s kiss and crushed them together as tightly as she could. “I can’t get you close enough, Annika…”

Seven pulled Kathryn on top of her and kissed her with all of the love that was overflowing from her heart. 

“I can feel how much you love me when you kiss me… make love to me… ” Kathryn breathed into Seven’s mouth. 

Seven brought her thigh up between Kathryn’s legs. “You’re aroused,” she whispered in Kathryn’s ear and then sucked her earlobe into her mouth. 

“You have that effect on me, darling,” she said, before she brought her mouth down on Seven’s with excruciating tenderness. Seven opened her legs and allowed Kathryn’s thigh access; her breath became a sob when it pressed against the juncture. She undulated against Kathryn with an urgent need and Kathryn responded in kind, letting Seven set the pace. They were both moaning with wild abandon as their lovemaking grew more fervent. “Kathryn…” Seven panted, “...now…”

Kathryn slid her hand down and nestled her fingers into Seven’s wet fold, plunging inside of her while her tumb played on her clitoris, alternating between light and hard strokes and flicks. Seven did the same on Kathryn, knowing how much she enjoyed the feel of Seven inside of her. “Oh, Kathryn… I want to taste you… I want you to come all over me…” Seven growled, sending Kathryn into a frenzy. Making deep husky grunts and groans, she ground down on Seven’s hand faster and harder until she was just about there. 

Kathryn felt herself starting to go over the edge and quickly moved up, straddling Seven’s face, grinding into her hard and fast. Seven knew what her lover needed and sucked her clit hard into her mouth, flicking her tongue over it in a frenzy as she drew her mouth back, and sucked it in again, letting her teeth graze across it gently. Kathryn’s hips thrashed against her, and she dipped her tongue inside of her, wanting absolutely every drop of Kathryn’s essence in her mouth. 

“Oh god, Annika… I love fucking your mouth like this,” she said between moans. Seven reached down and dipped into her own wetness and started rubbing her clitoris, wanting to come with her wife. Kathryn’s voice was almost one continuous moan, as her hips kept moving faster. Seven knew it was time and brought herself to climax as Kathryn’s deep throaty moan filled the air.

She climbed off of Seven and gave her a deep, long kiss, enjoying the taste of herself. Seven brought her hand up to Kathryn’s mouth, who sucked Seven’s fingers in, letting their tastes intermingle. Seven kissed her again, teasing Kathryn’s lips with her tongue, just the way she liked to be teased, and their passion ignited once more.

Gretchen Janeway was no stranger to passion; she and her husband had a very active love life. Nor was she a stranger to the passionate noises coming from her daughter’s bedroom. She smiled, knowing that Kathryn was finally happy, put her earplugs in, and went to sleep.

Phoebe was awakened by Kathryn’s headboard pounding against their adjoining wall and was more than tempted to tell them to shut the fuck up. Since Kathryn was finally getting some, and with her drop-dead gorgeous wife at that, she simply gathered up a blanket and pillow, and quietly padded down the hall to the stairs. Her eyeballs nearly popped out of her head as she passed Kathryn’s closed-door; she knew her sister had a filthy mouth, but she wasn’t prepared for the words she heard coming out of the room. She snickered to herself, pushed her eyeballs back in her head, and plodded down the stairs to the sofa.

Freshly showered and fresh from… other things… Kathryn and Seven headed downstairs to figure out what to do with the rest of their day. Kathryn wanted to show Seven everything, but didn’t really know where to begin. She had never had the desire to share things close to her heart with anyone. The smell of coffee filled the air and Kathryn took a moment to deeply inhale the heavenly fragrance. They walked through the living room, noting in passing that there was a curly haired lump under a blanket, and then into the kitchen. Kathryn gave her mom a big hug and a kiss on the cheek, “That smells divine, Mom. New blend?”

“Yes, I got it especially for you when I heard you were coming home. It’s from Coventry Farms. His wife, Fefe, has gotten quite the following over the years”.

“Well, I can’t wait to taste it, then.” Gretchen handed her a mug, anxious to see how she liked it. 

Kathryn took a sip of the hot brew and her eyes lit up like a warp core. 

Phoebe drug herself into the kitchen and bumped Kathryn with her hip, a mischievous gleam in her eyes, and said, “That’s not all you can’t wait to taste from what I heard… all… night… long.”

Kathryn, who had just taken another drink, proceeded to spray all over her sister. Phoebe stood there, nonplussed, licked her index finger, and made an invisible mark in the air. She grinned at her sister and quipped, “That’s one point for me.”

Kathryn narrowed her eyes, giving her sister a force ten glare, and Phoebe laughed. “You can’t pull that shit on me, Katie Lizzy Lou Lou. I’m gonna go shower and change.” As she plodded away, she muttered to herself, “Maybe I should change that nickname to Katie's horney hoo-hoo… ” 

Gretchen took her coffee to the table muttering something about ‘those girls’ and took a seat, offering one to Seven. Kathryn had just finished cleaning up the floor when Gretchen piped in with, “Jesus H. Christ, Kathryn, where are your manners? Offer my daughter-in-law some coffee.”

“It is of no consequence, Mom. I don’t drink coffee,” Seven said matter of factly, noting it was getting easier to call Gretchen ‘Mom.’

Gretchen’s eyebrows shot up to her hairline, and she looked at Kathryn. “She doesn’t drink coffee? That’s it then; you can’t stay married to this woman,” her blue eyes sparkled with amusement.

Seven knew she was being teased and it elated her.

Kathryn rolled her eyes at her mother and brought a glass of water to the one who had taken her heart so completely. Seven took the offered glass, and was pleasantly surprised when Kathryn bent down and placed a gentle kiss on her lips.

“What do you girls want for breakfast?” Gretchen asked, resisting the urge to add, “aside from each other.” She couldn’t hide the knowing grin that crept across her lips, so she avoided eye contact with the two of them, well-aware they would get more than their share of jibes from Phoebe.

“I would love an omelet, hash browns, and some bacon, Mom.” Kathryn sat beside her wife.

“Seven, what would you like?” She opened the old fashioned refrigerator and pulled out a carton of eggs, a green pepper, onions, mushrooms, bacon, and took the potatoes out of the water they had been soaking in.

Seven stood up and walked behind the large kitchen island. “I have had some experience with replication but no practical experience with cooking in the traditional manner. May I assist you, Mom?”

Gretchen’s face lit up and she handed Seven a knife, explaining to her, while she demonstrated the different types of cuts, the sizes she wanted, putting her to work. Kathryn sat back beaming, her mom seemed to adore Seven almost as much as she did.

Phoebe sauntered in, looking much more awake, and Kathryn happened to notice a single thick strand of silver hair against the backdrop of her long, dark curls. She snuck up behind her and plucked it out, reaching over her shoulder and holding it up triumphantly in front of her little sister's face.

“Well, Jeezus,” Phoebe exclaimed, “I guess I’ll have to add that to the collection.”

Kathryn licked her index finger and made the familiar “score a point for me” gesture in the air and then returned to her coffee. Phoebe poured herself a cup saying, “I hardly think that constitutes a point; you’re the one who gave me the goddamned things in the first place.” When she heard Kathryn’s sharp intake of breath and felt Seven boring a hole into her back, she knew she had crossed the line. She turned around to go sit beside Kathryn when her big sister suddenly burst out laughing. “Please stay very far away from me when you tell me you love me.”

The other two women looked at each other in confusion. Phoebe laughed and walked up to the kitchen island to snitch a mushroom from the cutting board. It was then that Gretchen caught the joke and started laughing. She calmed herself down for a moment, looked at Kathryn and deadpanned, “She tells me she loves me quite often. It’ll be nice for her to have a chance to share it with you.” Seven read Phoebe’s T-shirt and smiled. It said, “Farting is just my way of saying I love you.” 

“Kathryn also tells me she loves me in that manner; it must be a family trait,” she lifted the corners of her mouth up, happy that the moment of tension had passed. 

The Janeway women laughed until they cried while Seven continued to complete the tasks assigned to her, smiling all the while.


	7. Part 7 - Finding Home

**~~~**

  
  


Kathryn groaned as a pain shot up her back, and she reached out for Seven. “Kathryn, are you sure we don’t need to go?” Seven didn’t wait for her reply, looking to Gretchen instead. The elder Janeway, who was looking quite fetching in her formal ball gown, placed her hand on Kathryn’s very large stomach. “When was the last time you had a pain, dear?”

Kathryn reached her hand around to the small of her back and rubbed until she felt Seven’s strong hand take over. “Oh for christ sake. Will you two quit with the fussing? I’m fine. I’m just sick of being nine months pregnant,” she snapped a little more harshly than she had intended. 

“I tried to convince her that coming here tonight was a bad idea, but you know how she is,” Gretchen said to Seven. 

“I am aware, Mom. I still think you are partly responsible for her headstrong nature,” Seven said, with a warm gleam in her eye. “Nothing could have kept her from this tonight, if only for the chance to walk the corridors of her beloved  _ Voyager _ one last time, before she’s opened to the public.”

“Holy Christ, I can hear you two; I’m standing right here,” she said through her teeth, her eyes narrowed. Seven and Gretchen looked at each other and shrugged. Kathryn’s eyes swept the presidio of Starfleet Headquarters, looking, in particular for Phoebe, as she continued, “It still chaps my ass that they made her into a fucking museum. She should have been re-fitted and put back into space where she belongs.” Seven wondered if she was talking about  _ Voyager, _ or herself at that moment. Kathryn had, indeed been brought up on charges, all of which all ended up being thrown out. Nechayv didn’t seem to be very thrilled about that. Nor was she thrilled when Seven was cleared of the war crimes, charges Nechayv, herself, had brought against her. Nor was she happy about Kathryn’s promotion to Admiral. More to the point, she was absolutely livid that Kathryn was now her peer rather than her subordinate, and carried the weight of ‘hero’ status gracefully on her elegant shoulders. 

It took almost a year before the entire  _ Voyager _ crew was either formally cleared, or granted amnesty. As soon as the shit stopped hitting the fan, Kathryn and Seven made an appointment with Joe in order to start their family. Now, Kathryn was ready to be done. When she begged Joe to just transport the little fucker out of her, he gave her a list of reasons why it was too dangerous to do so. She had huffed at him and had given him her best force ten look, all to no avail. She was going to have to give birth like every other woman had done since humans started walking upright.

She found Phoebe trying to gracefully extricate herself from a small throng of admirers. She watched in amazement as her sister smiled gracefully at the Starfleet officers, dipped her head, and continued on her way to deliver the water Kathryn had asked for. This side of Phoebe was a far cry from the woman she had been earlier in the day, when she showed off her latest T-shirt creation...an artist's paintbrush, shaped vaguely like a phallus, which read, “Artists Give the Best Strokes.” 

Kathryn chucked at the recent memory, and wasn’t surprised to see the hungry gazes of the officers following her sister as she sashayed away from them. Her dark curls were cascading down her back like a waterfall and her eyes were made even more vivid by the deep blue evening gown that hugged her graceful curves. Kathrn felt both proud and jealous as she subconsciously rubbed her belly, feeling like a beached whale. The dress whites that usually made her look powerful and regal, were now making her feel utterly ridiculous. Seven, however, had never looked at her with more love radiating from her crystal blue eyes. She had made it a point to tell Kathryn how radiant she was, as their child grew within her. Her skin had taken on a luminous glow and her eyes burned a brilliant blue. Even her auburn tresses looked more brilliant, especially in the sunlight.

Kathryn felt a particularly hard kick and looked down at her stomach, “That will be enough out of you, missy, and that’s an order,” she growled.

B’Elanna Torres heard the exchange as she walked up to greet her former Captain. “Is she giving you some sass, Admiral?” Torres said, giving her a knowing smile. “You look like you’re about to pop. It’s hard to believe it’s been two years since we’ve been back in the Alpha, and even harder to believe,” she looked over her shoulder and pointed to  _ Voyager  _ with her eyes, “that she’s been completely decommissioned. I guess I should be grateful that they left her intact. Aside from the warp core conduits being capped off, she could lift off at any time she chose to.”

“You oversaw that didn’t you, B’Elanna?” Seven asked.

“Yeah, some Admiral,” she said, shooting a smile at Janeway, “wanted me to be brought in as lead consultant. She’s damn near as operational as she was in the Delta. Starfleet wanted her to be as ‘authentic’ as possible. Hell, it even has a rudimentary EMH that comes on when you enter sick bay. Naturally, none of the command consoles actually work, but it’s just a matter of unlocking some components and hooking them up.”

“Did I hear someone mention my far lesser cousin?” Joe said, as he sauntered into the conversation. He took one look at Admiral Janeway and ran his tricorder over her stomach. “Admiral, you should really be in a hospital right now; you could have this baby at any moment,” he didn’t try to hide his astonishment.

Kathryn gripped Seven’s hand as another pain settled into her lower back and she felt a slight burning sensation. She gave her stomach a force ten glare and brought her voice into its paint peeling register, “Belay that, now!”

The PA system played the Tinking of Glasses chime to get everyone’s attention as Admiral Paris stepped up to the microphone and began a heartwarming speech about the trials and tribulations of the Intrepid Class Starship,  _ Voyager _ .

Another pain ripped through Admiral Janeway nearly bringing her to her knees. Joe made a very quick assessment and told them all to come with him. He headed up the  _ Voyagers _ gangplank with Kathryn, Seven, Gretchen, Phoebe and B’Elanna right behind him. “Thank goodness we still have a working sickbay,” he mumbled as he strode through the familiar corridors on the way to the turbo lift. Gretchen and Phoebe, who had been very excited to finally see where Kathryn had spent fourteen years of her life, hardly noticed a thing.

Paris, noting the small group heading up the gangplank, quickly surmised the reason and extended his speech another few minutes. “In closing, I would like to say that Admiral Kathryn Janeway was scheduled to step in here. However, it appears that she is currently occupied with bringing a future Starfleet officer into our fold.” The crowd erupted in cheers. “Under the circumstances,” Paris continued, “deck five, section twelve will be closed to all visitors. Thank you all for your attendance tonight and with no further adieu, I present to you, The  _ Voyager _ Museum.”

Kathryn felt like her vagina was being torn apart by pissed off, ravenous targs. She leveled a look at Seven and growled, “ _ You _ did this to me!” Seven shot a panicked glance at Gretchen, who was smiling through her tears, “It’s okay, dear, she won’t remember this after the baby is born. It’s just the pain and hormones talking.” Seven swallowed, nodded her head, and returned her attention to her wife. As much as she hated to see her wife in such pain, she was grateful she had the foresight to offer Kathryn her Borg hand. The way Kathryn was gripping it, Seven felt fairly certain she would have crushed her human one.

Joe was sitting on a stool at the foot of the biobed, having deactivated the EMH as soon as he walked into sickbay. “She’s crowning! Admiral, push!” 

Phoebe bent down to see her niece being born, but decided better of it. “That’s more of your hoo-hoo than I ever want to see again. I feel like my eyeballs need a shower now.”

“Breathe, Kathryn,” Seven urged, earning her another death glare, but Kathryn made the effort to breathe in time with Seven. Seven could hardly believe everything had started from an undercover operation to keep her safe, and now… 

“One more big push, Admiral!”

Joe caught the fresh little lump in his arms and cleared the fluids from her nose and mouth. She curled up her little fists and began to wail. He wrapped her in a blanket and laid her on her mother’s chest. Kathryn wept warm salty tears, pulling Seven down to her as she looked at her brand new daughter, who was still wet and wrinkly. Kathryn and Seven counted her fingers and toes, and each took turns kissing the top of her head. Seven noted the reddish tint to her hair and knew she was going to be a ‘spitfire,’ just like her mother.

Gretchen and Phoebe hugged each other while tears streamed down their cheeks. Even Joe looked misty eyed… for a hologram.

“Admiral, may I?” Joe asked, glancing up at the speaker in the ceiling. 

“Kiernan Elizabeth-Hansen Janeway. Do it,” she ordered, feeling the order slide from her lips as easily as the love for her child had filled her heart.

B’Elanna opened the commlink and the cries of Kiernan filled every corner of  _ Voyager _ . B’Elanna announced, “Ladies and Gentleman, I present to you, the newest member of our Starfleet family, Kiernan Elizabeth-Hansen Janeway.” She cut the announcement off before her voice broke and then she sniffed loudly. 

The soft chime for admittance sounded and B’Elanna walked to the door. Pushing the intercom she asked who was there. She smiled and turned to Seven. “It’s Samantha and Naomi Wildman, Seven.”

Seven glanced at Kathryn and saw her head nod.   
  
She made sure to drape the gown over Kathryn’s legs and run her fingers through her hair. “Let them come, B’Elanna.”

Young Naomi Wildman, by human standards, appeared to be approximately 18 years old due to her Ktarian hybrid genes. She gave Seven a big hug, grinning from ear to ear, and stood at attention before the Admiral, who was cooing at the little bundle in her arms. “At ease, former Captain’s Assistant Wildman, before you sprain something,” she said, grinning at the young girl. She had grown so much on  _ Voyager _ and they had kept in touch since being back in the Alpha. Janeway had written her a glowing recommendation for early admission into Starfleet Academy; she was scheduled to begin at the start of the new semester. Naomi stood at parade rest and offered her congratulations, still beaming. Samantha walked quietly up to the biobed and gently stroked the peach fuzz on the top of Keirnan’s head. Through Naomi, Kathryn and Seven had also grown quite close to Samantha.

“She’s beautiful, you two,” she said looking between Seven and Kathryn. “I brought this for you. I was hoping to be able to make a clean getaway, but little Kiernan here spoiled it,” she said, grinning. She handed a wrapped gift to Seven, whose eyebrows rose in recognition. “This is the same paper our wedding gifts were wrapped in, Kathryn,” Seven smiled. She just happened to be wearing her ‘all you can eat’ panties.

Kathryn raised her eyebrows, “In that case, Sam, is it safe to open in front of our daughter?”

Samantha laughed, “It’s safe.” She bent over and gave little Kiernan a quick peck on the top of her head, and nodded her head at Naomi. “We’ll call you later, Seven,” she called on her way out of sickbay. Kathryn moved the sheet and put Kiernan up to her breast, hoping she would suckle. Kiernans little mouth tugged at her until settling into a sleepy rhythm while her little fist waved around in the air.

“I’m going to give you something for the pain, Admiral. It’s perfectly safe for Kiernan, and will last long enough for you to get home, so you can rest. Your endorphins are in overdrive now, but you’ll be sore for the next few days.” He pressed the hypospray to her neck, and she felt instant relief from the residual burning sensation. 

She clasped the hologram’s hand in her own and looked pointedly into his eyes. “Thank you, Joe. From now on, call me Kathryn. You’re partly responsible for this, ya know.” When they had first approached Joe about Kathryn wanting to get pregnant, he had made it a point to inform them that geneticists had made rapid advancements in the time they had been away, and they could now have a child by blending the DNA of both women.

His holographic matrix felt a pleasant tingle of electricity run through it. “Thank you, Kathryn. Now, let’s get you cleaned up, dressed, and on your way home.”

At Gretchen's urging, Kathryn and Seven had purchased a large plot of land, about a half a mile down the road from the farm, which happened to have a very large dilapidated old craftsman home on it. Kathryn had wanted to bulldoze it and start from scratch, but on their first walkthrough, Seven kept pointing out architectural details she felt were worthy of preservation. The tapered columns of the large covered front porch rested on thick stone supports set into the ground and inside, the original hardwood was in good enough shape to be refinished one more time. Tiger oak trim lined the doorways and windows, the top trim having the unique shape of an isosceles trapezoid. The upstairs featured three large bedrooms, a large shared bath and a reading nook, while the downstairs housed three bedrooms. One, a large master suite with a large ensuite, one large enough to be a shared office and another large bedroom with a small ensuite, which could become the guest room. Once Seven pointed out that replicators and communications systems could be installed and still fit in with the charm of the house, Kathryn had relented. Most of which were beyond repair, but three which could be restored, including a large hip roof barn which was still in good condition. Seven, being in the habit of not wasting anything, had opted to use salvaged wood from the other buildings to incorporate into the restoration of the other two. Phoebe had been instrumental in finding the right architects for the project; Seven was pleased with the progress that had been made. She had plans of turning one into a workshop. Kathryn had plans for the other to be used as overflow storage for feed and hay. They were still staying at the families’s farmhouse until renovations were completed. 

Seven had been very busy researching business requirements and start-up costs for a new venture into online propulsion, not having much luck being accepted into the mainstream of society. She had been cleared of all war crime charges the year before, around the same time Janeway became an Admiral, and now they were bringing their first child home. Seven would undergo the procedure next, as they wanted their girls to be close in age. Gretchen had laughed at the prospect and had warned them against having two toddlers in diapers, but the headstrong women were having none of it. They wanted it all, and they didn’t want to wait another second to get it. Their life in the Delta had proven one thing; anything can happen at any time. The time to embrace the best life has to offer, is when it’s right there in front of you.

~~~

Kiernan held her little arms out from her stroller, begging to be picked up. Kathryn scooped up the one year old and twirled her in circles, rewarded with her spontaneous giggles. Kathryn looked at Seven’s large belly and felt a twinge of empathy for her. She hadn’t had an easy pregnancy. Joe surmised it was due to her nanoprobes trying to expel a ‘foreign material’ inside of her, so she had ceased regenerating almost completely, leaving only the most vital nanoprobes active and the rest of them in stasis. Joe came out to their house on a weekly basis to keep her cortical node in alignment. As a result, she was often tired and listless. She snapped at Kathryn easily, and often, but always had a smile for her daughter. Kathryn wrapped her up in a hug and spoke softly to her, “We’re almost there, darling. How’d your check up with Joe go?”

“He said I am to remain patient and continue to ingest the proper nutrients. This is an inefficient form of procreation, Kathryn. I don’t know why you won’t allow me to place the fetus in a maturation chamber and be done with it. I could have built one in my workshop had it been done on schedule,” Seven’s brows furled downward and her bottom lip stuck out. Rather than rising to the bait and having another argument, Kathryn suppressed a chuckle; Seven had the same pout Kiernan did when she didn’t get her way about something. The child leaned forward and stuck a chubby finger against Seven’s lower lip and said, “Bd poo.” That did make Kathryn laugh; Seven glared at her wife.

Translating the baby babble into, “Pull your lip in before a bird poops on it,” Seven glared at her wife. “You are teaching her to have a filthy mouth, Kathryn.” 

Kathryn wanted to say something about the pot calling the kettle black, but thought better of it.

Kathryn, still chuckling, called in her assistant.

“Yes, Admiral?”

“I’m going to be taking the rest of the day off. Please make the necessary apologies and rearrange my schedule accordingly.

“Yes, Admiral, right away.”   
  
“You do not need to take the day off. I am still days away from my due date. The doctor has things well in hand.”

Seven reverting to Borg speak and calling Joe “the doctor” told her she  _ did _ need to take the day off, probably the next several, if Seven’s mood was any indication. Kathryn stopped by her assistant’s desk and informed her she would be taking the rest of the week off as well. If the Fleet Admiral didn’t like it, that was just too damn bad.

With Kiernan in her arms and Seven by her side, she made a call to Joe, asking him if he would mind staying with them for the next few days. She then made a call to B’Elanna to have her install a rudimentary holosuite in her office, so Joe could ‘rest his matrix’ as he called it, the hologram’s version of sleeping, she supposed.

Gretchen had taken over their kitchen in Seven’s absence, noting how easy the flow was from one workstation to the next. She had just added the chicken for her homemade chicken noodle soup when she heard the Hover Haul pull up. 

She shook her head at how close her daughter was cutting things. They had moved into their newly renovated house the week prior and due to some kind of error, all of the furniture they had ordered ended up lost in the system. Kathryn had pulled several strings to get it found and delivered by the time the new baby arrived. Gretchen had supplied them with a full set of kitchen gadgets, cookware, and dinnerware, and Phoebe, gods bless her, had arranged for a few strapping movers to move Kathryn’s bedroom furniture and Kiernan’s crib in. Gretchen let them borrow a couple of overstuffed chairs until their own furniture arrived. Seven wasn’t pleased, but also understood why Kathryn felt the strong need to be out of her mother’s house and into her own space. She, too, had wanted it, just not at the same time she was about ready to ‘pop.’ Kathryn made the argument that it was better to do it before the baby came than to try to do it after. Seven knew from the experience with Kiernan, that her wife was right.

Gretchen directed the movers hither and yon and within a couple of hours, everything had been moved in and set up. She had even talked the boys into dropping the borrowed chairs back at her house. She took her duffel bag into the guest room, which was now fully furnished and put her duffel bag on the bed. If Kathryn pitched a fit about her intention to stay with them until her next grandchild was born, she was going to have a fight on her hands. 

Kathryn was banking into her landing pad just as the Hover Haul was pulling out. “Well Jesus H. Christ, it’s about goddamned time. Looks like Mom was here when they arrived and look, there’s B’Elanna and Joe. They must have left about the same time we did.”

“Seven?” Kathryn set the craft on the landing pad, touched the button for the retractable hangar, and looked at her wife. Seven was clutching her crotch with wide eyes.

“There’s something wrong, Captain.”

Kathryn flew out of the small craft and hollered at Joe to get his ass over here. She flung the passenger door open as Joe appeared beside her. “Out of the way, Kate!” His uncharacteristic yell got her moving. Kiernan, woken up from commotion, started crying. Kathryn picked her up and held her tightly as she waited on news about her wife.

“Her water just broke, Kathryn. Your new daughter is fine, and so is Seven. Let’s get her in the house.”

Joe altered his holomatrix and carried Seven into the house with the rest of them hot on his heels. “Seven, we’re going to do this the old fashioned way so gravity can assist in the delivery. Kathryn, get something to protect the floor, this will be a bit...messy. Seven, I need you to get down on your knees and lean your torso over the arm of the chair. 

“Mom, go get one of those paint plastics to put down.”

Seven groaned as a contraction hit her. “Kathryn…” 

Kathryn knelt on the floor to the side of her, “I’m right here, Annika… just breathe…”

Kiernan started wailing, “Mom, take…”

Gretchen scooped up the child from where Kathryn had set her down and took her upstairs to her nursery, sorely disappointed to miss the birth of her next grandchild, but excited to have another one added to the brood. B’Elanna got to work in the office, installing the temporary holomatrix, just to have something else to do. If they needed her for something, she trusted that they would call for her.

“Breathe, Annika…”   
  
“I am breathing, goddamn it! I would cease to function otherwise!”

“I know, darling… I know.”

“Seven, you’re going to feel my hand on you now, just relax.” Joe’s tone was calming. “Okay, Seven, you’re going to want to push soon and I need you to resist that urge.”

“Resistance is Futile!” she spat. 

“Not in this case, Seven. I need to reposition the baby; the cord is wrapped around her neck.”

“Then, transport her out of my body. Now!”

“If only it were that easy. Resist, Seven,” he manipulated Seven’s uterus, pushing here and there and then checked his scan again. “She’s clear. Push, Seven.”

Seven strained through the burning and thought her vagina was going to rip apart from the inside out. “I am never doing this again, Kathryn. This is all your fault!”

From the other room, B’Elanna heard Joe telling Seven it was almost over and rushed up the stairs to watch Kiernan so Gretchen could be there for the actual birth. She gave B’Elanna a quick squeeze on the arm and headed down just in time to see Joe ‘catch’ the baby, clear her nose and mouth, and then hand her to Seven. Tears rolled down Seven’s cheeks, as she held her infant in her arms. She suddenly understood it was the very essence of what it means to be human. 

“Congratulations, you two. She’s a perfectly healthy baby girl. I’ll need to enter a name for her, Seven?” 

“Gretchen Annika-Hansen Janeway.”

Upon hearing the name, Gretchen burst into tears and hugged Seven close. “Thank you, Seven.”

“You have welcomed me into the family and given me something I don’t remember having… a mother,” she said, as she handed Gretchen the baby.

Joe wrapped a blanket around Seven and helped her stand. “I’m going to give you a hypospray of suspended nanoprobes to jumpstart your system again. You’ll feel better in no time, but you’ll need to regenerate for at least 48 hours to get back up to full strength, and before you ask, you can stop your regeneration cycle to feed little Gretchen.”

  
As soon as the suspended nanoprobes hit her bloodstream, her head cleared and she started feeling stronger. She leaned over and kissed Kathryn, who had tears in her eyes as she gazed at her and their new child. 

“Anni. We will call her Anni,” Seven said with a tilt to her head.

“Okay, Anni, then.”

“Kathryn, I need to shower. Assist me.” 

Kathryn kissed Anni on the head and helped her wife.

When they finished getting Seven cleaned up, she kissed her tenderly, gazing softly at her as only a spouse can. “You were so beautiful in there, Annika. I love you with all I am and all I ever will be.”

“I love you, too, Kathryn.” Seven wrapped her arms around her wife as Kathryn trailed kisses across her face.

Meanwhile, B’Elanna carried the very contented Kiernan downstairs to meet her new sister. Kiernan’s blue-grey eyes got wide and she squealed with delight. “Baba, baba, baba!”

She smiled at her Auntie B’Elanna and pointed her chubby little finger at Anni. “Baba, baba!”

The Klingon hybrid laughed and said, “Yes, it’s your baba sister…” She looked at Joe, waiting for him to tell her the child's name. 

“She is Gretchen Annika-Hansen Janeway; Anni for short.”

B’Elanna approved. “Yes, it’s your baba sister, Anni. Wave hello to Anni,” she said as she made exaggerated waving motions. Kiernan was pretty quick to catch on for a one year old.

  
  


Kathryn and Seven walked into the livingroom hand in hand, and Gretchen passed her namesake to her blonde haired mother. Seven sat down with her and put her to her breast. Anni latched on immediately and suckled. Seven was surprised at the slight sensation of pain, and shot Kathryn a questioning look. Kathryn offered up a lopsided grin. “You’ll get used to it, darling. Mom, has anyone called Phoebe?”

“I called her a few minutes ago. She’ll be here in about an hour.

Seeing that Anni was asleep, Kathryn gently took her from Seven, and kissed the thick blonde hair on the top of her head. “She is perfection, Annika.” Kathryn didn't think life could possibly get any better.

Seven’s eyes shown with pride and love, “just like her Mama Kathryn.” The two shared a lingering look, speaking nothing, yet saying everything.

“Kathryn, the holomatrix is set up if you need it. I’m gonna get back to HQ; I have things to do before reporting back to Utopia Planitia.”

Kathryn leaned over and gave B’Elanna a kiss on the cheek. “Thanks for everything, B’Elanna. We’ll see you next weekend for the cookout, won’t we?”

“I wouldn’t miss it. Seven, congrats, she’s beautiful.” B’Elanna nodded at Joe, gave Gretchen a quick hug, and was on her way.

“You’re welcome to stay for a couple of days, Joe, if you want to keep an eye on Seven...and maybe help with the girls?” Kathryn’s eyes jokingly pleaded.

“I also have to report back to HQ. They want me to give a lecture on Hologram Sentience in the modern age. Another time, perhaps?”

“Joe, you’re welcome here, any time,” Seven said, making the hologram smile broadly.

“Thank you, Seven.” Joe took his leave, humming an aria on his way out the door.

“I am going to regenerate. I am feeling drained. Please interrupt my cycle when it’s time for her to feed.” She kissed Kathryn and went into their bedroom, where her portable regeneration unit was hooked up.

Gretchen cradled a sleeping Kiernan in her lap, humming softly to her. “That just leaves us old hens, Mom. Are you staying?”

“Of course I am. Wild horses couldn’t drag me away from here.”

“I wouldn’t even let them try, Mom. It seems like it took me and Seven a very long time to get here, but I feel like we’ve finally found our way home.” She kept showering little kisses on Anni’s head, as she slept safely in her Mama K’s arms.

“After you and Phoebe were born, I felt that way, too, and now that I’ve held my grandchildren... I feel like my life is complete.”

Phoebe came rushing in, little paint splatters on her T-shirt and paint smeared hither and thither on her face, arms, and hands. “Oh my god, she’s beautiful!” she said as Kathryn tilted Anni toward her. “Jesus H. Christ, she’s the spitting image of Seven, isn’t she? Hey, you have furniture! Does that mean you have towels now, too? I brought a bag… ”

“Yeah, have at it. You’ll be upstairs. Mom’s already claimed the room down here, and Seven will be regenerating for the next couple of days.”

“Well shit, I guess it’s good we’re staying then; you’ll be pooped!”

“Mom...call Joe back and take the baby… ” Gretchen, recognizing the signs of one of Kathryn’s migraines, hurried and put Kiernan to bed, and then took the baby before calling Joe back. She helped Kathryn to the sofa. Thankfully, Joe hadn’t been gone long and it hadn’t taken him long to get back. Kathryn rolled onto her side and groaned, covering her mouth with her hand. Gretchen knew that gesture, and slid a waste bin in front of the sofa just in time. Kathryn emptied the contents of her stomach and laid back down, a cold sweat breaking across her skin. Joe didn’t bother to knock and quickly ran the tricorder over her as he’d done so many other times in the past two years. “Her vitals are consistent with all of the other ones. This doesn’t make any sense,” he pressed the hypospray against her neck and watched her color return. “Thanks Joe,” she said weakly.

“I think it’s time for you to come into HQ for more in depth scans than I can do from here, Kathryn. Something is obviously wrong. You have no biological markers for the sudden onset of migraines like you’ve been having, and you can’t tell me they haven’t been getting worse,” he said looking pointedly at the waste bin. “All of the scans I’ve done indicate there’s nothing wrong.”

“I’ll talk to Seven about it when she’s done regenerating and let you know.”

“Well, that’s more than I’ve gotten from you before, Kathryn. I have a feeling that Seven is going to agree with me,” he said, putting his hand on her forearm.

“I hate to say it, but I think you’re right, Joe.”

“I called HQ on the way back here. I’m going to stay a few days and I don’t want to hear another word about it,” he said quietly.

“All right. Mom, give me my daughter, and where’s Kiernan?”

Gretchen handed Kathryn the baby and told her Kiernan was tucked in bed. She reached out and stroked her daughters hair just like she had when Kathryn was little. Kathryn leaned into the comfort of her Mother’s touch. 

Phoebe came into the living room, cleaned up from all of the paint and wearing a loose pair of sweats and another one of her favorite sweatshirts. Although it fit her personality to a ‘t’ she wore it mostly to get a rise out of her mother. “Math - I’m not your fucking therapist, solve your own problems.” Every time her Mom whipped her with her eyeballs, she would shrug and declare, “I’m an artist, not a mathematician.” It had become a running joke for the two of them, and had lightened up the mood many times when Kathryn was still lost in the Delta. 

Phoebe took baby Annika from Kathryn’s droopy arms and cooed against her perfect little head, telling her all about the possibilities of life, and how much she was looking forward to teaching her how to paint, how to piss off her redheaded mom, and how to get away with murder with the other one. Anni slept right through it.

Kathryn was losing ground quickly in her battle to stay awake, and hated to take the baby away from her Aunti Phoebe. She wrestled with taking Anni with her or leaving her where she was; pragmatism won out. She got off of the sofa, hugged her Mom, thanking her for everything, kissed Phoebe on the cheek, and lastly, kissed her brand new daughter on top of her head. “I’m going to bed. Come and get me when she’s hungry, and I’ll interrupt Seven’s regeneration cycle.”   
  
“You taught us both how to do that, Kathryn. We can wake Seven up.” Grechen said sternly. 

“Okay Mom. G’night.”

Kathryn was asleep as soon as her head hit the pillow.


	8. Conclusion - Finding Home

The sound of birds intruded her peaceful slumber. The closer she drifted to consciousness, the louder the birds became until it was a cacophony in her ears. It wouldn’t have been so bad if they hadn’t nested in the lilac bush right outside of their bedroom window. She liked birdsongs from a distance but having them so close was like having a tea kettle whistling in her ears. She opened her eyes slowly, noting she had slept in. She tossed her feet over the edge of the bed, noticing that Seven wasn’t regenerating. _She must be feeding Anni._ She went through her normal morning routine, and after she had finished, went to get a much needed cup of coffee. As she rounded the corner from the hallway to the living room, she paused briefly to run her hand along the sculpture she had created so long ago. It was crudely done, but clearly showed Kathryn and Seven resting their foreheads against one another and little Kiernan and Anni, looking up at them adoringly. The hidden desire of her heart. Before she had gotten very far, she heard voices coming from the kitchen.

“...and then she vomited. I called Joe and he came right back…”

“Jesus H. Christ, Mom, I’m right here.” She kissed Seven good morning and was slightly disappointed she couldn’t hold Anni yet and equally delighted when Kiernan slithered herself between her knees waiting to be picked up and twirled. Kathryn couldn’t disappoint her, even if she _hadn’t_ had her coffee yet.

Joe tried to sneakily scan her and would have blushed at being caught had he been anything other than a hologram. “Goddamnit, Joe! When I need one of those goddamned things, I ask for one!”

He raised his eyebrows, and made sure to remind her she hadn’t asked for one at any point during one of her migraines.

“I still have the power to decompile your matrix, ya know,” she shot back at him.

“I am aware, but since I was declared a sentient being... thank you for that by the way... you would be facing a murder charge,” he said, swaying his head from side to side, feeling quite proud of himself.

“Jesus H. Christ on a cracker, I’ve created a monster.” The fact of the matter was, she had grown quite fond of Joe since returning to Earth. Now that she was no longer his superior officer, she had grown to appreciate his acerbic wit, his depth of knowledge, and his compassion, even if it _was_ programmed into him.

Seven shifted Anni to her other breast and looked at Kathryn, concern darkening her light eyes. “Gretchen said you got sick last night after I started my regeneration cycle. He wants you to go to HQ and get more in depth scans. I concur. It isn’t normal for you to continue to be incapacitated, and now that we have two children, I would like for you to make an appointment.”

Kathryn rolled her eyes and relented as Keirnan tugged on her nose. She sighed, looked at Joe and nodded. “Set it up.”

“Oh, and Seven, we need to do something about those goddamn birds outside of our window. They are loud, obnoxious, and down right infuriating,” she said, narrowing her eyes.

Seven winced as Anni took a particularly hard tug and offered her spouse a look that made it clear she wouldn’t be moved on the subject, “What would you have us do, Kathryn? Although alien, that particular species is not damaging to our ecosystem and has a relatively short lifespan. Its young will return to that place to lay their eggs and rear their own young. That place is their home. Would you have us displace them simply because you find their shrill cries irritating?”

Kathryn sighed, knowing she was going to have to put up with the goddamn birds from now on. There would always be a parent and their young living in that bush. The quick thought of just tearing the damn thing down passed in and out of her mind. She set Kiernan on the counter while she poured herself another cup, still muttering under her breath about the goddamned birds.

  
  


**~~~**

  
  


“Seven, call Anni and tell her we’re on the way to the hospital; Kiernan has just gone into labor!” Kathryn was beside herself with excitement. Seven looked at her wife and saw the bright shimmering blue of her eyes and smiled an earth shaking grin. 

Neither one of them had been very happy with her when she announced she was getting married, stating that twenty four was still awfully young. 

“Geez Mom, just because you and Mama waited until you were ancient to get married doesn’t mean I have to, I love Cole and he loves me. You’re the one who always says, ‘The time to embrace the best life has to offer, is when it’s right there in front of you.’”

  
“Kathryn, it’s her life, we have to let her live it as she sees fit. Colton is a fine young man, a brilliant scientist and has been instrumental in helping me develop the transwarp drive for Starfleet.” Kiernan wrapped an arm around Seven’s shoulder and leaned against her casually as she spoke. 

“But, honey, what about your career?” Kathryn’s eyes pleaded.

“My career isn’t going anywhere, Mom. I’ll be as much in demand as I am now. Besides, having a career is great but a career can’t keep you warm at night. You know that.” She turned her blue-gray eyes on Kathryn, and that was all it took.

Kathryn’s eyes finally softened, knowing she wasn’t going to change her stubborn daughter’s mind. Kiernan had been the quieter one of the two, taking more after Seven. Introspective, and thoughtful. At the age of five, she sat down at the community piano near the presidio and played a nearly perfect Sun Around the Stars by the famous Betazed composer, Markia. At the age of ten, her mothers had been contacted by the Interstellar School of Music, offering Kiernan a place on their academic roster for the new semester. After discussing it with their daughter, she opted to stay closer to home, and instead, had attended Julliard. 

Anni, on the other hand, was boisterous, competitive, a born leader, and hot tempered. Starfleet Academy had helped smooth out her rough edges, and she had graduated at the top of her class. All of her professors expected great things from her, just as they had her Mama K, when she had been a cadet. She had just been assigned her first posting on the USS _Missouri_ , under Captain Harry Kim. Her first assignment as a bridge officer would help season her even more as she advanced on her command track. She would report for duty in seven days.

Anni was watching the parking lot, knowing they wouldn’t be much longer, and beamed a quasar smile when she saw them walking in. They all lit up the night with their smiles as they went to see Kiernan.

Colton greeted them at the door to Kiernan’s room, his eyes shining like a beacon. “It’s a boy!” He said, towering over them, as he led them to Kiernan’s bedside. Her auburn hair was still damp from the labor, and her little bundle slept quietly in her arms. Kathryn and Seven had never seen her looking so happy. They shared a knowing look as they both remembered how they felt when their girls were born. 

“Everyone, meet Edward Colton Thompson. Eddie,” she said looking at everyone individually, “this is your Grandma Seven, and your Grandma Katie and your Aunty Anni,” she said, as she waved his tiny arm at everyone. Kathryn reached her arms out and Kiernan handed her her grandson. She looked at him with tears falling from her eyes, feeling overwhelmed with joy, and tinged with a bit of sadness as well. She honestly wished her mother had been alive to see this. Her smile radiated from her as she looked into the beautiful eyes of her wife. Suddenly a white hot pain ripped through her skull; she never even knew she was falling when her vision exploded to black.

  
  


**~~~~~**

Kathryn couldn't open her eyes, but at least the searing pain in her head had abated somewhat. She wasn't at home. It didn't smell like Annika and she couldn't hear the birds outside the window that normally chirped her to near madness. Goddamned things; the only reason she didn't have them for dinner was because Seven liked their infernal noises. Goddamned birds. It wouldn't be so bad if they weren't right outside the window. They sounded nice when they were far away. 

_This bed’s too hard_ . She could hear the faint hum of a warp core. _Funny, I don’t remember signing up for an advisory tour_ . She had to open her eyes. Her mouth felt like cotton left too long in the Dorlyxian sunbelt. She tried to open her mouth. Her lips were stuck together. _Annika won't like this_ . _Try harder._ Ah...now she could open her mouth at least. She was making progress. She had just held their first grandchild, and was about to hand him to Annika. _What the hell happened?_

Oh, mom. She's been gone nearly sixteen years now. _Where's Seven? I can't hear her, I can't feel or smell her. Her fragrance is always floating around the house...her natural scent mingled with a hint of lilacs and the ever so slight tang of metal. Right, I'm not home. Where am I?_

She tried again to open her eyes. There...just a slit but an improvement. The lights were too harsh, too bright. _Hands...have to move my hands_ . Were they moving? She couldn't tell. A door...someone just came into wherever the hell she was. A voice, low, grumbling, lyrical. _He sounds a lot like Joe_ . She yelled for him but only managed a squeak. _Glory fuck me runnin Kahless, I just made a noise, it didn't sound much like me though. My throat is so dry, and I'm so tired. Wait, more voices_ . A woman this time. Muffled. Arguing. _There's Joe again, arguing back. Where am I? Shit, did I just move a finger? I think I did. Oh god, my head. I just want to put my hand on my head, is that so fuckin hard!? Apparently, it is. Finally, I think I have some spit. Try again._

 _Success? I think my mouth is open. Toes._ She tried to move her foot. _Why the hell can't I smell Seven and where are her goddamned birds?_ _Anni. Has she taken her post yet?_ _Keirnan, new mother. Where are our children? Where am I? Eyes. More. Yes. Jesus H. Christ they're heavy._ The door. _There! Seven's home. Where are her goddamned birds?_ Voices again. Closer.

“ ap ai , n o en y r es?”

_It's Joe, he's trying to speak to me. What does he want? Where the hell is Seven? Where are our girls? Why is this bed so hard?_

“D ct r, n y gi er s m hing?”

_Ahhhhhhh, there's Annika. Where have you been, my love?_

“Cap in, ca ou en our eyes?” _Oh. It's Joe again. Where is Annika?_

“Perhap I can give her some of my nanoprobes.” _That's my girl. Always thinking outside of the box. Where are those goddamn birds?_

_Oh, I can open my mouth a little more. Eyes. Yes, I'll try the eyes._

“Doctor, she's coming around,” Seven announced.

“Joe? What are you doing here?” her voice was a raw whisper. _Jesus, who shit a load of sand in my mouth?_

Seven and the Doctor looked at each other with concern and confusion. 

“Doctor?” Seven inquired.

“Get her some water, Seven.” 

She could hear Joe just fine now… but apparently… he wasn’t Joe.

Seven held the straw up to her dry lips and watched as she gulped it down. She licked her raw lips, wincing from the pain it caused.

 _Do my hands work yet?_ She lifted one, barely high enough to clear the bed, and held it out to Annika.

“She wants you to hold her hand, Seven,” NotJoe snapped at her.

_Heh… NotJoe's bedside manner could use some work._

Her throat felt better now. “Annika, what happened? Where are our girls?”

Seven looked at the doctor. “What is wrong with her? Do you not know anything!?”

_Me!? What's wrong with you? Why don't you smell right, and where are those GODDAMN BIRDS!_

Finally, she could move her arm. She brought Annika's left hand to her lips and kissed it, just the way she liked it to be kissed. She sucked in breath and opened her eyes as wide as they would go, which at that point, wasn’t very wide. “Annika,” she croaked, “where's your wedding ring? Where are the kids? Where’s our grandson, and where are those goddamned birds?”

Seven felt hot tears running down her face. “Captain, you are frightening me.”

She let out a croak that was supposed to be a laugh. “Since when do you call me Captain, Annika?” Her voice was still a raspy whisper.

“Seven, stand aside, please,” the Doctor said, as he tried to shoulder Seven out of his way.

Kathryn narrowed her eyes – more than they currently were – and glared at NotJoe. “Don't...you...tell...my...wife...to...stand aside.”

The Doctors photonic jaw hit the deck. He dragged it to the other side of the biobed and performed his scans from there.

“Her neurological function is normal, vital signs are within acceptable parameters, and all of her damaged pathways have been repaired. I don't understand.”

 _The doors again._ _Chakotay? Aren’t you supposed to be on some remote planet digging up the bones of your ancestors and muttering a cuchi moya or something? What the fuck are you doing here? Why isn't your hair gray?_

Kathryn tried to sit up. The best she could manage looked like a nod.

“Report,” Chakotay said quietly.

“She's confused, agitated. She thinks my name is Joe and that she and Seven are married with kids!”

“What?” Chakotay was dumbfounded. “Can you put her back out? Let her rest some more?”

The Doctor curled the side of his mouth up in a grimace. “I hate to do that Commander, she’s been under a little longer than I wanted her to be in the first place. It would be better for her to…” 

“Do something for her. Now!” Seven glared daggers into his matrix.

He pressed something against her neck, and it was back to black. The last thing she remembered before the lights went out was screaming Annika's name.

She was swimming closer to the surface now. The closer she got, the louder the sounds. They still sounded very far away but she kept swimming. There, she could see the surface, she was almost there.

“....too soon last time.”

“Ah, she's coming around,” the Doctor reported. 

_Fuck me, not NotJoe again..._

Kathryn opened her eyes, trying to make sense of what they were telling her. Joe said that she was in _Voyagers_ sickbay. _Am I in the museum on the presidio?_ She tried to push herself to a sitting position but didn't have the strength. “Joe, raise my bed a little.” The whip of command was a whisper, but still unmistakable.

He ran the scanner over her again confirming that all of her readings were normal.

“Why are you looking at me like that for fuck sake? Where's my wife? Why isn't she here? Where are my kids, and why the hell am I in a goddamned museum? Why is the warp core humming? B’Elanna disconnected that 24 years ago! Someone had better get me some goddamn answers or heads are gonna start rolling!”

“Captain, you've been...”

“Goddammit Joe, if you're going to call me by my rank, for fuck sake, get it right! I've been a Admiral for almost 25 years now, what the fuck is wrong with you!?”

NotJoe turned his head and looked at Chakotay, who was standing slack jawed. “Get Seven down here.”

“Kathryn,” the Doctor tested; it seemed to be the right call because she didn't try to dismantle his program with her glare, “what's the last thing you remember before waking up here?”

She blinked her eyes. “Kiernan and Cole just had their first baby. Anni met us at the hospital and Kiernan had just handed me our first grandchild, Edward Colton Thompson; I was just about to hand him to Annika when I got a really bad migraine. You know the ones; you made me get a fucking scan for ‘em at HQ!” she said, glaring at him. 

NotJoe shook his head slowly. “Kathryn, Seven found you in the holodeck four days ago.”

“That's not possible.” She fought the weakness in her body, finally managing to fully sit up, as the sheet slid into her lap. Remembering Chakotay was lurking nearby, she snatched it up quickly and covered herself. Although Kathryn had gotten used to being disrobed for examinations, Seven still didn’t care for it much where her wife was concerned. She wouldn’t like it at all knowing Chakotay was in the room. 

Her eyes searched frantically, wondering where Seven was. It wasn’t like her at all not to be near her when she was having medical issues. Unless it would cause damage to her Borg systems, Joe had learned a long time ago not to argue about it. She saw the doors slide open and her lips automatically smiled. Annika was finally there. She watched her stride quickly across the room, until she was cut off by Joe, who, judging by the looks they were both passing her way, was filling her in on what had been happening.

“Goddammit, I'm not an invalid. Stop talking about me like I'm not here!” She croaked out in frustration.

Seven shouldered her way past the doctor and took the hand Kathryn offered her. She didn't know why but it felt like the right thing to do. Kathryn clasped her hand around the back of Annika's neck and pulled her in for a hungry, desperate kiss filled with longing and need.

Seven was frozen for a moment, and then returned the kiss the best she knew how.

When Kathryn pulled away, her eyes were brimming with tears. “You're not my Annika.”

Seven felt her heart shatter as she saw the love and joy in Kathryn's eyes turn to confusion and anguish. “I...I am Seven of Nine, Tertiary Adjunct of…”

“Unimatrix Zero One” Kathryn finished with her. “You haven't been Seven of Nine to me for over 25 years. You've been my Annika. My wife, my partner, my lover… my heart and soul. The mother of our children, Kiernan and Anni, and grandmother of Edward Colton Thompson.” Kathryn struggled to keep the tears in her eyes from falling. 

“I am sorry, I have never been 'your Annika.'” Seven didn’t know what to do. She had never felt so frightened and confused. Not even being severed from the collective left her feeling so… helpless. The person in the biobed looked like Kathryn Janeway and it hurt Seven to see the love sparkling in her eyes fade to the pain only a deep loss can bring. She had felt that kind of loss and pain when her ‘son,’ One, had died to save _Voyager_ . Her nanoprobes had interacted with the Doctor’s mobile emitter, creating a 29th century Borg drone. His act of heroism forced him to interact with the collective, making them aware of his existence. Had he not given up his life, the Borg would have pursued _Voyager_ to the ends of the universe to get him back. When he refused treatment for his massive injuries, Seven had said to him, _“You are hurting me.”_ He replied, _“You will adapt,”_ and then his lifesigns terminated. She saw an even deeper loss in the eyes of the woman in front of her.

“And, you,” she said, leveling her gaze at NotJoe. “You're still just the Doctor?”

He looked slightly confused. “Uh, yes.”

“Well, I always thought you could have come up with a hell of a better name than Joe, but for the time being, that's what I'm used to so that's what I'll call you.”

“As you wish, Captain.”

“Admiral!” She snapped.

“Whatever you say,” he said sarcastically.

“Well, run your goddamned tests then. Check me for neutrino emissions, phase distortions, photonic fleas for all I care, just get me some goddamn answers.”

Three hours later, the Doctor, who Admiral Janeway was still insisting on calling Joe, confirmed the worst news she had ever gotten in her life. Worse than when her father and Justin died. Worse than getting stranded in the Delta Quadrant, and even worse than when her mother died.

She was, without the shadow of a doubt, Captain Kathryn Elizabeth Janeway of the USS _Voyager_.

She did the only thing she could do. She slammed her command mask so far down onto her face, she didn't think it would ever come loose again.

“Get me a uniform, Joe,” she commanded.

She didn't bother with a privacy screen. What did it matter now, anyway.

She refused to go back to her quarters, instead taking the guest quarters down the corridor. She had Chakotay transfer all of her command protocols to that workstation and reprogram the door sensor to her biometric data.

The quarters were almost exactly the same but backwards, just like she had been feeling ever since she first woke up. Instead of her workstation being to her right when she walked in, it was on her left. Instead of her bedroom being to her left, it was to her right. It had the same Starfleet issue sofa under the large view port, it even looked exactly the same as the one in her former quarters but this sofa isn't the one where she had fallen asleep against Seven of Nine. It wasn't where they had shared their first kiss, the one that lit the flame in her heart. That replicator wasn't the one that made their engagement rings and wedding bands they wore as a sign of their deep and abiding commitment to one another. That bedroom wasn't where they made love and had moaned words of love and passion to each other. She looked down at her empty ring finger and wanted to scream. She had worn that wedding set for twenty five years… or so she thought.

The door chime sounded exactly the same as her former cabin. “Come,” she croaked roughly.

Tuvok, Chakotay, NotJoe, B'Elanna Torres and most notably, Seven of Nine, filed in. She noted that Seven remained standing in her customary pose as the others found places to sit. She wanted to laugh at the irony of it all. _Her_ Seven had given up that stance a long time ago when she finally realized that comfort was not irrelevant. It had happened shortly after Kiernan was born. Darling, sweet Kiernan, taking after her and her Mama A.

Janeway stood beneath the view port, looking, but not seeing the stars hanging in the black expanse. Chakotay had ordered a full stop; they were at station keeping. She probably would have done the same. She took a fortifying breath and turned around, leaning against the wall, more for support than because she wanted to. Her legs still feeling incredibly weak and rather shaky.

“Who wants to start?” She asked, running her eyes from person to person.

They all looked at each other. None of them _wanted_ to start.

“Oh for fuck sake, NotJoe, you start then,” she said through narrowed eyes, the whip of command crystal clear even though her voice was still hoarse and raspy.

He bristled at being called that but dared not say anything. The woman standing in the room at present was, physically, Kathryn Janeway, yet she wasn't. Her eyes were vacant, lifeless, and void of emotion. She was the husk of what Kathryn Janeway had once been.

“Seven, you start. You're the one who found her,” NotJoe said.

Looking at the Doctor, Seven began. “At 2:58 a.m., Earth standard time, I went to the Captain's quarters to speak with her…” 

“I’m right here, An… Seven. Speak to me, not them,” Janeway kept her head down. It was too painful to look into eyes so excruciatingly familiar, yet no longer sparkling brightly with love.

Seven’s eyebrows knitted together in confusion for a moment, and then she continued, “You did not answer. I queried the computer for your whereabouts. I then proceeded to holodeck 2 and entered the da Vinci program at 3:08 a.m. I proceeded to your work area and found you lying on the deck, unconscious. I initiated an emergency site to site transport where I summoned NotJ...the Doctor. He performed a full examination while I scanned for anomalous readings.”

Seven looked at NotJoe and he continued. “When I examined you, Captain,” he made sure to emphasize her rank, “I discovered that several of the neural pathways in your hypothalamus had been compromised. It appeared to be some kind of virus, causing the pathways to be overstimulated and new pathways to be forged spontaneously. The virus also affected the secondary pathways in your limbic system and pituitary gland. I repaired the damage and administered a paralytic to allow your body to continue to heal. In essence, I put you into a medically induced coma. 

_And, a warm Delta Quadrant welcome back to Dr. Smug. Definitely not Joe._

She leaned heavily against the wall as her weakened legs protested loudly at bearing her weight. She told them to shut the fuck up and deal with it. Her empty gray eyes scanned the room to see who was going to take over next. She thought as much when the half Klingon leaned forward.

“Seven and I, along with Ensign Kim, scoured the holodeck for anything that would give us some answers. We weren't finding anything so,” she cast a sidelong glance at the Borg, “Seven interfaced directly with the holomatrix.

“You assimilated it,” the voice was cold and hollow.

“In a sense,” she responded, noting the chill that shivered up her spine from Janeway's empty tone. “I did not have to fully assimilate it in order to access the holomatrix, only the log data. I transferred the data to the Engineering lab where Lt. Torres and I performed an in-depth…

“And?” Janeway pinned her with an impatient look that made Seven shiver, and then the Captain dropped her eyes back to the floor.

“At 2:18 a.m., a band of ionized radiation intersected _Voyager_. We have no explanation as to how, but it interacted with the holoprogram. As you were there at the time of intersection, we believe it was responsible for your injuries.

“Chakotay, anything to add?”

“We've worked around the clock to find answers, Captain. As soon as I got the call that you were injured, I initiated command protocols and ordered a full stop. We're currently at station keeping.”

“Ship status, Engineering.”

“Engineering is operating at 98.6 efficiency. The warp core is… ”

“If you say the warp core is humming, the gel packs are stabilized, and all's right with the world, I'm going to flush you out an airlock.” Janeway said, as she gazed out of the viewport. She looked back at her old friend and saw that her face had gone a bit pale. _Probably too soon for familiar humor._ She shifted her gaze to the left of B’Elanna.

“Tuvok, you've been awfully quiet, old friend,” she said, returning her eyes to the viewport.

“My security teams have swept the entire ship for signs of intruders or other phenomenon. They have...”

She held up a hand to quiet him, but never took her eyes away from the starfield.

“I know. They've revealed nothing.”

“That is correct, Captain.”

“I guess that's it, then. NotJoe, when might I be cleared for duty?”

He gave an indignant snort. He wanted to tell her as soon as she stopped calling him NotJoe but considering she had just threatened to toss B'Elanna out of an airlock, he erred on the side of caution. “Captain, we may want to speak privately about that.”

She nodded. “I see. Meet me here tomorrow at 0900 and we'll 'speak about' it.”

She waved her arm toward the door. “You're dismissed. Chakotay, a moment, please.”

After everyone had shuffled out the big bear of a man walked up to Kathryn and was about to give her a reassuring squeeze on her shoulder. He stopped short when her ice cold glare penetrated his eyes. “You are never to lay a hand on me again, is that clear?”

He felt like she had just slapped him. “Yes, ma'am.” He said, his dark features awash with confusion.

“From this day forward you will refer to me as Captain, Ma'am, hell, I’ll even take Sir. Is _that_ clear?”

“Yes, Captain.” He straightened his spine.

“Good. I want you to assign my former quarters to Seven of Nine and I want it done tonight. You are to inform me the minute you enter the change into the ships logs. I want her alcove installed no later than three days from now. She can assist B'Elanna since she knows the systems the best.”

“Captain?”

“Did you develop a hearing problem when I was in a coma?” Her gray eyes glinted dangerously.

“No, Captain,” he said, feeling extremely confused and put out. 

“You're dismissed, Commander.”

Although he appeared to walk with his normal gate, he felt like he slunk his way out the door.

The Captain finally allowed herself to lie down on the sofa and her legs were eternally grateful for respite. She put her arm behind her head and felt absolutely nothing. She got up and walked to the bedroom closet, pulled out the spare pillow and blanket and then took her uniform off, kicking it carelessly into the corner. Clad in only a Starfleet tank top and her underwear, she drug the blanket behind her and settled herself on the sofa. It was the first time she’d tried to sleep without Annika by her side or in her arms for more than 25 years.

She concentrated on one point of light first. Judging by the color, it was probably a neutron star. She ran through everything she knew about neutron stars, and then fixed her eyes on the next point, a Red Hypergiant. She was searching for a Blue Supergiant when a sound froze her eyes.

There was still only one person who would dare disturb her in the middle of the night. If she stayed quiet, maybe she would go away. Then she remembered. _“...I meant that I don’t need a code because I can override the locking mechanism...._ ” 

Again, with the chirping. She tossed the blanket aside and gingerly made her way to the door. 

“Open”

And, there she stood, in all her splendor. Kathryn's arms automatically flew up to wrap themselves around her, but the confused look in Seven’s eyes had stopped her. She let her arms fall to her sides. She didn't bother to apologize.

“What can I do for you, Seven of Nine?”

“I've just been informed by Commander Chakotay that I am to move into your former quarters.”

She made no move to invite her inside. Seven's eyes unwittingly wandered across her breasts, down the slender, toned legs, and then back up again, more than a little surprised to find her standing there in her underwear.

“I wish to discuss the reason for this...unexpected act,” Seven said, tilting her head.

Kathryn would have smiled at the familiar gesture if it hadn’t been so excruciating. “The answer is simple, Seven of Nine.” She took a deep breath, “Because I love you... I hated myself for not seeing sooner that you needed a place to call your own rather than being forced to live in the cargo bay, for fuck sake. You aren't cargo. You are a living, breathing, passionate, warm, affectionate, witty, intelligent, loving human being, and you deserve to be treated as such.”

Seven just stood there.

“Did you need anything else, Seven of Nine?”

“Am I the same Annika you fell in love with?”

“...No.”

“I understand. Thank you for your kind gesture and have a pleasant evening.”

She just broke her heart and she knew it. She just couldn't trust it to be real. She lived an entire lifetime in the span of a few hours only to wake up and have it savagely ripped away from her.

How could she believe again?

Kathryn stepped back, breaking the bio beam. The door slid closed and she slumped against the bulkhead, slowly sliding to the floor. If there was anything left of the woman behind the command mask, she was certain she would be curled up in a ball, sobbing her eyes out right now. _That_ woman had died the minute it was confirmed that the 25 years she had spent with Annika, the love of her life, had all been a barbaric joke.

Her chime chirped again.

“Oh, for fuck sake.” She didn't want to stand in the doorway again in her underwear.

“Come”

“Captain,” concern colored her ice blue eyes as she saw the Captain on the floor, hugging her knees to her chest. “Are you damaged?” 

“Yes, but not in the way you’re thinking.” She slowly stood up and gestured the younger woman inside. “Please, make yourself comfortable.”

“Thank you, Captain.” She placed a draped item on the coffee table and then sat on the edge of the sofa, back straight, hands clasped and feet together. “I have brought you this. I was able to retrieve it from the da Vinci program. I thought you might like to have it.”

It was hard to imagine this same woman, head flung back, moaning and whispering sweet words of love, or filthy words of passion, but Kathryn knew. Kathryn knew how she tasted, what profanities pushed her over the edge, how to coax and tease her. Kathryn knew how to love her, how to hold her, and how to allow herself to be held.

She willed her legs to obey her for just a few minutes more as she made her way to the sofa and unceremoniously plopped down. She closed her eyes and let out a long sigh.

“Your muscles are still sore, I see.” Seven said.

“Yes, it'll pass soon enough.”

“Are you going to open your present?”

“Ah, yes. The sculpture.” She reached out and pulled the cover off. There in front of her was the sculpture she had been working on. In its current state, it merely looked like two taller figures and two shorter ones. Human, with some features but not clearly defined. She knew what it would have become had she finished it. It had occupied a prominent place on the bookcase in their living room. She touched it every time she had walked by it, so much so, that there was now a worn spot where her hand had rubbed over the years.

Kathryn gasped and ran a finger along the jawline of the figure that would have become Seven, then to Kiernan and finally, to Anni.”

“Who are they, Kathryn?”

It was so normal for her to hear her name spoken by that voice that she didn't even notice it.

“This is our first born, Kiernan. I carried her,” she lovingly traced where she knew the features would be, “and this is Anni, our youngest. You carried her. I was so grateful when she was born. Not only was she a vision of perfection, but you were able to regenerate again and stop being a bitch on wheels.” A lopsided, nostalgic smile grew across her features before turning sad and defeated again.

Seven didn’t know what a ‘bitch on wheels’ was but she did recognize the agony in the Captain’s voice when she spoke so quietly. “I am very sorry that this life was lost to you, Kathryn. I am equally sorry that I didn't get the chance to experience it with you.”

Kathryn turned and placed her hand on Seven's cheek. “So am I, Seven of Nine. I loved you an entire lifetime and you… you barely know me. I know everything about you. I know what makes you laugh and cry. I know how you like your tea. I know what frightens you. I know what makes you nervous. I know what you sound like and I know the taste of you. My Annika knows the same things about me, so you see, Seven of Nine, it's not that you couldn't be my Annika in time, it's that my Annika and I got there _together_. You would forever be playing catch up in this relationship and that wouldn't be fair to either one of us, would it?”

Seven tilted her head and considered what was said. “I would always be 'behind the 8 ball.’ You would always be an entire lifetime ahead of me.”

Seven felt a tear slide down her face. Kathryn held her finger under it to catch it when it fell, and then she sipped it off of her fingertip. “A part of you lives in me, always.”

“I wish I could have known you like your Annika did. I see such deep loss in your eyes now…”

“I do, too, Seven.” Kathryn stood up and Seven followed. They walked slowly to the door, both knowing once Seven left, they would be nothing but Captain and crew mate. No more velocity, no more sharing the da Vinci program and no more late night philosophical discussions. That was just how it had to be.

Seven waited for Kathryn to walk her to the door, as was their custom, when a bright flash ripped through the cabin, momentarily blinding them. She watched with fear gripping her throat as the Captain’s body went rigid and her eyes blankly stared at the bulkhead.

When Kathryn opened her eyes, she appeared to be in the da Vinci program. Spots danced before her and a sparking shower of radiant energy swirled over and around her. She wondered what the hell was going on when she heard an unfamiliar voice reverberating in her mind saying, “We are the Kaosh'eaoer, we are a telepathic race.” Kathryn watched the golden sparkles ebb and flow through, and around her. “Your cries reached out to us in what you call the ionization band… your loneliness and isolation… pained us. We have revealed to you the deepest desire of your heart, yet your… healer… interrupted our process… you have retained your memories from your Talia’hl… your ‘dream life.’ This should not be. We must now perform the Frs’apgh… the restoration to complete your journey.” 

She thought her ‘journey’ _was_ complete. What more could she take? The Kaosh’eaoer heard the questions running through her mind and proceeded to answer, “The journey will be complete only after the restoration is performed. Once it is complete, you will have no remembrance of the Talia’hl…”

“You’ve done this before.” 

“Yes, when a great need arises. Very rarely does the Talia’hl get interrupted. The entire process should have only taken 60 of your minutes.”

If Seven hadn’t found her, and the doctor hadn’t done the surgery, she would have woken up in the holodeck, none the wiser of the experience.

“Will I…” she started to ask.

“No… You will retain no knowledge of us… only the footprint we leave behind… an unquenchable drive to fulfill the deepest desire of your heart and a feeling of familiarity when you are finding your way… we must proceed… we are losing our strength…” 

Kathryn got the distinct impression that they weren’t used to communicating via mind link. She nodded her head and closed her eyes. Anything to stop the pain. She could feel a warm energy suffusing her body. As the Kaosh'eaoer filled her mind, she saw the images of her ‘dream life’ play before her and then saw them slip fade away, one by one. She fought, to no avail, to hang onto them. For each memory that slipped away, a tear ran down her face.

When she opened her eyes, she was looking directly into the very confused eyes of Seven of Nine.

“What’s going on, Seven?” She looked around the cabin she was in. “Why are we in the guest quarters? 

“Kathryn?”

Momentarily taken aback by the use of her first name, she was about to take Seven to task for it. The moment passed as quickly as it had come. Somehow, it felt right… no… familiar, for Seven to call her by her name.

“Seven, what the hell is happening?”

“You were found in sickbay 4 days ago, the doctor operated on you, and you woke up thinking we were married and had children… you said you lived an entire lifetime in the span of hours. Do you not remember now?”

Kathryn felt the color drain out of her face as she tried desperately to remember something...anything to confirm Seven’s story but somehow… she knew Seven was telling the truth.

“Why are we in the guest quarters?” Maybe this explanation would be something more plausible.

“You did not want to live in your quarters anymore. You said there were too many memories there. You told Chakotay to assign them to me.”

That sounded more like her. It had taken decades before she could set foot on Tau Ceti Prime after her father and Justin had died there, something that continued to haunt her. And then she realized what else Seven had just said.

“To you?” Kathryn felt another wave of confusion ripple through her.

“Yes. You stated that you did it because you love me and you hated yourself for not seeing sooner that I needed a place to call my own rather than being forced to live in the cargo bay, ‘for fuck sake.’ You stated that I am not cargo. That I am a living, breathing, passionate, warm, affectionate, witty, intelligent, loving human being, and that I deserve to be treated as such.”

“Well, that must have been some experience. If what you’re telling me is true…” she held up a hand to forestall Seven’s interruption that Seven had no need to lie, “and I’m sure it is, I have apparently had quite an adventure. Nothing is going to be solved tonight. I’m tired and I want to go to sleep. We’ll sort this all out in the morning.” Seeing a brief look flash through Seven’s blue eyes, she felt a spark of recognition and no idea where it had come from. She put her hand gently on Seven’s shoulder, and spoke softly, “Okay?”

“Agreed,” Seven’s lips curled up at the corners. To anyone else it wouldn’t have been perceptible but Kathryn _knew_.

The following day, Janeway ordered that she and Seven switch quarters so she could have her own back. Chakotay didn’t question her, which she thought was rather odd. She also thought it was odd that he hadn’t called her by her name when they were alone, as was his habit. She didn’t mind it, it had always irritated her that he had thought they were familiar enough for him to take that particular liberty. She hadn’t said anything about it in the interest of keeping peace between them.

It had taken a week for her to start feeling like herself again. The senior staff who were aware of her little adventure were still treading gingerly, especially Seven. She had been unusually quiet and contemplative. Kathryn could understand why. It wasn’t everyday that someone found out they were the love of someone’s dream life.

Kathryn put on a clean uniform and prepared to take the mantle of command back from Chakotay. She still had an hour before Alpha shift and sat down at her console.

 _Personal log: Stardate_ 62159.5

 _I’m finally starting to feel like myself again after I apparently lived an entire lifetime in a matter of hours. That’s what I’ve been told anyway. I have no memory of it but I wish I did. It sounded surprising, yet wonderful. We were happily married, had children and even had a grandchild from what I’ve been told. Of course, I’ve always thought Seven was beautiful and I_ **_did_ ** _feel sparks of attraction for her at various times. I got so skilled at burying them, I think it just became second nature to me. I didn’t even remember feeling them until this happened. Now I feel like I’m looking at her with new eyes, and I think she is, too. I suppose we’ll never know why it happened, perhaps it’s best not to question these kinds of things._

_The doctor has confirmed that I am in excellent health and can return to duty. B’Elanna has taken to calling him NotJoe, something she apparently got from me when I woke up. I know he acts like it chaps his ass but honestly, I think he’s starting to get used to it. I heard Mr. Paris call him ‘Nacho’ yesterday and almost sprayed my coffee on someone. Phoebe would love it._

_In light of this incident, and after much soul searching I have come to the conclusion that I don’t need to make the rest of this journey alone, nor do I want to. There are no hard and fast regulations against a superior officer having a relationship with a civilian contractor and I am done punishing myself for the choices I have made as the captain of this ship. I deserve to be happy, and so does everyone else on board. So..._

_I asked Seven on a date._

_She said yes._

_After all, the time to embrace the best life has to offer, is when it’s right there in front of you. I can’t help feeling like I’m finding home._

End log.

© 2008/2020, P. Rhapsody O’Brien. All rights reserved. Duplication ( **including** downloading/archiving) is PROHIBITED without written permission from the author. 

The songs came from my own warped mind. © 2020 P. Rhapsody O’Brien. All rights reserved. Unauthorized duplication is prohibited but feel free to sing them the next time you get drunk on Virlaxian Sundrops. :)


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